If your ex is currently not responding to your texts, it means that you have turned her off in some way via text.
Don’t worry, you can fix it and get her to start responding to your messages again.
From now on, make sure that you…
1. Don’t Send Her Huge Walls of Text
Many guys send their ex walls of text, telling her all about their feelings.
For example, a guy might text something like:
“I need you to listen and let me explain things to you. You won’t answer my calls, so I’m just going to send this via text…”
He then unloads a huge text that goes on and on and on about his feelings, the mistakes he made, how sorry he is and how much she means to him.
Yet, rather than make a woman think, “Wow, my ex must really still love me. Look at all the long text messages he’s sending me telling me all about his feelings. Surely that means we are meant to be together! It’s a sign! He’s the one! I was wrong to break up with him because I stopped feeling respect, attraction and love for him. How wrong of me. I’m such a bad person. As long as he loves me, what does it matter how I feel? I get it now! It’s all about him and his feelings! Yes! How silly of me to think about myself. We need to be together purely based on the fact that he cares about me so much” she will think something like, “Does he really think that I give a damn about how he feels right now? He just doesn’t get it! I hope he doesn’t expect me to respond to this huge wall of text.”
When a guy uses long texts as a way of communicating his feelings to his ex, it highlights to her that he can’t handle the situation like a real man.
For example: Rather than apologizing to her once, making some attractive adjustments to his thinking and behavior, re-sparking her feelings of respect and attraction for him and guiding her back into a relationship, he hides behind walls of texts and hopes that something makes her think, “Wow! Yes, we need to get back together right now!”
Watch this video to understand what you should do if you actually want to get her back…
Most guys get stuck at the apology and explanation stage of the ex back process and never end up getting their woman back.
What they don’t realize is that when a woman loses respect and attraction for a guy (e.g. because he became very insecure in the relationship) and then breaks up with him, she no longer cares about his feelings and wants to focus on making herself feel good.
So, if you want to get your ex to respond to your texts, make sure that you only text her short messages that will make her smile or laugh.
Focus on making her have feelings, rather than trying to discuss your feelings with her and hope that she takes pity on you or that she reads something in your text and realizes that you are the one.
Your ultimate goal should be to get her on a phone call with you as soon as possible, so you can then re-spark her feelings of respect and attraction for and get her to meet up with you in person.
That’s what works to get a woman back.
Hiding behind texts or hoping that texts will win her back is a failing strategy and almost always results in the woman moving on with another guy and then blocking her ex’s phone number.
Another texting mistake to avoid from now on is…
2. Don’t Ask Her For Another Chance Via Text
Sometimes, a guy might believe that he stands a better chance of getting his ex back, if he explains to her (via text) that he’s figured out where he went wrong and then asks her to give him another chance.
He will think something like, “If I explain that I now understand what I did wrong and that I’ve changed, she will feel understood and then she will be more open to giving me another chance. I have to ask her for another chance. It’s my only shot. She will see that I am sincere and then give me another chance.”
Yet, it rarely, if ever, works.
Why?
If a woman currently has little or no feelings for her ex, getting a text from him saying something like, “I’m so sorry about what happened. I’ve really changed. I’m not that guy anymore. Please will you give me another chance? I miss you” is unlikely to make her think, “Now that you’ve apologized and told me how much you’ve changed, everything is all better again. Of course I’ll give you another chance!”
Instead, because a woman can’t see a guy’s body language, hear the tonality of his voice, or judge his actions and behavior in person or on a phone call, she only has her past experiences with him to judge him on (e.g. he used to be insecure, clingy, controlling or took her for granted).
Based on that, she’ll be thinking something along the lines of, “Does he really think that I’m going to believe he’s changed just because he is saying so via text? I’ve been through this before when we were still together. He would promise me that he’d changed and then always goes back to his old habits later on. Well, this time I’m not falling for it. Besides, he doesn’t even have the balls to talk to me face-to-face and instead sends me a text. That’s definitely not a sign of a guy who has really changed. He’s hiding something.”
Why will she be likely to think in that way?
Simple.
Texts don’t show how you are truly feeling, so they have to be interpreted by the receiver based on their current perception of you.
If she currently thinks of you in a negative way, she’s going to look at your texts in a negative way.
This is why asking your ex for another chance should be done in person and only after you have first reactivated her feelings of respect and attraction for you on a phone call.
3. Don’t Be Emotionally Needy Via Text
Being needy is essentially about focusing on your feelings and needing the other person to understand, reassure you, take pity on you, be gentle with you or support you, before you can feel okay about yourself.
Women hate guys who are like that because it makes a woman feel like she’s with a boy, rather than a man.
Women love men who are happy, confident and forward moving in life with or without her reassurance, support or attention.
This is why it’s important that you don’t communicate in a needy way via text.
Unfortunately, many guys don’t seek help to get their ex woman back until they’ve tried everything they think might work (e.g. begging, pleading, explaining their feelings via text), so they waste a lot of time and end up turning her off even more.
For example: Sometimes, when a woman doesn’t respond to her ex’s texts, he might react by becoming needy and desperate.
He might text her something like, “Why won’t you answer me? Can’t you see that I’m truly sorry for hurting you? Please just reply. I can’t stand your silence. It’s driving me crazy! Please baby, don’t ignore me. I can’t deal with not hearing from you like this.”
He might also tell her how much he loves her and how he needs her back again because without her, his life is meaningless or not worth living.
Yet, rather than make her think, “Look how much he needs me. He’s so loving and committed to me. That’s what matters. I’ve been such a bitch to my ex. It doesn’t matter that he still hasn’t changed. He loves me, which is all that counts. I should get in touch with him and give him another chance,” his behavior usually just makes her lose more respect and attraction for him.
Why?
It’s a woman’s natural instinct to be more attracted to the kind of man who has the emotional strength to cope with the challenges that life throws at him.
So, when a guy is making himself look emotionally weak and needy in her eyes, she feels turned off by him.
Remember: Text her as a way of getting her on a phone call with you, where you can actively spark her feelings of respect and attraction for you by making her laugh, smile and feel good to be interacting with you again.
Then, get her to meet up with you in person.
That is what works.
4. Use Humor to Get Her Smiling and Laughing
One of the biggest mistakes that guys make is being too serious with their ex via text.
For example: A guy might text his ex as a way of having a serious meaningful conversation with her.
He’s hoping that if she notices how serious he is being about getting her back, she will be more willing to talk to him over the phone and even meet up with him in person.
Yet, it usually just makes a woman want to stop texting because it’s just not fun.
So, if you want her to respond to you, don’t waste time trying to have a serious conversation with her.
Instead, focus on making her smile and laugh, so that she begins to think, “This is interesting. He’s funny. I wonder what has gotten into him? Maybe he’s learned his lesson and changed. Maybe I should meet up with him and see what happens.”
When you use humor and get your ex smiling and laughing, it becomes a lot more difficult for her to hold on to her negative feelings about you.
She starts feeling respect and attraction for you again and her guard comes down, making her more open to the idea of talking to you on the phone.
So, don’t be afraid to use a bit of humor to break the ice when you text your ex, especially if she’s currently not responding to your texts.
5. Don’t Instantly Reply to Everything She Sends
Sometimes, a guy will think something like, “If I don’t reply to my ex immediately, she might think that I’m not interested in getting back together again. Even worse, she might decide that I’m being rude to her and she may then stop texting me altogether. I have to reply immediately to show her how much I care and how serious I am about getting her back. I don’t want her to get the impression that I’m moving on without her.”
He will then try to instantly or very quickly respond to every text he gets from his ex.
Yet, what he doesn’t realize is that by making himself so available to her, she is likely thinking, “Why is he responding so quickly? Is he just sitting around waiting for me to text him? Doesn’t he have a life? When does he sleep, or eat, or go out with friends, or go to work? No matter when I text him, he’s always available. That’s just weird.”
So, even if you’re excited that your ex is suddenly texting you back (especially if you’ve been trying to get her to respond to you for a long time), don’t make the classic mistake of instantly replying to every text within seconds or minutes.
For example: If you’re at work, out with friends, or busy in some other way, it’s perfectly okay to get back to her at a later time.
It’s not rude and she’s not going to suddenly stop texting you if you get back to her after an hour.
Instead, she will actually start to want to get your reply and will be wondering what you’re going to say.
This then makes her think about you and imagine that you might be hanging out with friends, a new girl or doing something so interesting that you don’t have time to reply to her.
She then starts to think about you in a positive way and begins to miss you.
However, be warned…
Don’t delay your texts for too long.
Just be natural about it (i.e. reply immediately, after 5 minutes, 30 minutes, an hour or even the next day sometimes).
Keep it natural and don’t try too hard to seem unavailable.
Some texts are fine to reply immediately or quick to (e.g. when you’re chatting), while others can wait (e.g. she asks what you’ve been up to).
6. Keep Your Texts Short and to the Point
If you’re going to get your ex back, it’s most-likely not going to happen via text.
I know that because I’ve personally worked on 100s of ex back cases and what always works is getting the woman on a phone call and then meeting up with her in person.
The guys who struggle to get their ex woman back are those who hide behind text or assume that she wouldn’t want to talk on the phone or meet in person, so they just stick with text.
If you want her back for real, you’re going to need to talk to her on the phone and then meet up with her in person.
However, when you are texting, make sure you keep your texts short and to the point.
Why?
Women hate it when men text like a girl and go on and on about things.
On the other hand, women love it when men have the balls to text short and to the point, while being witty or easy-going about things.
For example:
Her: So, what have you been up to lately?
You: I’m not sure if I should tell you.
Her: What? Why? Tell me.
You: Well, okay, but only over the phone. I don’t want a record of it in writing. Will call you.
Then, call her and joke around about what you’ve been up to.
For example: She asks what you’ve been up to that is so secretive that you can text it and you say, “I was involved in a hit and run accident” and she is then shocked and asks something like, “What? You killed someone or you hurt someone? What happened?”
You then laugh and say, “No, I was just kidding. I just thought I’d mess you with you for a laugh. Anyway, how you’ve been?” and continue on the conversation in a confident, easy-going way, before you suggest catching up in person.
Finally…
7. Don’t Hide Behind Texts. Get to a Phone Call and Meet Up
It’s easy to fall into the habit of texting your ex without ever working up the courage to call her, or see her in person.
You might think that it’s best to take things slowly because you don’t want to scare her off.
You might also hope that when she’s ready, she will tell you that she wants to get back with you.
Yet, a woman will rarely make the first move with her ex, unless she is still truly in love with him or can’t find a better replacement guy to move on with.
Instead, she will wait for him to take the lead in the ex back process and get them back into a relationship together.
If he does, she will know that he is man enough for her, so she will then relax her guard and allow herself to respect him, feel attracted to him and love him again.
On the other hand, if he just hides behind texts, she will gradually lose respect and attraction for him and want to find a real man (rather than a text man) to give her heart to.
So, if you want to get your ex back, don’t think that it’s all going to happen via text.
To get her back, you need to be fearless enough to get her on a phone call with you and then to meet up with you in person.
Remember: A text is just a bunch of words on a screen.
Anyone can type, “I’m sorry,” or “I’ve really changed,” via text, but if a woman can’t hear the tone of your voice, or see your body language, she’s probably just going to assume the worst (i.e. that you’re still the same guy she broke up with).
The most respect and attraction is experienced when a woman talks to you on the phone or in person, not via text.
Regardless of how often you text, or what you text her, nothing that you say in a text message can be powerful enough to convince your ex that you’re no longer the guy she remembers.
So, don’t make the classic ex back mistake of hiding behind texts and then wondering why nothing is happening.
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