Imagine that you’re in a social setting right now and you meet a pretty girl.
How are you going to get her to want you sexually and romantically, rather than just seeing you as a friend?
What are you going to say and do to avoid the friend zone and instead end up with her jumping up on top of you and bouncing away a few hours later or maybe on the first, second or third date?
What are you going to do to make that happen rather than her saying, “Sorry. I just see you as a friend”?
Well, I’m going to help you with that in this video.
Let’s begin with tip number 1…
1. Flip the script
So many guys make this mistake when they meet a woman that they want to have sex or a relationship with.
The guy hands over the power to her.
It’s up to her.
He’s got to try to get her to like him.
He’s got to hopefully make her see that he’s good enough for her and then, he might be able to get a chance with her.
That is the worst way to go about things, especially with attractive women.
If you do that, you’ll usually end up in the friend zone because she’ll see you as another guy who was hoping to be accepted by her.
So, to avoid getting friendzoned or rejected, you should flip the script as early on in the conversation with a woman as you can.
In other words, rather than trying hard to be hopefully accepted by her and liked by her, you should make her feel the need to be accepted and liked by you.
One of the easiest ways to do that, is to playfully judge her as you talk to her.
What you will notice when I give you the example in a second, is that women do this to men and most men don’t know how to handle it.
So, when you have the balls to flip the script and take on the role as the one who is doing the judging and you do it in a playful way, women love it.
They love it that they’ve finally met a guy who isn’t on the back foot and trying his hardest to say all the right things to be accepted and liked by her.
Instead, you have the confidence and social intelligence to flip the script, by playfully judging her and as a result, suddenly making her feel the need to be accepted and liked by you.
So, for example: Imagine that you’re talking to a pretty woman in a social event and you get to a point in the conversation where you ask her, “Do you have any brothers and sisters?”
She says, “Yes. I have an older brother and an older sister.”
What are you going to say there?
What most guys will do at that point is ask a neutral friendly type of question like, “Oh, so do you have a close family?” or a guy will simply change the conversation and he’ll ask her another question and another question and he’ll be trying to get to know her.
Those type of conversations can go on for hours and hours and lead to nowhere.
Yet, when you flip the script by occasionally judging a woman in a playful way, she feels sparks of attraction for you and she feels the need to be accepted and liked by you.
So, you asked her, “Do you have any brothers and sisters?” and she said, “Yes. I have an older brother and an older sister.”
At that point, to flip the script, you can then say something like this. “Ah, it all makes sense now.”
She then asks, “Why?” and you playfully say, “You seem to have that bratty little sister vibe about you. You were a little brat when you were young, weren’t you?” or something like this, “The youngest? Right. The little bratty sister. That was you, wasn’t it?” or something like this, “Ah, the bratty little sister. It all makes sense now.”
When you say that sort of thing to a woman, you will almost certainly get a laugh and at the very least, the woman will smile and feel attracted to the fact that you have the confidence to say that to her.
By the way, if it turns out that she was the eldest child, you can say something like this. “Ah, the boring older sister. Yeah. That makes sense now” or something like this. “Ah, the boring older sister. Always the goody two-shoes. Right?”
She will then almost certainly smile or have a bit of a laugh and explain herself.
If she was a bit of a goody two-shoes, she will say that and you can then playfully say that she is boring and that you are thinking that she might have been a boring older sister and now she has just confirmed it.
It’s all out in the open now. Her embarrassing secret (of being the boring older sister) has been revealed.
Alternatively, if she’s the middle child, you can say something like this. “Ah, the rebellious middle child. Was that you, or were you the straight laced goody two-shoes type of middle child? Which one are you?”
If she says that she was a rebellious child, “The rebel? What sort of trouble did you get up to?”
If she said that she was the goody two-shoes type, “Little Miss Goody Two-Shoes. Never takes any risks, never does anything fun, she’s always straight laced doing the right thing. Come on. You need to lighten up a bit. Enjoy yourself, girl. Come on.”
So, you’re taking something that could be a boring detail of a conversation and turning it into something that makes her feel like she’s under the spotlight.
You’re not talking to her in a way where you’re hopefully trying to get her acceptance, or where you’re trying to jump through all of her hoops and get a pass from her, or where you’re hoping that she likes you because you’re being really nice to her.
Instead, you’re so confident and non-needy that you can say things like that to her and what you’ll find when you do, is that women love it.
Most guys do not have the balls to say something like that to a woman.
They also don’t have the awareness that saying something like that to a woman makes her feel attracted.
So, they don’t do it.
Yet, the guys who are aware of this sort of thing do it and they make women feel attracted to them.
They don’t end up in the friend zone.
They don’t end up in a 1-hour or a 2-hour conversation about, “Oh, where did you grow up? What school did you go to? What did you study? Do you have any brothers and sisters? Oh, do you have a close family? Yeah. Family’s important, isn’t it?” Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
They get along for 1 or 2 hours and then the guy asks for her phone number and she says, “Sorry. I don’t see you in that way,” or, “Sorry. I’m not looking for a boyfriend,” or, “Sorry. I only see you as a friend.”
He’s friendzoned because he’s only talking to her in a friendly way and trying to get along with her, when what he actually needs to do is make her feel a spark of attraction for him.
By the way…
How does playfully judging a woman make her feel a spark of attraction for you?
Well, she feels attracted to your confidence because you have the balls to say something like that to her.
She feels attracted to your social intelligence because you are aware of the dynamic that exists between men and women.
The dynamic is that almost all men out there do not flip the script.
Instead, they interact with a woman and allow her to be the one who is judging.
The woman makes judging statements or asks judgemental type of questions and the guy feels like he needs to explain himself to her, he needs to say the correct answer, otherwise she’s going to lose interest.
Yet, when a guy behaves like that, it doesn’t attract the woman.
What attracts the woman is when a man has the balls to flip the script and judge her.
Not in a serious way, but in a playful way.
Doing it in a playful way makes it fun and having the confidence to actually do it and the social intelligence and awareness to do it makes it attractive to her.
She looks at you as one of the rare guys who isn’t desperate, who isn’t trying to be accepted by a woman, who isn’t quickly trying to explain himself when a woman makes a judging type of statement or asks a judgemental type of question.
Instead, you have the confidence to playfully judge her, to put her under the spotlight.
For example: You ask her what she does for a living and she says that she works as an accountant.
You can then say something like this. “An accountant. Ah, that makes sense now. You did seem kind of nerdy…where’s your calculator?”
So, what’s important to understand, is that when you’re interacting with a woman that you find attractive, it’s either going to be you or her who is the one doing the judging, who is in the position of power, who is the selector.
You can put yourself in that position if you want to and if you do, women will find you attractive for it.
Yet, if you allow the woman to be in that position where she is judging you and making you feel like you need to explain yourself and impress her and get accepted by her, then you’re almost certainly going to end up in the friend zone if you try to explain yourself and hopefully try to impress her and be accepted by her.
She’s going to feel turned off by that.
Of course, unattractive women do like that because they like it when a guy is unsure of himself and doesn’t know his own value, but attractive women want to be with a guy who feels like he is good enough for her, or ideally is more than good enough for her.
One of the ways to communicate that to her is to have the balls to playfully judge her as you’re talking to her.
You’re not afraid to say that sort of thing when you’re interacting with her and you have the confidence to take on the position as the selector, as the one who is doing the judging.
For the majority of guys out there, if they witness an interaction between a man and a woman where the man said that she was the bratty little sister, the boring older sister or the rebellious middle child and she then felt attracted to him, the guy watching on would think, “What the heck? What is going on there?”
Well, what is going on is that women feel attracted when you display certain personality traits and behaviors that are naturally attractive to women.
In that example that I gave you, she’s also going to feel a spark of attraction for the fact that you can make her laugh.
She’s also going to feel a spark of attraction for you making her feel girly in comparison to your masculinity.
You have the masculinity to put her under the spotlight.
“Ah, the bratty little sister. That makes sense now.”
Rather than just talking to her in a friendly neutral way.
“Oh, so you have an older brother and older sister. Oh, that’s cool. Yeah. I’ve got an older brother, an older sister and a younger sister. Yeah. Oh, big family. Yeah.”
Big difference.
One approach makes the woman feel sparks of attraction, the other makes her feel like the guy is just a friend.
The guy gets friendzoned.
So, with this tip here, remember to flip the script as early on in the conversation as you can so the woman feels those sparks of attraction and she wants to impress you, she wants to be accepted by you.
When you approach it in that way, you’re not going to be in the friend zone. She’s going to want something sexual and romantic to happen between you and her.
1. Don’t act like the guy who is trying to save her from all the bad men out there
An example of this is when a guy meets a girl and she complains and says that she keeps meeting all the wrong guys.
She just wants a nice guy, but she keeps meeting all these horrible guys out there.
They’re all jerks, they’re all assholes.
So, the guy who gets himself friendzoned says something like this,“Yeah, but I’m not like that. If I had a girlfriend, I would treat her nicely. I was raised to treat women with the utmost respect. You should stop going for the type of guys that you’ve been going for. You deserve to be treated better. There are so many nice guys out there. I’m one of them. If I was your boyfriend, I would treat you with the respect that you deserve.”
He then gets friendzoned because the woman sees that he is trying to establish a relationship with her based on an offer to treat her nicer than other guys have.
Yet, that’s not how it works.
If it did, men would have to compete with each other over who could treat the woman nicer.
The way that it actually works is very simple and easy for the man.
To make a woman have a sexual and romantic interest, a man doesn’t have to offer anything other than making her feel sparks of sexual attraction for him as he interacts with her.
You will have seen that all the time when a guy starts interacting with a woman and makes sparks fly between him and her right away, she is then interested in him in a sexual way and he can connect with her and then take things to the next level with her.
It’s simple, easy and straightforward.
However, if a guy doesn’t create a spark of attraction and is instead trying to communicate to her that he can save her from all the bad men out there, he might be able to get a chance with a woman if she’s on the rebound after a breakup so she can feel better about herself.
Yet, once she realizes that the relationship has no spark, she’ll break up with him.
If a woman has had some experience with that type of relationship, then she’ll begin to friendzone guys who seem like they would be very similar.
She will know that the majority of guys who portray themselves as being nicer than other guys are usually doing that because they don’t know what else to offer a woman.
After all, she is saying that she wants a nice guy, so the guy takes her literally.
She said that she just wants a nice guy, but keeps meeting horrible guys who are jerks and assholes.
So, he figures that she will like him if he can just show her how nice he is and how he would treat her so well in a relationship.
Yet, offering to be nicer than other guys isn’t the way to get a woman to want to be with you sexually and romantically.
What works is when you create a spark of sexual attraction as you talk to her so she actually sees you in a sexual way and begins to have romantic feelings for you.
So, if a guy wants to avoid the friend zone, he needs to make sure that he doesn’t try to act like he’s going to be a woman’s savior from all the bad men out there.
Instead, let the spark that you create make her really want to be with you.
If you’re a good man who will treat her well and you are the type of man who will make her want to treat you well in return, then she is going to be happy that she has finally met a good man who she feels a real spark for and can build a real relationship with that will last for life.
3. Get to a kiss as soon as possible
A mistake that a guy will often make in this particular area, is that he’ll make a woman feel attracted to him and then he’ll connect with her for 30 minutes or for hours and he won’t make any moves to kiss her.
Alternatively, a guy might use the approach where he tries to get to know a woman over weeks and months and nothing ever develops.
He doesn’t make any moves and they don’t end up kissing and having sex.
So, she doesn’t really know where she stands with him.
She may come to the conclusion that he isn’t confident enough to make a move, or she may be a bit insecure and not know that he does really want her in that way.
So, what she may do in that situation is start to play hard to get to see if she can get him chasing her; to see if she can get him worried that he’s losing his chance with her.
Yet, if he then starts to panic and worry that he’s losing his chance with her and starts trying really hard to make sure that she doesn’t lose interest, then he comes across as desperate, he comes across as insecure and she does lose interest.
She ends up placing him in the friend zone.
So, what you need to understand about today’s dating scene, is that the first kiss usually happens on the first night, first date, second date or at the latest, third date.
Most women are happy to kiss very early on to see how they feel with you.
Is there a real spark between you and her and is the spark strong enough to begin an actual relationship?
So, if you’re talking to a woman, she’s feeling attracted to you and she’s feeling connected with you, then start to make a move.
Initiate the first kiss.
Make it happen.
Once you’ve kissed, then you’re out of the friend zone and the next step is sex, which usually happens right away.
If it doesn’t happen right away, the next date or the next.
No problem, but don’t avoid the first kiss.
The first kiss is the first step to a sexual, romantic relationship and if a woman is feeling attracted to you and connected with you, then she’s going to want the first kiss to happen.
So, go ahead and enjoy yourself.
Learn More?
Okay, I hope you enjoyed this video and learned something from it.
If you are one of the guys who find it difficult to attract women so you can get laid or get yourself a quality girlfriend, or you find it difficult to smoothly transition from a conversation to touching and then kissing and sex, then I recommend that you read my eBook, The Flow, or listen to the audiobook version, The Flow on Audio.
The Flow is everything that you need to know to go from hello to sex with a woman that you find attractive.
It includes exactly what to say to start conversations with women, make them feel attracted to you immediately, build on the attraction, keep the conversation going and keep it interesting, make the woman feel invested and want to contribute to the conversation with you, make her want the first kiss to happen, initiate touch with her in a way that she wants and welcomes.
How to get to the first kiss, get a number, set up a date and have sex on the date.
Alternatively, kiss and have sex on the first night that you meet her.
You can wait to the first, second or third date if you want to.
The choice is yours.
When you use The Flow, everything flows from one step to the next with women that you find attractive.
Most Guys Will Never Know This
One final point that I want to make for you in this video, is to remind you to flip the script when you’re talking to women that you find attractive and you want to have a sexual relationship with.
Remember: It’s either going to be you or her who is going to take on the position as the one who is doing the judging.
As long as you do it in a playful way, women love it.
Most guys will never know that and as a result, their interactions with women will require a lot of work, sucking up, listening, getting to know the woman and then, maybe, she might give him a chance if he’s lucky.
That’s a horrible way to approach your dating life with women.
It’s much more fun and effective for you to take on the role of the one who is doing the judging and have her feel attracted and enjoy the interaction with you, than it is to have her take on the role as the one who is judging and then you’ve got to try to jump through all of her hoops, impress her and hopefully get her to like you as a person.
So, don’t put yourself in the position where you’re hoping to be accepted by a woman.
Instead, make her feel sparks of attraction for you when you’re interacting with her and make her feel like she needs to be accepted and liked by you.
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