If a beautiful woman is insecure or shy, it doesn’t really matter to the majority of men.
Most men will still find her attractive and want to be with her even though she is a bit insecure or shy.
In fact, some guys will find it a bit of a turn on that the beautiful woman is shy and he can be more confident around her.
However, the same doesn’t apply for a woman’s attraction to a man.
Women are attracted to the emotional strengths of men such as confidence, high self-esteem and self-assuredness and turned off by emotional weaknesses such as insecurity, self-doubt and shyness.
What you may have noticed is that confident guys can easily attract women to get laid or get a girlfriend, whereas shy guys have a difficult time getting anywhere past the friend zone.
Some shy guys can get laid or get a girlfriend, but they don’t really have their choice of women because their emotional weakness turns most women off.
The 9 Signs
So, what are some of the signs of insecurity that turn women off and how can you avoid doing it?
1. Unable to maintain eye contact
If a guy is talking to a woman, he doesn’t need to stare at her in the eyes the entire time to maintain eye contact, but he does need to be able to maintain casual eye contact and keep that going for 5 seconds at a time or 10 seconds at a time.
If a guy is talking to a woman and he’s looking away and looking around and looking down and looking uncomfortable, she’s not going to be able to feel attracted to him. Women aren’t attracted to emotional weakness.
2. Being lost for words and then appearing nervous or unsure of himself
One of the main reasons why guys struggle to get laid or get a girlfriend is that they don’t really know what to say to a woman to keep a conversation going and keep it interesting.
A girl will start off a conversation and because he’s feeling so attracted to the woman and feeling unsecure about his value and worthiness to her, he’ll start to think too much and get lost for words.
Suddenly, he’ll begin to appear nervous and unsure of himself and a woman will start to feel turned off.
If a guy is confident and he is able to be present in the conversation as he talks to a woman, he’s not going to be worrying about things in his head.
His brain isn’t going to have to work hard to come up with conversation. It’s just going to flow naturally and effortlessly as though he’s talking to just any other person.
3. Doubting that she could ever like a guy like him
If a guy is talking to a woman and he doubts that she could ever like a guy like him, it’ll come across in the way that he’s talking to her, his body language, how he reacts in response to her and his general approach to the interaction.
For example: If a guy is being over-complimentary and giving her the impression that he would be so lucky if he ever got a chance with her, that is going to turn her off.
A woman definitely does want to be appreciated and treated well, but she doesn’t want a guy who feels like he needs to suck up to her and kiss her ass and hope to get a chance with her if he’s on his very best behavior around her.
4. Communication that lacks confidence
For example: Hesitating to speak, lowering the volume of his voice, nervously giving his opinion.
A lot of this comes back to a guy not having confidence in himself.
If a guy is insecure and doubts his ability to attract women, he will often hesitate when he’s speaking. He might lower the volume of his voice because he’s not quite sure that what he’s saying is cool enough or good enough. Women pick up on these subtle queues and it turns them off because women are not attracted to the emotional weakness of men.
5. Being afraid to express his true personality out of a fear of being judged by her
What a lot of guys do is they put on an act of being nicer than they actually are or want to be in the hope that it will impress a woman.
If a woman notices that a guy is putting on an act and he’s not really presenting his real personality, then her guard goes up because she feels like she’s not interacting with the real version of him. She can’t trust him because he’s not being honest with her.
He’s trying to win her over with a fake version of his personality.
6. Giving his power to her
For example:
He goes along with whatever she wants to do.
He lowers his social status to hopefully gain her pity.
Feels like she needs to say “yes” or “no” to give him a chance to be with her, so he’d better be in his best behavior otherwise she’s going to say “no.”
He doesn’t realize that all he needs to do is actively make her feel sexually attracted to him during a conversation and the games will begin to stop. Her guard will come down, she will open up, she will feel a spark with him and she’ll be interested to see where it goes.
7. Trying to impress her by talking about his achievements or possessions
If the subject of a guy’s achievements or material possessions comes up in a conversation, there’s nothing wrong with him talking about that in a relaxed, easy-going way.
However, if a guy is talking to a woman and starts boasting or bragging, or talking about what he wants to achieve, or what he has achieved, a woman can tell if the real reason why he’s saying it is due to insecurity.
If the woman feels like the guy doesn’t think that he’s good enough for her and thinks that he needs to put on an act and really impress her to get a chance with her, it usually causes her to start playing hard to get.
Suddenly, she starts to feel like, “Hang on…maybe I am way better than him. Maybe he doesn’t deserve me. Going out with him kind of feels like I’d be doing a favor to him.”
If she starts to feel that way about him, she won’t really be able to respect him or feel attracted to him.
8. Displaying tense or nervous body language
For example: Appearing concerned or worried that she could lose interest at any moment, having a tense look on his face or maintaining concerned eye contact.
9. Being unable to pass her simple confidence tests
Some women are a lot easier to interact with and pick up than others, but pretty much all women put men through confidence tests.
A woman wants to test a guy’s confidence to see if he’s emotionally strong or not.
If she tests him by playing hard to get or not contributing much to the conversation and notices that he suddenly starts doubting himself, looking nervous and feeling insecure, her primal instinct of attraction goes off because women are not attracted to emotional weakness in men.
What a lot of guys don’t know is that being confident around women and attracting women is very easy to do.
The Confidence Solution You’ve Been Looking For
If you don’t know how to be confident around women and you don’t know what to say or do to make them feel attracted to you, I recommend that you read my eBook, The Flow, or listen to the audio version, The Flow on Audio.
The Flow is the easiest way to get laid or get a girlfriend. When you read The Flow or listen to the audio version (The Flow on Audio), you will instantly become more confident and you will also know how to maintain that confidence when you interact with women.
When you interact with a woman and you display confidence, she is going to naturally feel attracted to you. She doesn’t have to think about it, she doesn’t have to analyze it, it just happens automatically.
You will notice that she feels attracted to you and that will boost your confidence even further.
It’s a positive confidence building cycle that just gets stronger and stronger every day of your life, until you are so confident that you don’t ever have to think about it again.
You are confident all the time around women, no matter how beautiful or challenging they are…and they like it.
You Control the Attraction
Most guys don’t know that they have a lot of direct control over how much or little attraction a woman feels for them.
A lot of guys woke up to women and then hope that something happens magically. “I hope that she likes me. I hope that there’s something between us,” but the guy doesn’t actually know how to create that spark.
He’s just hoping that it happens.
What guys don’t realize is that you can CREATE the spark.
You can actively create a spark of attraction between you and a woman.
One of the easiest ways to do that is to be confident when you’re talking to a woman as well as displaying other personality traits that naturally make women feel sexually attracted.
For example: Charisma, charm, humor and social intelligence.
It’s very easy to display those traits when you’re talking to a woman, to create a spark and then build on that spark.
If you don’t know how to do that, I recommend that you read my eBook, The Flow, or listen to the audiobook version, The Flow on Audio.
When you read The Flow or listen to the audio version, you’ll learn exactly what to say and do to make women feel naturally attracted to you.
You’ll feel so much more confident and you’ll know how to maintain and build on that confidence from now on.
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