Sometimes a couple needs to temporarily break up for one or both of the people to feel motivated enough to change, improve and finally fix the relationship and make it work.
Of course, sometimes a temporary breakup turns into a permanent one, but here are 11 examples of how a temporary breakup can result in a couple getting back together, staying together and being happier than before:
1. When the woman breaks up with the man to hopefully get him to treat her better
She hopes the breakup will shock him into changing and being more of the man she wants him to be (e.g. more loving, attentive and devoted to her, less neglectful or indifferent).
If he realizes his mistake and quickly adjusts his approach to her, they will usually get back together and the relationship will be better than it was before.
Therefore, they will have broken up to be able to stay together and make the relationship work.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t always go that though.
Sometimes a guy will go overboard when trying to prove how sorry he is for taking her for granted, or not treating her well enough.
He will go from being a bit neglectful of her, to suddenly being very nice, considerate and generous towards her.
He will end up treating her way too well, to the point where she sees him as desperate.
She will then lose interest in being with him because women aren’t attracted to desperation in men.
What should you do instead?
Understand that a woman does want a man who treats her well and makes her feel loved and appreciated.
However, she doesn’t want him to lose the coolness and emotional strength that attracted her to him in the first place, just so he can get another chance with her.
She also doesn’t want to feel like he’s acting nicer when he really doesn’t want to be, just so he can temporarily get her back and not have to deal with the pain of being dumped.
This is why you need to make sure that you use a balanced approach when getting your ex back.
Yes, treat her well, but also remember to maintain the cool, confident, manly side of yourself that attracted her to you in the past.
Don’t become a soft, wimpy guy who sucks up to her and hopes that she takes pity on you.
Women aren’t attracted to desperation like that.
Use a balanced approach and you will be one of the couples who broke up to stay together.
Another example of how breaking up to stay together can work, is…
2. When the man breaks up to make the woman treat him better
Breaking up with a woman who has been behaving badly and been unloving for too long, can work if she still feels very attracted to the guy.
She will feel the loss, rejection and shock and it will almost always cause her to want to treat him better to get another chance, so the pain will then stop.
However, there are also times when it doesn’t work.
For example: If a woman doesn’t feel much or any attraction for a guy, or fell out of love with him a long time ago, she usually won’t be hurting enough to want to get him back after being dumped.
She may even have wanted to break up with him for a while and been wondering how or when to do it, so him dumping her comes as a relief to her.
She then focuses on moving on and finding a new man to fall in love with, rather than getting back with an ex she no longer has feelings for.
It also doesn’t work when she realizes that the relationship was too problematic and she feels better and happier without him.
In cases like that, she will just focus on moving on and his plan to shock her into treating him better will have backfired.
He still can get her back, but he’ll need to ensure that he doesn’t become desperate and plead with her.
To get a woman back, you always have to focus on displaying the personality traits and behaviors that naturally attract women (e.g. confidence, humor, masculinity, charm, charisma, flirting, being a playful challenge).
As long as you are being attractive, she will feel sparks and will naturally feel drawn back to you.
3. When the couple agrees to break up for a week to give them a chance to miss each other
A little bit of space will often relight the spark between a man and woman and make them want to get back together.
That usually happens if a couple does still care for each other, but has grown bored of the relationship.
The week apart allows them to realize how much they miss each other and conclude that life really does feel better together, than it does apart.
So, it then becomes a situation where they break up in order to reunite and stay together as a couple.
Yet, it doesn’t always work out that way.
For example: If the woman is the one who feels bored or has lost attraction for the guy and is asking for a break, she usually won’t have any intention of getting back with him.
The break will be her way of getting out of the relationship without having to dump him on the spot and deal with the potential consequences (e.g. him crying, begging for another chance, or potentially becoming angry).
During the week of space, she will focus on moving on and finding a new guy to date and start sleeping with, so she can then tell her ex, “Sorry, I’ve met someone else” when he reaches out after a week.
In some cases, the woman will already have another guy lined up and ready to go because she will have been flirting with him for weeks or months prior.
4. When a couple has no idea how to fix their problems and needs a little time to reflect
Sometimes a couple struggles to stop arguing, fighting or disagreeing with each other all the time.
No matter how hard they try, they always end up feeling angry, annoyed or resentful towards one another about something.
As a result, the relationship becomes a stressful, unhappy thing for them to be a part of, rather than being a relaxing, comfortable, happy part of their life.
In a case like that, a week apart can give the couple time to reflect on their mistakes and figure out how to do things differently.
If they come up with a better approach that works, then the breakup will have been beneficial and will help them stay together as a couple from then on.
Yet, it doesn’t always work.
For example: Sometimes one or both of them assume that all the relationship problems are the other person’s fault and they don’t need to change or improve anything about themselves.
So, after a week of space, nothing changes and they end up fighting and arguing about the same kind of things over and over again, until one of them gets fed up and ends the relationship for real.
It also doesn’t work when one, or both of them don’t understand what to change, or end up changing things that aren’t important to the other person (e.g. the guy focuses on being more romantic when what his woman really wants is for him to be more manly, or playfully challenging).
5. When one of them cheats, but they still want to be together
Cheating is one of the most common reasons for a divorce, or breakup.
However, it still is possible to make a relationship work after cheating occurs.
For example: If…
- It truly was a mistake (e.g. the person simply had too much to drink and stopped thinking clearly).
- The person who cheated has a good character, sincerely regrets their behavior and promises to never do it again. There’s no guarantee that it won’t ever happen again, but if a person truly, sincerely believes that they wouldn’t ever want to cheat again, it is often worth giving them a chance to prove it.
- The one who was cheated on forgives the cheater and is able to trust them again.
- They really do love each other and are willing to work on the relationship, rather than walking away and regretting it in the future.
- The attraction between them is strong enough to not care about the cheating and just get back together as a couple.
That said, it’s not always possible to get back together after cheating.
For example: Sometimes a woman will cheat on a guy and he’ll want her back, but he won’t know how to handle his emotions and will become insecure, clingy, needy or potentially even angry and aggressive towards her.
As a result, she will want to get away with him, rather than getting back together.
Alternatively, if a guy cheats on a woman, gets dumped and then tries to get her back by crying, begging, pleading and apologizing way too much, she will feel turned off by his desperation and emotional weakness.
She will then feel more compelled to move on and the breakup won’t result in them getting back together.
6. When one person doesn’t feel ready to commit
Getting dumped can sometimes be the wake-up call a person needs to realize that they are in love and do want to be in a committed relationship with the other person.
As a result, they get back together and feel more motivated to level up their commitment (e.g. move in together, get engaged or married, have a child).
However, breaking up to encourage commitment doesn’t always work.
For example: If a guy breaks up with a woman to hopefully get her to commit to him further, but she doesn’t feel much love or attraction for him, she won’t feel very motivated to get him back.
Instead, she will realize that she doesn’t feel much for him and it’s probably a good opportunity for her to start dating new men, to hopefully find one who she truly loves and wants to be with.
As a result, his plan to get her to commit backfires and she happily moves on without him.
Another example is where a woman breaks up with a guy who hasn’t committed to her, but she isn’t doing it to get him to commit.
Instead, she’s worried about wasting more of her youthful attractiveness on a guy who she feels isn’t the one for her (e.g. because he’s too insecure, lacks manliness in his behavior, doesn’t have much or any ambition).
If he then desperately offers her more commitment (e.g. buys her an engagement ring and proposes), she won’t want to get back with him because a ring isn’t all she is looking for.
She’s looking for real feelings of love and attraction and he just hasn’t been able to offer that to her.
7. When the man levels up his ability to make her feel sparks of sexual and romantic attraction
For example:
- He continues to be the good, loving man she fell in love with, but starts to be more of a challenge, or starts being more assertive, in a loving way. Alternatively, rather than always being so agreeable and letting her have her way, he begins to create a dynamic where she feels more respectful of him and agrees to some of the things he wants as well.
- He no longer loses control of his emotions and gets upset if she becomes moody, or throws a tantrum. Instead, he remains in control of his emotions like a man and doesn’t allow her to throw him off.
- He stops being so neutral towards her and starts being more manly, so she feels more girly in his presence. Alternatively, he uses flirting to create sparks, rather than just having friendly, neutral conversations with her.
Essentially, he offers her a new, improved attraction experience and as a result, she feels drawn to him and compelled to give him another chance.
As a result, the breakup results in them getting back together and potentially staying together if he is able to continue being attractive from then on, rather than reverting back to how he was when she broke up with him.
8. When the time apart allows the couple to understand where the other is coming from
For example: A woman might be annoyed at how her boyfriend works too much, or is too focused on his career or business.
She might see it as him putting his job, career or business ahead of her.
Yet, when they break up, she realizes the benefits of being with a man who is so hardworking and who has a purpose in life, other than his relationship with her.
Suddenly, she appreciates that he’s not a lazy slacker, a guy who just wants a mediocre life, or a guy who would cling to her in a needy way because he lacks purpose in life outside of the relationship.
If he then also realizes that she’s been feeling a bit neglected and genuinely wants to give her more of his time and attention, the relationship will become stronger and better than it was before.
9. When the woman is attracted to the guy, but just needs some time away from him
Sometimes a woman needs a little bit of space like that (e.g. if the relationship seems to be moving too fast, if she’s not sure if she’s ready to settle down, if she’s busy with other things in life).
If the guy backs off and gives her space for a few days to a week, the woman will usually realize that she’s losing a great guy and then want him back.
10. When the breakup forces one or both of them to fix the relationship problems
Sometimes a couple will stick with an unhappy, or boring relationship because neither of them feels motivated to change anything, or go through with a breakup.
So, if they eventually do break up and feel lonely and lost without each other, it can result in one or both of them wanting to understand what went wrong.
One or both of them may then come to the conclusion that the relationship could work if they just fixed, changed or adjusted a few things.
If they meet up and both feel like giving it another try, the breakup will turn out to be a good thing for them because the new relationship will be better and more enjoyable than before.
11. When both of them realize that they were happier in a relationship than trying to deal with the dating scene
Dating isn’t always easy for both men and women.
Here are some results of recent studies on the topic:
- 68.4% of women believe that dating apps make it harder to find love.
- 55% of women believe dating is harder today than it was 10 years ago.
- 60% of unmarried relationships break up within 2 months and 70% end within 1 year.
So, if a couple breaks up and finds it difficult to move on, it can result in one or both of them missing what they once had.
Don’t rely on your ex failing at dating though.
Many women are able to find a new man and move on very easily.
So, if you truly want her back, the best approach is to re-attract her and get her back while you still can.
Make the breakup the thing that brings you and her closer together and more in love than you ever were before.
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