Here are 7 of the common reasons why a woman will lie about her reasons for breaking up with her boyfriend:
1. She cheated before breaking up with you and didn’t want you to find out about it
Sometimes, a woman might find herself feeling unhappy in her relationship with her guy.
This can be because the relationship has become too mundane and predictable.
It might also be because her guy has stopped making her feel sexy and desirable and instead treats her more like a neutral friend or a roommate.
As a result, the spark between them has died, which makes her feel more attracted to guys when she interacts with them and they flirt with her and make her feel attracted and excited again.
This can lead to her getting emotionally and even physically involved with another guy, even though she’s still in a relationship.
If she then realizes that she’s getting the attraction experience she really wants from the other guy, rather than from her man, she will almost certainly break up with him.
However, instead of just coming out and saying something along the lines of, “Look, I just don’t feel attracted to you anymore. There’s no sexual spark between us and I’ve become attracted to another man. In fact, I’ve cheated on you with him and now I’m leaving you to be with him,” she lies about her real reasons for breaking up with him.
Basically, she’s motivated to lie, because she likely doesn’t want to hurt her guy.
Additionally, she’s wary of making him angry with her and causing him to react in an aggressive or even violent way (e.g. he insults her and calls her a whore, he lashes out by either breaking things or even hitting her).
Finally, she likely doesn’t want to look bad in his eyes and in the eyes of all the people who will find out about what she’s done (e.g. mutual friends, coworkers, family).
So, she lies about her reasons for breaking up, so that she can move on without coming across as being the guilty one.
In the meantime, her ex, being none the wiser about what she did, can sit around missing her and thinking about how she’s the one that got away.
She then gets to move on, feels good about herself and doesn’t have to take any responsibility for her actions.
2. She had to come up with a lie or excuse to break up with you, otherwise she feared you wouldn’t accept it
In some cases, a woman may have tried to end her relationship with her guy several times before.
Yet, every time she’s gotten to the point of walking out on him, he somehow managed to convince her to change her mind.
For example: Some of the ways a guy might do that are by…
- Begging, pleading and even crying as a way of manipulating her into changing her mind.
- Promising her that this time he really will change and become the man she wants him to be if she will just give him another chance.
- Giving her elaborate reasons why she can’t break up with him (e.g. he’s in the middle of exams or a big work assignment and he’ll fail if she goes now, they share the bills and he won’t be able to afford to live without her, for the sake of their children, his mother/father has a weak heart and this might kill her/him).
- Bombarding her with gifts, flowers and romantic gestures to hopefully sweep her off her feet again.
- Getting angry with her and accusing her of cheating, in an attempt to make her stay with him out of feelings of guilt.
So, to avoid him doing something like that again, a woman might lie to her guy so that she can get out of the relationship with him.
She will then likely give him an excuse he can’t talk her out of because he might come across as being mean, heartless or inconsiderate of her feelings and needs (e.g. she needs to focus on her studies or she will fail, she’s been offered a great job opportunity in another town/city/country and she’s thinking about taking it and she doesn’t want to break up with him later on because it will hurt even more, she’s having family problems and she needs time to work through that).
Then, once she’s managed to go through with the breakup, she will focus on quickly finding herself a new man to move on with.
If her ex then tries to get her back, she can say something along the lines of, “Sorry, but it’s too late. I’m with someone else now and I’m happy. Please accept that what we had is over and move on.”
In a case like this, if you want to get your ex back, you need to use a different approach (i.e. one that doesn’t make her feel pressured into getting back with you again).
So, what should you do?
Just focus on making interactions with her fun.
Make her laugh and smile, so that she feels happy and relaxed when talking to you, rather than her wanting to pull away and cut you out of her life permanently.
The more she feels drawn to you again in a good way, the more you can re-spark her sexual and romantic feelings for you.
Then, getting her back becomes easy, because she wants it too, rather than her feeling pressured into doing something she doesn’t want anymore.
3. She liked you, but wasn’t in love with you and didn’t want to have to explain that to you
Sometimes a woman will get into a relationship with a guy, even though she’s not 100% sure if he’s the one for her.
Secretly, she may think things like, “He’s a really sweet guy and I do like him as a person. He’s really kind and considerate and he treats me well. I know I don’t feel a strong spark for him yet, but maybe over time that will change and I will grow to love him.”
Basically, she cares for the guy and she’s hoping that over time, he will be able to create a relationship dynamic that will make her fall deeply in love with him and want to be a good, loving, devoted woman to him.
Yet, if that doesn’t happen, usually because the guy has no idea how to grow her feelings of respect, attraction and love for him, she might decide to end things with him and try to find a man who can make her feel the deep, sexual and romantic love that she’s craving.
Of course, because she does care for him as a person, she won’t want to come out and tell him that she just isn’t in love with him, especially if he’s always saying things like, “I love you so much! You’re my perfect woman and I’m so happy that I found you. I could never find another woman like you. You’re the love of my life.”
So, to avoid hurting him, she will likely just come up with a convincing lie about why she wants to break up with him.
From there she will simply focus on moving on, which is probably quite easy for her, because she wasn’t really ever in love with him to begin with.
Here’s the thing though…
If you want to get your ex back, you can actually make it happen.
All it takes is for you to use a different approach to attraction with her.
When you make her feel strong surges of sexual and romantic attraction for you in a way that you never did before, she will quickly open back up to being your girl again.
Except this time, there will be one difference: Not only will she like you as a person, she will also respect you, feel sexually attracted to you and be in love with you as her man.
Another possible reason why your ex lied about why she broke up with you is…
4. She knew that telling you the truth would have hurt you and possibly even caused you to become very angry at her
Sometimes, a woman might want to avoid hurting her ex by telling him the truth of why she wants to leave him.
So, to soften the blow and not destroy his confidence, she might lie to him to let him down easily.
Alternatively, she may choose to lie to him rather than risk getting caught up in a potentially difficult situation with him where he becomes angry and maybe even turns aggressive or violent towards her.
Here’s the thing…
A woman’s natural instincts will always guide her into doing things that are least likely to hurt her and can be done in the easiest and safest possible way.
So, if a woman decides that she wants to end her relationship with a guy, she will do it in the best possible way she can to ensure that she doesn’t get caught up in a situation that is uncomfortable or even dangerous for her.
Of course, most guys are good guys and they wouldn’t really do anything to hurt their ex, but some women simply don’t want to take that risk, making lying to him the next best option.
Then, by the time the guy finds out that she lied about her reasons for breaking up with him, she will have hopefully moved on and found herself a new man who can protect her from her ex if the need arises.
Here’s the thing though…
If you want your ex back, you can’t wait around for her to move on with someone else before you make a move.
You need to quickly interact with her again, especially over the phone and in person and reactivate her sexual and romantic feelings for you.
When you do, she will realize that losing you, is something she doesn’t want to risk anymore and then end up regretting it later on.
Another possible reason why your ex lied about why she broke up with you is…
5. She doesn’t want you to find out the truth in case you want to then get revenge by telling mutual friends what she did to you
In a lot of instances, a woman who has done something bad to her guy, which then leads to her wanting to break up with him (e.g. she cheated on him with someone close to him like his best friend, a colleague or even a relative, she stole from him, she told his deepest secret to someone else), usually doesn’t want other people finding out bout it.
So, to avoid being branded as a terrible person by their friends and have them cut her off and side with her ex over her, a woman might lie about her reasons for breaking up with him.
In that way, she’s likely hoping that he won’t find out her real reasons for breaking up with him and avoid him taking revenge on her by dragging her name through the mud.
She can then avoid being labeled as the ‘bad guy’ for what she did to him and continue having a good relationship with their mutual friends.
In some cases, she may even get all the sympathy from them if they assume that her ex was the cause of the breakup instead of her.
Another possible reason why your ex lied about why she broke up with you is…
6. An ex boyfriend reacted badly when she broke up with him, so she feared getting a similar reaction from you
There are some instances where a woman has had a really bad experience when breaking up with a guy.
For example: Her previous ex might have really lost it when she wanted to break up with him and started insulting her and calling her names.
He may also have accused her of cheating on him.
Alternatively, he might have refused to accept her decision to leave him and as a result, he wouldn’t leave her alone and ended up stalking her on social media and even in person by showing up at her work or home.
This led to her feeling really traumatized by the experience and naturally never wanting to go through that kind of thing again.
So, rather than risk it when breaking up with her current guy, a woman might just decide to lie about her reasons, to hopefully end things with him on a good note.
She can then move on, without having to deal with the drama he might create if she told him the truth about why she wants to end the relationship.
Then, if he finds out later on, she will have hopefully already found a replacement guy and it won’t really matter how he reacts at that point.
Of course, you’re likely nothing like her ex guy.
So, to prove that to her and also reactivate her feelings for you, it’s important that you remain calm and relaxed now that you and her are broken up.
Then, simply use humor during interactions to bring down her guard and show her that you’re the kind of guy she actually wants to be with (e.g. confident, emotionally strong, emotionally mature).
She will then naturally drop her guard and open up to at least talking to you over the phone and seeing you in person more often.
It’s then easy for you to fully reactivate her feelings for you and make her want to be your girl again.
Another possible reason why your ex lied about why she broke up with you is…
7. She wanted to hurt you even more by causing you to feel betrayed by her
Some women feel very bitter and angry about having to break up with a guy who they have invested a lot of their time and emotions in.
This has a bit to do with the fact that women have a limited number of years where they can find a man and get into a serious relationship with him, before their chances of falling pregnant and starting a family begin to diminish.
Essentially, it’s hard-wired into a woman to find herself a man who will love her, take care of her and help provide for any offspring that they have.
So, when a woman realizes that she has just wasted many months, or years of her life with a guy who didn’t have what it takes, she may feel angry and resentful towards him for wasting her time (or her youthful attractiveness).
She may then decide to lie to him about her reasons for breaking up with him for letting her down.
Then, when he finds out about it and feels hurt and betrayed, she will have gotten her revenge on him for how he made her feel in the relationship with him.
This is why, if you want another chance with your ex, you need to show her that you’re at a different level now than when she broke up with you and have become the man she always wanted you to be (e.g. more emotionally strong and masculine, less clingy and needy, more of a challenge).
When she can sense for herself that the changes in you are real and that you’re not going to go back to making the same attraction mistakes and treating her the way you did before, she’ll be able to start trusting you again.
When that happens, her walls will begin to crumble and she will open back up to talking to you and hanging out with you again to see where things go from there.
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