Here are 4 common reasons why a man will still be in love with his ex girlfriend, but she won’t feel the same way…yet!
1. He hasn’t even made her feel new sparks of romantic love for him yet
For a woman to want to be in a relationship with a man, she needs to feel sexually and romantically attracted to him.
Of course, after a breakup, those feelings may be buried under a lot of negative emotions such as anger, disappointment, sadness or regret.
So, if the guy then tells her that he’s still in love with her and wants her back without first using interactions to re-spark some of her feelings for him, she’s naturally going to say that she doesn’t feel the same way.
He’s then left feeling hurt and hopeless about his chances of ever getting her back.
Here’s the thing though…
If you want your ex girlfriend to fall back in love with you and give you another chance, you need to make sure that you reactivate her feelings of respect and sexual attraction for you first.
It’s all about her feelings for you, rather than the other way around.
So, the next time you call her or meet up with her, rather than talk about how much you still love her, use the interaction to make her feel some sexual and romantic attraction for you (e.g. by using ballsy humor and making her feel good to be around you again, being relaxed and flirtatious with her to create a sexual vibe).
The more attracted you make her feel again, the more she will start to realize that she’s not over you.
2. She needs a different relationship dynamic to be truly in love with a man
The kind of relationship dynamic that makes most women happy and want to stick with a guy for life, is when he treats her well, makes her feel loved, appreciated and taken care of, but also motivates her to be a loving, devoted, caring woman to him.
Where a lot of guys go wrong in a relationship with a woman, is by putting in way more effort into the relationship than her to hopefully get her to love him, treat him well and want to stay with him.
She then feels like she is more valuable than him and that he will do anything to hold on to her, which she doesn’t want.
Alternatively, some guys don’t put enough effort into the relationship and cause their woman to feel like she is being taken for granted.
As a result, this almost always lead to a woman losing too much respect, attraction and love for him, so she breaks up with him.
Is it possible that you created the kind of relationship dynamic with your ex where she either felt way more valuable than you or taken for granted?
If so, you now know what you need to do to create a more balanced dynamic between you so she feels motivated to be your girl again.
3. She doesn’t feel like she is losing much, so she doesn’t feel the beautiful pain associated with romantic love
Something that a lot of guys don’t realize is that for a woman to stay in love with him and want to stick with him for life, being a good guy who always takes care of her and spoils her isn’t enough.
She might really like and appreciate that he loves her and makes her feel special.
However, she doesn’t want to feel like she doesn’t have to do anything to earn those things and that even when she’s not being a good woman to him, he would still reward her with his affection and devotion.
Instead, she wants him to make her feel as though she needs to continue impressing him and maintaining his interest and if she doesn’t, he will leave her and she will lose out.
Some guys don’t want to make a woman feel that way and think that it’s all a bunch of mind games or is cruel, but it’s not.
It’s about what women feel attracted to and appreciate when in a relationship with a man.
Additionally, if you don’t do it, then she will do it to you.
It’s better for you to do it so she feels attracted in the way she really wants and you get the respect, love and affection you really want.
So, if you want to regain your ex’s love, you need to make her feel that you’re the catch (e.g. by being more of a challenge to her so she feels she needs to chase you) and that losing you will be something she will live to regret.
4. She can see that he still doesn’t get why she fell out of love with him
In most cases, it will be the subtle things, rather than the obvious things that cause a woman to fall out of love.
For example:
- How her guy struggles to make decisions and constantly needs to ask other people for their opinions before he can make up his mind.
- How he seems so self-assured when he’s with her, but lacks confidence around other people.
- How he overreacts or sulks when things don’t go his way (e.g. at work, when making plans to go out with friends, during an argument).
- How he makes selfish decisions and if she gets upset, he turns things around and makes her feel guilty and like she’s the selfish one.
- How he tends to spend more time with his friends than her and when he does spend time with her, he’s emotionally unavailable.
- How he makes her feel neutral or like she is more powerful than him, so she feels sorry for him or feels repulsed by him, rather than feeling respect and looking up to him.
This is why, if you want your ex girlfriend back, you first need to understand the subtle reasons she fell out of love with you in the first place.
You can then adjust your approach to attraction with her so that you can reactivate her feelings for you.
When she experiences your new, attractive behavior, she will naturally begin to feel more respect and attraction for you as a man.
She will then drop her guard and allow herself to fall back in love with you.
7 Mistakes to Avoid Making if You Want Her to Fall Back in Love With You
1. Making her feel as though she is more valuable than you and you would be so lucky to get another chance with her
1. Making her feel as though she is more valuable than you and you would be so lucky to get another chance with herA man can make a woman feel that way based on what he says to her, texts her, how he behaves around her.
For example:
- He’s always nice and sweet to her, regardless of how badly she treats him.
- Showers her with romantic gestures to prove his love for her (e.g. buys her gifts, flowers, sends her love letters/cards).
- Doesn’t go out with his friends or date other women to prove to her that he’s staying faithful to her.
- Never stands up to her when she’s being unreasonable or is putting him down.
- Accepts any crumbs that she throws his way just to be able to talk to her or see her.
She then feels like she has power over him, which makes her look down on him.
As a result, she doesn’t respect him or feel attracted to him and therefore isn’t motivated to be with him either.
2. Hoping that by explaining how much you love her and why, she will find it in her heart to give you another chance
For a woman to want to get back into a relationship with a guy, there have to be mutual feelings or at least close to mutual feelings.
It can’t just be about him being in love with her and wanting her back because he can’t live without her.
That’s one-sided.
So, if you want your ex back, make sure that you focus on re-sparking her sexual and romantic feelings for you first.
Only when she feels a flood of new love for you will she care that you love her too.
3. Not realizing that sexual attraction is the precursor to romantic love
The fundamental rule to getting an ex back is: Attraction first and everything else after that.
If a woman doesn’t feel attracted to you, then she’s not going to feel motivated to want to be your girlfriend again.
So, you have to start with re-attraction first.
You need to flirt with her and create sexual tension between you so she wants to touch, kiss and have sex.
Sex speeds up the process of getting the relationship back together and stops a lot of indecisiveness on a woman’s part.
4. Not knowing how to trigger her primal feelings of attraction to make her feel instinctively drawn to you again
Sometimes a guy will worry about coming on too strong and scaring his ex off, so he will act really nice, friendly and neutral when interacting with her.
Yet, what he doesn’t realize, is that a woman can care for a guy and even love him in a friendly way, but unless she’s sexually attracted to him, she won’t be interested in being his girlfriend.
She may think of him as a dear friend, but that’s not going to stop her from hooking up with, dating and falling in love with other guys.
If you want her to want you back sexually and romantically, you’ve got to let her experience primal attraction, which can only happen if you have the courage (or balls) to be assertive in a loving way when around her.
Let her see that you aren’t afraid of her reactions.
You are 100% confident and 100% the man in the dynamic between you and her.
If you can do that, she will naturally feel a primal attraction for you and as a result, will find it impossible to resist getting back with you, or at least hooking up with you again sexually to see how she feels.
5. Continuing to text her until she eventually gets bored of it and stops replying or blocks you
Regardless of how great a text interaction with an ex woman is, in the end, it’s just a bunch of words on a screen.
Without one-on-one interactions that grow her feelings of respect, attraction and love and then lead to touching, kissing and sex, a relationship cannot happen.
So, if you want your ex girlfriend to fall back in love with you, you have to be bold enough to get her on a call and then meet up with her in person.
If you don’t, she will remain your texting buddy, or worse, get sick and tired of texting you and cut you off.
6. Hoping that she will remain faithful if you stay on her mind
For an ex woman to feel motivated to be faithful to a guy, she needs to feel that there’s something in it for her (i.e. they’re rebuilding their relationship and will eventually be a couple again).
To make her feel that way, you should use interactions to spark her sexual and romantic feelings for you, so she can see for herself that she would get a new and improved relationship with you, if she gave you another chance.
On the other hand, if you don’t spark her feelings and just stick around hoping that she will fall in love with you because you’re being nice to her, don’t be surprised when you find out that she’s having sex, dating and getting into a relationship with another guy.
7. Assuming that she will want you back if you stop contacting her
That can happen if a woman is still in love with her ex and is hoping they will eventually work things out.
However, if she’s not in love with him and he then gives her a lot of space where he’s not contacting her, she will almost certainly take advantage of that time to move on.
The only time a woman will care if her ex stops contacting her is if he uses interactions with her to spark some of her feelings for him (e.g. by using humor to make her feel happy when she’s talking with him, showing her via his actions, behavior and the way he responds to her that he’s leveled up as a man, making her feel like a desirable woman in his presence) and then stops contacting her for 3 to 7 days to allow for her to miss him.
So, if you want your ex girlfriend to fall back in love with you and want you back, don’t cut off contact with her.
Instead, do what works.
Reactivate her sexual and romantic feelings for you during interactions and get her back.
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