If you’re breaking up because she is moving away and you want to keep her, here’s how to do it.
Here are 4 ways to make her want to keep a long distance relationship going with you after she moves away:
1. Tell her that you accept the break up, so she doesn’t feel like she is being forced into wanting a long distance relationship
For example: You might say something along the lines of, “Although I really do care for you and would have preferred that we stay together, I understand that you need to make this move. So, I want you to know that I completely accept the break up and wish you everything of the best. I’ve stopped wishing that things could be different or that you would change your mind about moving. We can now both move on and be happy, without any hard feelings. However, that doesn’t mean we can’t still be friends. We can still text, talk on the phone and maybe even video chat from time to time and when you’re back in town, we can catch up over a cup of coffee too. It will be fun.”
By saying that to her, you’re letting her know that you’re being an emotionally strong and mature man.
Not only does this take the pressure off her to stay in a long distance relationship with you, it also boosts her feelings of respect for you as a man.
As a result, she will then begin to feel strong surges of sexual attraction and love for you and will start to feel the pain of losing you.
She will then naturally begin to consider the possibility of staying in a relationship with you after all, even though she’s moving away.
Another thing you can do to make her want to keep a long distance relationship going with you after she moves away is to…
2. Start attracting her in new and exciting ways before she moves away
Sometimes, when a guy is forced to break up with his girl because she’s moving away, to appear cool about it, he might put on an act of not caring.
He may then start behaving in a neutral way around her (i.e. like he doesn’t care one way or another if she leaves).
Yet, that only ruins his chances of staying in a relationship with her, because she likely starts thinking things like, “Well I guess this move was a good thing after all, seeing as he already seems to be over me.”
Alternatively, if a guy interacts with his girl while feeling sad, dejected or unsure about his value to her, it will come across in the tonality of his voice, his body language and the way he responds to her every time she talks about the move.
Then, because women aren’t sexually attracted to emotional weakness like that, she will decide that he’s just not man enough for her and will be happy that she’s moving away.
This is why, if you want to prevent your woman from thinking like that about you, you need to make sure you continue to make her feel attracted every time you interact with her (i.e. over the phone or in person).
For example: Some of the ways you can do that is by…
- Maintaining your confidence around her regardless of how happy or excited she sounds about moving.
- Using ballsy humor to lighten the mood between you and her, especially when she’s feeling sad, depressed or overwhelmed by all the changes in her life.
- Being there for her during this transition, while still getting on with your own life (e.g. going out with friends, pursuing your own hobbies and interests, focusing on your goals and dreams).
- Being more manly in how you think, behave, talk and act around her so she feels totally feminine and girly when she’s with you.
- Continuing to flirt with her so that she can’t stop thinking about you when you’re apart.
The more attracted you make her feel in new and interesting ways, the more convinced she’ll become that breaking up because of moving isn’t what she wants to do.
Another thing you can do to make her want to keep a long distance relationship going with you after she moves away is to…
3. Be more confident and manly in the bedroom all of a sudden
Rather than just having the same, comfortable sex you and her have been having all along, become bolder with her.
After all, you have nothing to lose and the more sexually aroused you make her feel, the more unforgettable you will be to her.
So, focus on having the confidence to take things to a different level with her.
For example:
- Take longer with foreplay and build up the sexual tension by kissing, touching, teasing and playfulness.
- Try something that you’ve never tried before (e.g. a different position, building her up and then pulling away just before she climaxes and then starting all over again).
- Don’t think about her moving away and focus instead on being present in the moment (i.e. When you are present, you respond to what she wants in the moment, not to what you already know she likes).
- Focus on giving her pleasure, while at the same time enjoying the moment for yourself.
Make it an experience that she won’t be able to stop thinking about.
Another thing you can do to make her want to keep a long distance relationship going with you after she moves away is to…
4. Let her see that you are now emotionally independent of her
Even if a woman is unhappy about having to break up with her guy because she’s moving away, the last thing she usually wants at a time like that is for him to become clingy, needy and emotional.
For example: If a guy starts saying things like, “I don’t want to lose you! What will I do without you in my life? You mean everything to me and without you I will be lost. Can’t we try and make things work long distance?” rather than make a woman feel flattered by his dedication to her, it will often make her pull away from him. Why?
A woman wants to be with a man who is happy, confident and forward moving in his life, with or without her support, approval or attention.
She doesn’t want to feel as though he will fall apart without her presence in his life.
If she gets a sense that he won’t be able to cope without her, she may begin thinking things like, “Now that I know he’s not as confident and emotionally strong and independent as I thought he was, I don’t feel attracted to him anymore. Maybe this move is for the best after all.”
That’s not what you want.
This is why you need to let her see that you are happy, confident and moving forward in life and you don’t need her to feel emotionally fulfilled.
Of course, you really do want her to stay in a relationship with you, but you must get to the point where you don’t actually need that to happen in order for you to feel content.
By not acting like a needy guy around her and instead, you let her see that you’re confident in yourself with or without her in your life, something interesting happens…
You become even more attractive to her.
Suddenly, she starts to see you as being more of a catch than you were before, so the idea of losing you begins to bother her a lot.
She might then say something along the lines of, “If you’re willing, I’d like to try having a long distance relationship after all. Like you said, we can text, call, chat on social media and maybe even visit each other once in a while. I know it won’t be easy, but I don’t want to lose you!”
Where Guys Go Wrong When Breaking Up With a Woman Because She’s Moving
Your woman is likely under a lot of stress at the moment, so making things worse for her will only make it easier for her to cut you out of her life and try to make a clean start in her new town, city or country.
So, if you don’t want that to happen, make sure you don’t make the following attraction mistakes:
1. Crying with her about the break up
There’s no denying that things can get tough sometimes and it’s only normal that having to break up because of moving can make a guy feel like life is being unfair to him.
It’s also understandable that he might feel upset and may want to vent his frustration by talking about it with his woman.
That’s totally fine.
Yet, what isn’t fine is him falling apart and crying about the break up to her.
Not only is that unfair to her, because she now has to be the strong one that consoles him, rather than the other way around, it also ruins her feelings for him.
Suddenly she starts to see him with new eyes and she may then begin to think things like, “I never saw this side of him before, but he’s not as emotionally strong as I thought. In fact, he’s quite wimpy and needy. Maybe this move isn’t a bad thing after all. Maybe it’s time that I made a fresh start and found myself a new guy who is emotionally mature and strong like a man.”
Here’s the thing…
In order for your woman to maintain her feelings of respect and attraction for you, she needs to be able to see that, no matter difficult things get, you’re man enough to remain mentally strong and in control of your emotions.
So, if your start crying to her about the move, you’re likely just going to turn her off and make it easier for her to say “Goodbye.”
Another mistake to avoid making is…
2. Promising to never forget each other and always stay in touch, rather than creating attraction by being more of a challenge for her
A guy might sometimes think that being soppy and emotional and saying things like, “I’ll never forget you. No matter how far apart we are, I will always be thinking of you and remembering all the good times we shared together,” will make his woman feel flattered and maybe convince her to stay loyal to him, even though they’re no longer together.
He doesn’t realize that, although she might feel pleased that he still cares about her, she’s also going to start feeling like she can push him around and not even bother doing anything to keep him interested in her.
Essentially, he’s making it too easy for her to feel like she has control over him by not being much of a challenge to her.
As a result she loses interest.
So, if you want to maintain your woman’s feelings of respect and attraction for you, be a bit more of a challenge to her (e.g. by being emotionally independent and focusing on getting on with your life without her), rather than giving her the impression that you can’t cope without her.
You’d be amazed at how quickly the tables will turn and she will then be the one telling you how she won’t forget you.
Another mistake to avoid making is…
3. Begging and pleading with her to stay
As tempting as it might be to want to say things like, “I can’t bear the thought of losing you. Please don’t go! I beg you,” don’t do it.
Although you likely mean well and you’re only saying what’s on your mind, begging and pleading simply turns a woman off even more and makes her feel like she’s making the right decision by moving away from you.
Why?
Women are not attracted to the emotional weakness in men (e.g. neediness, desperation, clinginess, an inability to handle what life throws at him).
So, when a guy begs and pleads with a woman to stay, not only does she feel turned off by what she perceives as his emotional weakness, she likely also feels annoyed with him for expecting her to change her whole life just because he can’t cope.
Another mistake to avoid making is…
4. Suggesting that he could move to where she is going
In some instances, a guy might offer to go with his woman to wherever she’s moving.
In his mind he’s likely thinking that she will be happy that he’s willing to make such a sacrifice for her.
Yet, in most cases, the opposite is true.
Rather than feel excited about his offer, a woman will usually feel like he’s smothering her by not allowing her to do what she set out to do on her own.
At the same time, a woman wants to be the one who asks her guy to go with her because she needs him, not the other way around.
So, when he’s being desperate, her instincts naturally cause her to start thinking things like, “I can’t believe he’s being so clingy and needy. He doesn’t have the emotional strength required to make me feel protected and safe in a relationship. It’s a good thing that I’m moving after all.”
She might then say something along the lines of, “No. Let me go first. Then, when I’ve settled down, we can discuss you moving too,” as a way of letting him down easy.
Another mistake to avoid making is…
5. Turning her off while he still has a chance to interact with her
Although breaking up because of moving sucks, you need to stay in control of your emotions.
If you don’t and instead start behaving in unattractive ways (e.g. being whiny and negative, refusing to do any fun things with her anymore because you think it’s a waste of time, you get angry with her for moving), you’re going to end up ruining her feelings for you.
She will then go away with little to no feelings for you anymore, so it’s easier for her to move on and make a fresh start.
So, if you want to save your relationship with her, you need to focus on making her last few days/week/months with you so memorable, that her feelings for you get even stronger.
In that way, she might even decide to stay and if not, she definitely won’t be able to forget you and she may then suggest that you and her take a shot at having a long distance relationship for a while.
As you can see, moving does not necessarily have to signal the end of a relationship.
In fact, it can actually be the beginning of something even better.
The choice is yours.
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