What’s the secret to a great conversation between a man and a woman?
If you’ve been reading the newsletters I’ve been sending out, you will have discovered that flirting is extremely important when having a conversation with a woman…but, it’s not the ONLY thing that matters.
In fact, there are 100s of things that add up to a great conversation taking place between a man and a woman. The secret I’m going to share with you today is what we call the 3L Technique.
The three L’s stand for:
- Laugh.
- Listen.
- Lead.
Let’s take a look at the 3 elements in more detail, so you understand how each of them work together to create a great conversation between you and a woman.
1. Laugh
What is it?
This is where you have the confidence to laugh, smile and be upbeat in your conversation with a woman.
It’s also about your ability to make a woman laugh and enjoy herself during a conversation with you.
Why is it important?
Women often say, “I want a guy who can make me laugh” and this is because a woman’s attraction to a man is largely based on how he makes her feel.
If you can’t make a woman feel good during a conversation, she will assume that a relationship with you would be boring and would lack fun, exciting and desirable emotions.
2. Listen
What is it?
This is where you are being present and attentive during the conversation. It’s about listening to what the woman is saying (and not saying) to come up with things to say that allow the conversation to continue.
Why is it important?
Women want to feel understood. Unless you really listen to what she is saying (and not saying), you won’t be able to pick up on who she really is as a person.
This will result in a ‘surface-level conversation’ and you will find it difficult to connect with her.
When you know how to listen correctly to what a woman is saying (and not saying), you will connect with her on deeper and more meaningful levels than other guys can.
Naturally, this will result in her falling in love with you faster and easier because you and her have a unique connection that is based on more than just ‘surface-level stuff’.
3. Lead
What is it?
This is where you lead the conversation by exploring topics that she brings up, coming up with new topics yourself, asking the right questions and taking things to the next level (e.g. phone number, kiss, date, sex, relationship).
Why is it important?
Women are naturally attracted to men who can lead.
This does not mean that you have to be a leader who leads other people.
It just means that you need to be able to lead a situation/conversation with a woman, instead of waiting for her to do it.
Women want to relax into a more feminine role around you as you take on your natural ability as a man to lead a woman and move things forward.
Striking the Right Balance Between Laughing, Listening and Leading
It’s important to point out that you need to include the RIGHT BALANCE of the 3 elements if you want your conversations with women to be exciting, interesting and attractive.
For example, some guys:
- Are good at making women laugh.
- Are good listeners.
- Are good at leading.
However, using just ONE or TWO of the 3 elements (Laugh, Listen, Lead) in your conversation with a woman is not enough if you want to spark attraction, develop a proper connection with her and then take things to the next level.
Why?
Too much laughter and messing around and you can come across as ‘silly’ or goofy. Too much listening and you can come across as soft, needy, creepy or as though you don’t really have any opinions of your own.
Too much leading and can you come across as too bossy or dominant.
What is the right balance of the 3 elements?
The answer is: It depends on who you really are as a person, who the woman really is as a person, the dynamic between you both and the environment in which the conversation is taking place.
When you listen to The Ultimate Guide to Conversation, you’ll hear Ben, Stu and I explain how to achieve the right balance in any conversation you find yourself in.
This will allow you to spark and maintain a woman’s attraction, as well as easily progress towards sex and a loving relationship with her (or whatever your intentions are with her).
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