Here are 5 tips to ensure that you make it happen:
1. Understand the very specific thing that would make her want to be in a relationship with you again
If you really want to be with your ex girlfriend in a relationship again, you can’t just assume that saying you’re sorry for what happened and promising to be better this time around is going to do the trick.
If you want the relationship to work this time and for her to want to stay with you, you need to improve your ability to keep a woman happy in a relationship.
When you do, she will then also feel motivated to be a good woman back to you and treat you with love, respect and devotion.
This is why it’s very important that you understand what specific thing you need to do to make her want you back.
However, before you rush off and buy her flowers or expensive gifts in the hope that being more romantic is what she wants from you, take the time to figure out her real, deeper reasons for breaking up with you instead.
When you change your approach and make your ex girlfriend feel that she’s now getting what was missing in her relationship with you, she will automatically drop her guard and open up to the idea of being with you again.
For example: Some specific reasons why a woman will fall out of love and end a relationship are…
- Her guy started off being confident and self-assured, but over time he became insecure, needy, clingy and unsure of himself. As a result, she lost respect for him and stopped looking at him as being a man that she could look up to and feel proud of.
- At the beginning of the relationship the attraction between them was intense, but after the initial thrill wore off, he started treating her more like a friend than a desirable woman. She soon became bored and disinterested and felt she would be better off finding a new man who can spark her feelings for him, rather than staying stuck with a guy who made her feel like his roommate or big sister.
- She felt insecure about her future with him because he didn’t have any big goals or dreams that he was actively working towards achieving in his life. Alternatively, he did have big dreams, but he kept failing at them, wasn’t making any progress for years and constantly blamed external things for his lack of success in life (e.g. the government, his parents, society), rather than taking responsibility for his life and learning from his past mistakes and improving until he succeeded at whatever he was trying to do.
- She got tired of always being the boss in the relationship and making all the decisions for the both of them. This made her feel much more dominant than him resulting in her losing respect for him for being too wimpy and submissive.
- She felt like she was always in second place in his life, or that she wasn’t important compared to his family, friends or hobbies. As a result, she felt unappreciated and unloved which led to her breaking up with him.
Do any of those things sound like a possible reason why your ex girlfriend broke up with you?
When you fully understand what turned her off, you can then change your approach and begin re-attracting her (e.g. if you became too needy and clingy you now show her that you’re emotionally independent).
The more you start giving her the attraction experience she always wanted from you but never got, the more she will drop her guard around you.
It then becomes possible for her to see herself being your girl again.
Another tip to help you get your ex girlfriend in a relationship again is…
2. Don’t shy away from starting the ex back process
Sometimes a guy worries that if he approaches his ex too soon after the break up, she will almost certainly reject him.
So, he might decide to give her some space (quite often a few weeks or even months of space) as a way of letting things cool down and making her miss him.
Yet, that approach almost always backfires.
Here’s the thing…
When a woman has disconnected from her feelings of love, respect and attraction for a guy, not seeing him or hearing from him for a long time actually helps her get over him.
Rather than sit around thinking things like, “I was so annoyed with him when we broke up, that I never realized I would miss him so much if he stopped contacting me. Now I think about him all the time and wish we could just go back and make things right again,” she instead uses the time to move on (usually by hooking up with other guys until she finds a new boyfriend).
Alternatively, a woman might be waiting around and hoping that her ex will do something to re-spark her feelings for him, so that they can work things out.
Yet, the longer she waits for him to make a move, the more disappointed she feels when she doesn’t hear from him.
She may then begin thinking things like, “I guess he never loved me as much as he said he did. He’s not even trying to get me back. Well, I’m done waiting around for him. There are plenty fish in the sea and I can easily find myself a new man if I want to. So, I’m going to stop waiting for him to make a move and I’m going to find myself a new man who does want to be with me. It’s over. It’s time to move on.”
She then focuses on fully getting over him and moving on (usually by hooking up with other men until she finds one she wants to be in a relationship with).
Then, by the time her ex plucks up the courage to call her after a few weeks or months (in some cases it can even be years), rather than jump at the idea of getting back together again, she will likely say something along the lines of, “I’m sorry but I thought you’d lost interest, so I’ve moved on. I’m with someone else now and I’m happy again. So, please don’t call me again.”
This is why, if you want to be with your ex girlfriend in a relationship again, you can’t wait too long to begin the ex back process with her.
If you waste time waiting, she may eventually get to the point where she moves on way too far to want to get back with you.
Remember: Giving her 3 to 7 days of space to allow of things to calm down between you is perfectly fine.
However, anything longer than a week and you’re risking giving her the time she needs to get over you and move on.
Don’t wait!
Get her on a call with you right away and spark some of her feelings of respect and attraction for you (e.g. by making her laugh and smile and feel good to be talking to you again, by maintaining your confidence with her regardless of what she says to make you feel nervous or tense).
Then, when she’s feeling happy and relaxed get her to agree to meet up with you in person so that you can fully reactivate her feelings for you and get her back.
Another tip to help you get your ex girlfriend in a relationship again is…
3. Know that you can make her feel more respect, attraction and love for you than you ever did before
Everyone makes mistakes at some point in their life.
However, the greatest people in the world are those who learn from those mistakes and come back even better and stronger than before.
So, regardless of what happened in your relationship with your ex girlfriend previously, you now have the opportunity to start fresh, having learned from your past mistakes.
That means, you are now in the unique position of being able to offer her a new and improved attraction experience, mainly because you’ve become a better man since the break up.
This is why, the most important thing for you to do right now to get your ex girlfriend in a relationship again, is to interact with her and make her feel sparks of sexual and romantic attraction for you again, based on who you are now.
For example: Some of the ways you can do that are by…
- Maintaining your confidence with her regardless of what she’s saying or doing to put you off (e.g. she’s saying that there’s no chance of her changing her mind, she’s being cold and aloof towards you).
- Showing her via your attitude, conversation style, actions and behavior that you’re no longer the same guy she broke up with (e.g. you’re more confident and self-assured rather than insecure and self-conscious, you’re more of a challenge now rather than being too easy and predictable, you’re more emotionally independent rather than being clingy and needy).
- Reacting differently to what she expects, (e.g. if she tries to make you jealous by talking about other guys, rather than get upset like you used to, you now laugh and say things like, “Good for you,” or “Sounds great.” She then feels shocked (in a good way) by your confidence and emotional maturity and she naturally starts to feel sparks of respect and attraction for you again).
- Being less of a nice, sweet, pushover with her and more of a challenge, thereby making her feel like she is the one who now has to work hard to impress you and keep you interested in her, rather than the other way around.
- Being more emotionally masculine around her and making her feel sexy and desirable, rather than being too nice and neutral and making her feel like a friend or an acquaintance in your presence.
The more your ex girlfriend interacts with you and discovers that you’ve leveled up as a man, the more her feelings of respect and attraction for you will be re-sparked.
As a result, her defenses start to come down and she then becomes more open to talking with you over the phone and meeting up with you in person, to see what happens from there.
Another tip to help you get your ex girlfriend in a relationship again is…
4. Stop thinking that the ball is in her court
After they get broken up with, some guys fall into the trap of thinking that getting back with her is totally up to her and he just has to wait around and hope that she changes her mind.
As a result, he may end up thinking something along the lines of, “I want to be with my ex girlfriend in a relationship again, but it’s not up to me. If she says no, then it has to be no. There’s nothing I can do to change that. So, even though I really want her back, I have to wait and hope that she will eventually forgive me and then give me a sign that she’s open to at least talking to me again. My hands are tied. It’s all up to her now.”
Yet, here’s what he doesn’t understand…
A man has a lot of control over the ex back process when he focuses on making his ex woman have sexual and romantic feelings for him again.
When he makes her feel surges of respect and attraction for him again via the way he thinks, talks, acts and behaves around her, she naturally begins to want him back for her own reasons (e.g. she realizes that she now feels attracted in new and exciting ways and she wants to explore those feelings, she’s worried she may have made a mistake by breaking up with him).
As a result, he can then easily get her back into a relationship with him, because she is open to seeing where things go.
On the other hand, if a guy just sits around waiting for her to make the first move, or give him a sign that she’s open to interacting with him again, he could be waiting for a long time.
In the meantime, she’s busy hooking up and dating other guys and moving on.
This is why, you need to start the ex back process with your girlfriend right away.
Don’t sit around waiting for signs from her and risk losing her to another man.
Remember: The ball is in your court, not hers.
So, if you want her back, you have to have the courage to take the lead and make it happen.
Another tip to help you get your ex girlfriend in a relationship again is…
5. Don’t aim for a relationship right away
Even though you’re pretty sure that you want to be with your ex girlfriend in a relationship again, it’s very likely that she doesn’t feel the same way right now.
So, if you push her into committing to getting back with you before she feels ready (i.e. you’ve reactivated her sexual and romantic feelings for you), rather than get her back, you will almost certainly achieve the opposite and scare her away.
She might then say, “Look, I know you mean well, but it’s over between us. Please accept that and move on.”
Here’s the thing…
A woman doesn’t want to be pressured back into a relationship with her ex if she doesn’t feel the same way about him as he does for her.
So, to avoid scaring her off, what you need to do is stop trying to get her back into a relationship right away and focus instead on having fun together.
Build on her feelings first and then from there, progress to hugging, kissing and sex.
Sex speeds up the process of reconciling the relationship and makes her feel more open to the idea of being your girl again.
Remember: Just because you’re ready for a relationship again doesn’t mean she is.
This is why, you have to relax and stop pushing her.
From now on, use any interactions you have with her (e.g. on the phone and especially in person) to make her laugh, smile and feel good to be around you again.
The more you do that, the more she will stop putting up walls.
When she’s no longer feeling so defensive around you all the time, she will be able to reconnect with her feelings of respect, attraction and love for you.
When that happens, the idea of being in a relationship with you again will start to feel good to her too.
On the other hand, if you give her the impression that the only thing on your mind is to get her back into a relationship with you, she will probably clam up even more and maybe even try to cut you out of her life completely (e.g. by blocking your number, refusing to see you in person, unfriending you on social media).
Don’t let that happen to you.
If you’re serious about getting her back into a relationship with you, the main thing you need to focus on from this point onwards is sparking her feelings for you.
When you do, it won’t take long before you get what you wanted all along (i.e. a relationship with her).
Quickly Get Her Back Into a Relationship Again By Avoiding These 2 Mistakes
Getting an ex girlfriend back into a relationship is actually easier than some guys think.
It’s just a matter of using the right approach.
This is why it’s important that you don’t turn her off by making the following mistakes:
1. Giving her the impression that you don’t have any other options
In some cases, a guy makes the mistake of thinking that the best way to prove to his ex that he only has eyes for her, even though they’re broken up, is by avoiding other women.
Essentially, he’s hoping that when she finds out that he’s being so loyal to her, she will feel flattered and that will then make her open up to the idea of being in a relationship with him again.
Yet, what he doesn’t realize is that, giving a woman the impression that he doesn’t have any other options besides her can actually make her lose even more respect and attraction for him. Why?
Essentially because, almost all women want to be with the type of man that other women feel attracted to and want.
They might never openly admit that to you, but that’s how they secretly feel.
So, if your ex girlfriend gets the sense that you’re clinging to her because no other women want you, she is going to be quite happy with the decision she made (i.e. to break up with you).
This is why, if you want her back, you need to make her feel worried about losing you, rather than turning her off by seeming desperate and like a relationship with her is the best you can do.
That doesn’t mean you have to date other women to make her feel that way.
Instead, you just have to start being the type of guy that she knows other women would want to be with (e.g. confident, emotionally strong, focused and determined, charming).
When she realizes that not only are you now the man she always wanted you to be, but that she also risks losing you, she will automatically start wanting a relationship with you too.
The next mistake to avoid making is…
2. Not realizing that she didn’t want the old version of the relationship you offered and may be completely into the new version
Some guys give up hope after a break up, because their ex says things like, “There’s nothing you can say or do that will make me change my mind.”
A guy like that often mistakenly assumes that there’s nothing he can do to convince her that things can be different between them this time.
Yet, that’s far from the truth.
When you change your approach to attraction, she will change how she feels about you.
It happens naturally and without you having to force it.
So, if you want to be with your ex girlfriend in a relationship again, focus on giving her an upgraded attraction experience from now on.
Show her by way of your behavior, conversation style and actions that you have already improved on some of the issues that were turning her off before.
For example:
If you were insecure and self-doubting before, you’re now more confident and believe in your value as a man.
If you were too nice and let her dominate you with her confident personality, you’re now more of a challenge to her so she feels like she has to try and impress you.
If you treated her more like a friend before, you now make her feel sexy and desirable in your presence.
The more she realizes that being in a relationship with you now will be completely different to the way it was before (because you’re now a new and improved man), the more she will want to give it another go.
So, don’t spend any more time thinking “I want to be with my girlfriend in a relationship again.”
Instead, start doing something about it right now.
Before you know it, you and her will be back together.
You will feel the kiss of her lips, the softness of her naked skin and you will hear the beautiful sound of her voice when she says, “I love you” again for the first time in a long time.
Those are some beautiful moments that you can experience with her, but you have to start doing something about it while you still can.
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