Here are 5 ways to make an ex woman realize that she does love you, so you can then get her back:
1. Interact with her and make her feel rushes of romantic and sexual attraction for you
A natural reaction to getting broken up with that many guys have, is to want to close themselves off from all interactions (especially with their ex) and try to cope with the pain and loss.
As a result, they withdraw into themselves and focus on how much they miss her, how sad they feel without her and how badly they just want to make things right so that they can get her back.
Unfortunately, that behavior doesn’t actually yield any results.
In fact, if anything, wallowing in sadness and despair is usually a sure-fire way to turn an ex (and other women as well) off even more (i.e. because emotional weakness is unattractive to women).
So, if you want to make your ex realize that she does love you, avoiding her or falling into a downward spiral of hopelessness is not the way to go about it.
Instead, you need to stay in her life (e.g. via text, social media, and especially on the phone and by seeing her in person) and begin re-sparking her sexual and romantic feelings for you, so that she begins to doubt her decision to break up with you.
For example: Some of the ways you can do that are by…
- Using humor to diffuse the tension between you and her and make her begin seeing you in a more positive light.
- Maintaining your confidence with her regardless of what she says or does to put you off, (e.g. she says things like, “You need to accept that I don’t love you anymore” or, “My feelings for you are dead,” she blames you for ruining the relationship, she acts cold and detached).
- Showing her via your attitude, conversation style, actions and behavior that you’ve changed and improved in some of the ways that are important to her, (e.g. you’re more assertive now rather than being submissive or timid, you’re more emotionally independent rather than being needy or clingy, you’re more emotionally masculine rather than being unmanly).
- Being more emotionally dominant with her, rather than allowing her to call all the shots because you’re afraid she won’t like it and then refuse to give you another chance.
- Reacting differently to the way she expects you to, (e.g. if you used to get jealous every time she mentioned another guy, you now just remain calm and laugh at your past behavior).
- Flirting with her and making her feel like a sexy, desirable woman when she’s around you, rather than being too nice and neutral and not making her feel anything at all.
The more your ex interacts with you and discovers that you’re nothing like the man she broke up with, the more her feelings of respect and attraction for you will be reactivated.
As a result, her defenses start to come down and she then becomes more open to admitting to herself that she really does love you.
When she realizes that, her defenses come down and she starts to want you back.
Another example of how to make your ex realize that she does love you is…
2. Stop trying to get her to understand how much you love her and how much she means to you
One of the most common ways that a guy might try to make his ex change her mind about breaking up with him is by telling her how much he still loves her.
For example: A guy might say something along the lines of, “I know things seem hopeless right now, but I feel it in my heart that we are meant to be together. The truth is, I still love you so much! I don’t want any other woman. I just want you! You mean the world to me and I’m willing to do whatever it takes to prove it to you and get you back. You make me feel amazing and even though right now we’re broken up, I honestly believe that it’s just a temporary setback. We just need to iron out some of our problems and everything will be fine between us. I’m sure of it. I love you! That has to be worth something, right?”
Essentially, he’s hoping that if he opens up to his ex and expresses his feelings to her, it will wipe out all the negative things between them and make her open back up to him too.
She will then say something like, “You’re right! Our love is stronger than our problems! I’m so glad you told me that you love me. It made me realize that I love you too! Let’s get back together again,” and they can then live happily ever after.
Although that’s exactly what would happen in a romantic movie, in real life, things almost never work out that way. Why?
While you’re expressing your feelings to your ex, you’re overlooking one important thing: Her feelings.
To get your ex to drop her guard and open back up to you again, the only thing that matters is how you make her feel.
How much you love her and care for her is pretty much irrelevant and unimportant to her now.
She cares about herself and what she wants and will only start to care about you and what you want, if you first reactivate her feelings of respect and sexual attraction for you.
So, while you’re thinking about how much you love her and how desperately you want to make her realize that she does love you too, she’s usually thinking about all the ways she feels you stuffed up and how that made her feel (e.g. angry, disappointed, frustrated, stuck).
She then zones in on those negative feelings to help her get over you and move on.
This is why, if you truly want to make her realize that she does still love you and get her back, you first have to make her feelings match up to your feelings.
It can’t be you thinking, “I love her. I want her back” and her thinking, “I need to forget him and find someone else” or, “He’s so annoying. I wish he’d stop pestering me to give him another chance.”
In other words, you need to make her feel the way that you feel about her, before anything will happen.
So, don’t bother trying to get her to understand how much you love her and how much she means to you.
Instead, use interactions to make her feel good about talking to you and being around you again.
When you re-spark her feelings for you, her guard will naturally come down.
She then becomes open to admitting that she does love you too.
However, if you focus on your feelings for her without reactivating her feelings for you first, she’s likely just going to push you away and say things like, “I’m sorry that you still have such strong feelings for me. Unfortunately, I don’t feel the same way about you and nothing you say is going to change that. Please accept it and let me go.”
Another example of how to make your ex realize that she does love you is…
3. Be more of a challenge for her
Sometimes, to get his ex to admit that she still has feelings for him, a guy might put on his best behavior around her and act like a nice, sweet, dependable guy.
Essentially, he’s hoping that she will think something along the lines of, “I can’t believe how sweet he is. No matter how cold or rude or even bitchy I am towards him, he just smiles a takes it. He’s so amazing! I never realized it before but he’s the nicest, most agreeable man I’ve ever known. I see now that I really do still love him and I’d be a fool to let him go.”
She will then want him back and he will be happy again.
Yet, what a guy like that doesn’t realize is that a woman doesn’t want to feel as though she is more valuable than him and like she has power over him.
She wants him to make her feel as though she needs to be on her best behavior around him and chase after him because the idea of losing him for real makes her feel stressed out.
Here’s the thing…
A woman wants to feel that her man is a catch, not like she’s doing him a favor by being with him.
She might pretend that she likes a guy who is nice and sweet and who is willing to run around after her and follow her orders like a puppet, but she’s not going to respect him if he actually falls for it and submits to her demands, regardless of how ridiculous she is being.
So, if you want your ex to reconnect with her feelings of love for you, be a bit more of a challenge to her during interactions, rather than being a good little boy who never says or does anything to upset her.
You’d be surprised to see how effective standing up to a woman can be in making her reconnect to her feelings of respect, attraction and love for you again.
Another example of how to make your ex realize that she does love you is…
4. Use humor when she is being cold, rude or mean
One of the best ways to spark a woman’s feelings for you and make her open up to her feelings of love for you is by using humor.
When you focus on making her smile, laugh, and feel good every time you interact with her (e.g. via text, social media and especially over the phone and on person), it makes it very difficult for her to hang on to her angry, negative feelings about you.
For example: Imagine that you’re talking to your ex on the phone and she’s being cold, unfriendly and saying things like, “What do you want? Why do you keep calling me when I’ve made it clear to you that it’s over between us? What must I do to prove to you that I no longer have any feelings for you?”
Hearing her say things like that to you can easily make you feel despondent and like you don’t stand a chance with her anymore.
You might even want to defend yourself by saying something like, “Please don’t say that. All I’m asking for a chance to make things right between us. Please just listen to me…”
Yet, by responding like that, you will miss out on the opportunity to use her negativity as a way of sparking her feelings again and at the same time, gaining back her respect for handling her bitchiness so well.
So, what would be a better way to handle the situation if your ex says something like, “What do you want? Why do you keep calling me when I’ve made it clear to you that it’s over between us? What must I do to prove to you that I no longer have any feelings for you?”
You might respond to her by saying something along the lines of, “Okay, fine. The only way I’ll believe that you no longer have feelings for me is if you invite me to your house and cook me dinner. Only then, will I be convinced that it’s over between us.”
She will likely sound confused or annoyed and say something like, “What? How is that going to prove anything?”
You can then say in a joking way, “We both know you can’t cook. So if you cook dinner for me, I’ll take it as a sign that you’re truly trying to kill me off,” and have a laugh with her about that.
She will most-likely laugh, or at least smile at how you handled her bitchy attitude in a confident, yet humorous way.
By the way…
It doesn’t matter if what you’re saying is true or not.
If it is true and her cooking is really terrible, she will laugh because she will realize that you know her so well.
On the other hand, if her cooking is great, she will know that you’re teasing her.
In either case, she will almost certainly feel curious about your newfound relaxed, confident attitude towards her, which will naturally spark some of her feelings of respect and attraction for you.
When that happens, her resistance begins to crumble and she opens herself up to the idea of talking to you over the phone and meeting up with you in person to see how things go.
You can then build up her feelings for you during interactions and get her back.
Another example of how to make your ex realize that she does love you is…
5. Re-attract her on a phone call and then don’t contact her for a week
A really great way to re-spark your ex’s feelings for you is by calling her on the phone and making her feel strong surges of respect and attraction for you again.
For example: Some of the ways you can do that are by…
- Using humor to make her laugh, smile and feel relaxed during the call with you and get her to open up to seeing you in person.
Making her feel feminine and girly in contrast to your masculine vibe. - Being assertive and bold, rather than submissive and timid when talking to her.
- Flirting with her to relight the sexual spark inside of her that has been missing for a long time.
- Letting her see (via the way you talk to her and respond to her) that you believe in your attractiveness and value to her by maintaining your confidence when she tries to make you feel insecure and unsure of yourself (e.g. by being cold and aloof towards you, saying things like, “You really need to believe me… I don’t love you anymore and I’m not going to change my mind. You need to accept that!”).
- Showing her that you’ve changed and matured since the break up and are now a new and improved man.
As long as you remain calm, confident and relaxed while you’re talking to her, she won’t be able to stop herself from feeling drawn to you again in a way that feels good to her.
Then, when she sounds really relaxed and open, you can then say something along the lines of, “Well, anyway… it’s been great talking to you again, but I’ve got to get going now. I’ve got to meet someone in about 15 minutes and I’m already running a bit late. Let’s do this again though, okay? I’ll call you again sometime. Take care. Bye,” and then hang up the call after she acknowledges that the call is ending (e.g. she says, “Okay, bye…talk to you soon”).
Then, make sure that you don’t contact her at all, not even to send her a text or social media message, for a week.
Basically, you’re giving her time to miss you and begin thinking things like, “Why isn’t he calling me again when he said that he would? I don’t even know why I care. After all I thought I was over him, but now I’m not so sure. I really miss him. He sounded so different on the phone. I actually want to talk to him again and see what’s changed and different about him. Maybe we can work things out after all.”
You’re also making sure that when you do call her again after a week, she will be so excited to hear from you again, that she will want to say “Yes,” when you suggest a meet up.
You can then meet up with her, fully reactivate her feelings for the new you and make her realize that she does love you and wants to be your girl again.
Make Her Realize That She Does Love You By Avoiding These 3 Mistakes
To make your ex drop her guard and open back up to you again, it’s very important that you approach the ex back process in the correct way.
If you turn her off even more at this crucial time, you will just end up reducing your chances of getting her back quickly.
So make sure you’re not making the following mistakes:
1. Trying to get her to love you by explaining how you feel about her
For your ex to want to get back into a relationship with you, there needs to be mutual feelings between you and her, or at least close to mutual feelings.
It can’t all be about you wanting her back because you love her and need her.
That is one-sided.
So, if you want your ex back, make sure that you focus on re-sparking her feelings for you first, before anything else happens.
Initially, all it usually takes is a spark of respect and she will then start to feel attracted to you again.
When she feels attracted, her walls come down and she opens up to reconnecting with the love as well.
On the other hand, if you just focus on explaining to her how you feel about her, without sparking her feelings first, she’s just going to keep pushing you away and likely thinking things like, “I don’t care how he feels. It’s how I feel that matters to me now and I know that I don’t love him anymore.”
Another mistake to avoid making is…
2. Continually apologizing for his previous mistakes
It’s perfectly fine to apologize for making mistakes in the relationship with your ex.
However, one short, sincere apology is enough.
After apologizing once, it’s much more important to then show her, via your attitude, actions, behavior and the way you respond to her that you’ve changed and improved in some of the ways that are important to her.
When she can see that you’re now at a different level as a man (e.g. more confident and self-assured, more manly, more assertive) it will make her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.
Then, the idea of reconnecting with her feelings of love for you starts to feel like something she may be willing to do.
However, if you just apologize to her repeatedly in the hope that she will suddenly realize that she loves you, you’ll be very disappointed because she will likely just move on without you.
The next mistake to avoid making is…
3. Not realizing that your approach to attraction just doesn’t make her feel like she’s in love with you
If you keep using the same approach with your ex that you’ve been using up to this point (e.g. being really nice and sweet to her, treating her like a friend, letting her call all the shots), she will most likely continue to push you away.
Here’s the thing…
To make your ex want you back, you need to start creating feelings of sexual and romantic attraction inside of her.
It won’t work if she loves you as a person, but isn’t sexually attracted to you.
So, focus on building those feelings inside of her and get her back, without her even realizing she’s falling in love with you all over again.
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