If you want her back and don’t want to be single, you should focus on getting her back.
Yet, if you want to try single life by dating new women before potentially trying to get your ex back, here’s what you can do:
1. Improve your knowledge on what really makes a woman feel attracted to a man, so you can realize how much power and control you have over your dating life
If a guy doesn’t know how to attract women and has essentially been relying on luck to get a chance with women in the past, he will naturally feel lost, lonely and helpless when dumped by a woman he loves.
To stop feeling that way, you need to understand how to easily attract women and make them feel like they’re the lucky ones to get a shot with you.
When you understand how to do that and then do it, you will see that many pretty women find you attractive and want to be with you.
As a result, you no longer feel helpless or needy for your ex, because you can enjoy your choice of women now.
If you’re not sure what attracts women, here are some questions to ask yourself the next time you’re interacting with a pretty woman you like:
- Am I being a bit of a playful challenge to her, so she feels motivated to impress me to maintain my interest, or does she feel she can treat me any way she wants and I’ll just put up with it to hopefully continue talking to her?
- Am I maintaining my confidence when she tries to test the strength of my confidence by being cold, or pretending not to be interested, or am I displaying insecurity, nervousness, and self-doubt?
- Am I making her feel turned on (e.g. by flirting with her, using ballsy humor), or is she feeling friendly, non-sexual feelings, nothing at all or even turned off (i.e. because I’m being too polite, serious or neutral with her)?
- Do I believe in myself and in my value to her, or do I feel like she’s out of my league and I’d be lucky to get a chance with her?
If you are doing what is listed in the first part of the questions above, you will be attractive to her.
If you’re doing what is listed in the second part of the questions above, you won’t be attractive to her.
It’s as simple as that.
The only thing you can do other than being attractive (based on your behavior and approach to the interaction) is to hope to get lucky.
Yet, if you just rely on getting lucky, you will rarely, if ever, get the girl you really want and if you do, you will always know that you got her by luck.
As a result, you will naturally feel insecure, needy, clingy and protective of her because you will know that if she meets a guy who actually knows how to attract women on purpose, she will almost certainly like him a lot more than you and possibly cheat, or break up with you to be with him instead.
This is why, as a man, it’s essential that you understand how to attract women at will, or on purpose.
When you have that ability and then interact with your ex, she will naturally feel so much more attracted to you than she ever did in the past.
She will realize that if she got back into a relationship with you now, it would feel even better than it did in the past.
As a result, she opens up to you and you get her back.
2. Improve your knowledge on how to keep a relationship together, so you no longer fear getting into one
The main thing that keeps a relationship together for life, is when a man is able to build on his woman’s feelings of respect, attraction and love for him over time, by giving her the kind of relationship dynamic she really wants (e.g. where she feels loved, respected and wanted, but also feels the need to make him feel the same way. It’s not a one-sided, or emotionally selfish relationship. Both the man and woman want to maintain each other’s interest).
If he can do that, she will be a loving, attentive, appreciative woman who sticks by him for life.
As her love for him deepens, she will naturally want to do whatever she can to hold on to him (e.g. take care of her physical appearance, spoil him with dinners and other gestures she knows will please him, have sex as often as he wants and so on).
Yet, if a guy can’t create the right relationship dynamic, a woman will gradually start to feel unhappy, unmotivated, unsatisfied and will do less and less for him.
Eventually, she will either cheat on him to break up with him, or break up with him and then try to find a man who can give her the kind of relationship dynamic she really wants.
When you understand how to create the ideal relationship dynamic, you never have to worry about losing the woman you love again.
She will want to stick with you, because she will know how difficult it is to find a man who gets it.
Additionally, you can also use the knowledge to re-attract your ex back into a relationship, by interacting with her and letting her experience the new and improved you (i.e. the man who now understands how to create the ideal relationship dynamic).
When your ex experiences that with you, she will naturally feel drawn to you again and begin to see you as the one who got away.
As a result, she will want to give you another chance before another quality woman finds you and does everything she can to keep you.
3. Start using your improved knowledge of attraction to make random women feel attracted to you
For example: When ordering a coffee from a cafe, or when talking to women who might like you (e.g. a girl at work, the gym, a neighbor), focus on using your new attraction skills to create sparks of attraction inside of those women.
Notice how differently women behave around you now (e.g. they flirt and show interest, want to keep talking to you for longer, are more open and friendly, seem shy and submissive around you all of a sudden).
When you see that happening, you will naturally become more confident with women.
You will then realize that getting your ex back is very possible because you now have the ability to attract her in the ways that she really wants (e.g. via flirting, by being a playful challenge as you talk to her, by being dominant in a loving way, by being more charismatic, by making her feel girly in comparison to your masculine approach to the interaction).
4. Start dating some of the women who are attracted to you
Dating new women:
- Allows you to practice your newfound attraction techniques and prove to yourself that you’ve got what it takes to attract quality women right now, rather than ending up settling for a woman you’re not that attracted to and being miserable for life, or spending many years alone where you hope to get lucky and meet a pretty girl who likes you without you having to do anything.
- Takes your mind off how unhappy you feel without your ex and makes you feel more in control, confident and sure of yourself. Then, when you interact with your ex, you won’t come across as a sad, lonely and unwanted guy. She will sense that although you probably do want her back, you don’t actually need her back to feel better about herself. That then takes a lot of pressure off her, because women don’t want to be responsible for a guy’s emotional state. A woman wants a guy to be happy, confident and forward moving in life, with or without her.
- Can make your ex feel jealous, especially if the women are just as attractive, or more attractive than her (from her perspective).
- Gives you a confidence boost and shows you that other quality women do want you.
- You don’t have to date new women, but if you do, it can help you to feel happier about being single, rather than only wanting her back, or needing her back to feel better about yourself.
5. Reach out to your ex and re-attract her on a phone call
Once you’re feeling more confident and self-assured, call your ex to say hi as a friend.
Of course, that doesn’t mean you should be nice and neutral when you talk to her, like a friend would.
Instead, be friendly towards her (i.e. don’t come across as though you are trying to secure a relationship. Instead, just talk to her like everything is cool between you and her because you are friends), while also sparking her feelings of sexual attraction for you.
How? By…
- Using humor to make her laugh, smile and feel relaxed during the call, rather than tense, guarded and defensive.
- Being assertive and bold, rather than being hesitant and unsure of yourself. Women aren’t attracted to fear. Women are attracted to confidence, courage and other forms of emotional strength in men.
- Letting her sense (via the way you talk and respond to her) that you believe in your attractiveness and value to her (e.g. maintain your confidence regardless of whether she’s being friendly, cold, distant or even bitchy towards you on the call initially).
- Playfully flirting with her to build up sexual tension between you, so she feels motivated to see you in person to then release the built-up tension with kissing and sex.
6. Meet up with your ex and re-attract her in person
If you’ve successfully awakened her feelings on the phone call, she will probably agree to meet up in person, even if it’s just out of curiosity for her.
In person, make sure to continue awakening her feelings by being confident, charismatic, assertive in a loving way, flirting to build up sexual tension and making her smile, laugh and relax.
When you approach the meet up in that way, she instantly begins to look at you in a new light.
She realizes that you definitely aren’t the same guy she broke up with.
You have leveled up.
As a result, her defenses then come down and she begins wanting to explore her newfound feelings for you.
When that happens…
7. Hook up with your ex sexually and decide what to do from there
If she seems open and is giving signs that she’s attracted to you (e.g. touching you on the arm or leg, licking her lips and looking down in a submissive way or dipping her chin slightly and looking up at you in a girly, cute kind of way, playing with her hair, softly stroking her throat, fidgeting with her necklace), just lean in and give her a quick kiss on the lips.
If she doesn’t pull away, deepen the kiss to continue turning her on.
From there, if she’s open to it, hook up with her sexually at your place or hers.
Most women are open to hooking up with an ex who has re-attracted them (i.e. because they want to explore their newfound feelings for him, he’s familiar, they trust him, they enjoy the drama of it all, it feels safer than sleeping with a random man, it’s fun).
Once you’ve hooked up with her, you can then decide if you want to get back with her, or move on by attracting a new pretty woman.
You will know which option is best for you, once you’ve hooked up with her again.
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