In most cases that means she cheated while on holiday.
In other cases it means that she didn’t cheat, but realized she wasn’t missing you while she was away.
In cases like that, she may have decided to end the relationship and find someone who made her feel more love, respect and attraction.
So, if your girlfriend broke up with you after coming back from a holiday, here are 5 things to ask yourself if you now want to get her back:
1. Did you make her feel intense love for you, or was she only kind of in love?
Sometimes a woman will date a guy and even get into a relationship with him, even though she’s not completely attracted to him or in love with him.
If she is hopeful that things will change over time, she will stick with him and look to see if she falls more and more in love with him.
If the guy is able to build on her feelings of respect, attraction and love over time, she will forget about her initial doubts and start seeing him as her ideal man.
On the other hand, if he fails to build on her feelings and ends up turning her off even more (e.g. He feels insecure about losing her, so he becomes being clingy and needy. He let’s her make all the decisions in the relationship to please her, but that only makes her lose respect for him for not being man enough for her), she will never truly fall in love with him.
Even if she sticks with him for a few more moths, she will be thinking, “This isn’t working out. One of these days I’m going to have to break up with him and move on.”
She may then tell her girlfriends about and they might suggest going away for a holiday (with them, or on her own) to see if she misses him.
Then, when goes away on holiday and realizes that she’s not thinking about him and she doesn’t miss him, she might come to the conclusion that it’s best if they break up.
She will then return from her holiday and say something along the lines of, “I’ve had time to think while I was away and I’ve decided that I don’t want to be in a relationship anymore. I’m sorry, but it’s over between us.”
So, what can a guy do if that’s essentially what happened to him?
Well, what you need to understand is that even if your girlfriend never felt strong attraction or love for you before, it doesn’t mean that you can’t make her feel like that now.
You can.
In fact, when you interact with her from now on and say and do the types of things that make her feel the kind of attraction she always wanted to feel for you, she will begin to look at you in a more positive light.
Even though she may previously have doubted that she could ever fully love you, she will suddenly start imagining what it would be like to stick with you for the long term.
Another question to ask yourself is…
2. Were you able to make her feel attracted initially, but the spark died out in your relationship over time?
Although most guys will give their woman a lot of attention at the start of a relationship (e.g. compliment her on her appearance, send her romantic texts, take her on romantic dinner dates, be loving and attention), all of that usually fades away once the relationship becomes comfortable.
When a guy gets too comfortable, he might then make the mistake of treating his woman more like his friend, or a roommate than anything else.
As a result, the spark of sexual attraction that was originally there will gradually start to fade away.
Why?
Making a woman feel like your friend doesn’t make her wet.
What makes her wet is when you make her feel like she’s your girl and you’re her man.
You always have to maintain the boundary that keeps you and her feeling like a man and a woman who are sexually and romantically attracted to each other, rather than a couple of buddies who love each other.
Being buddies can work for a while, but it doesn’t last.
The sexual spark fades away because you no longer look at each other in that way anymore.
You might still have sex and even feel attracted to each other and in love, but it just isn’t the same as maintaining the boundary of being romantically attracted lovers, rather than just great friends.
Initially, a woman might say to herself, “I know that he loves me and I love him, so let’s just see how this goes. Hopefully we won’t end up feeling more like friends. It seems to be heading in that direction, but I hope it doesn’t.”
Yet, when she notices that nothing is changing and the spark continues to fade away, she may begin to think, “The spark in our relationship is dead. All we ever do these days is watch TV or go out with friends. He never even notices that I go to the gym to look good for him, or that I always make an effort to wear nice clothes when we’re together. There was a time when he couldn’t keep his hands off me and would compliment me about how I looked. Now he doesn’t even seem to notice. I’m tired of feeling like his roommate. I want to feel like a real woman again. I want to feel sexy and noticed.”
If the guy picks up on her unhappiness and begins giving her the attention that she is craving, then she will quickly settle back into being his adoring girl.
Yet, if he just lets it slide (e.g. he writes it off as her being a moody woman, thinks that she will be fine about it because they used to be so in love), she will eventually get to the point where she’s feels bored and unsatisfied by the relationship.
Then, if she happens to go away on holiday and interacts with other men who make her feel the way she wants to feel (e.g. beautiful, sexy, desirable), it may push her over the edge and convince her to finally break up with him.
So, if your girlfriend broke up with you after coming back from a holiday, it could be because you stopped making her feel like a feminine, girly, sexy woman around you.
Don’t worry though.
If you want her back, you can begin to make her feel that way from now on and when you, she will start to feel drawn to you again.
So, make sure that every time you interact with her from now on (e.g. over the phone and especially when you see her in person), you actively trigger her feelings of sexual attraction for you by making her feel sexy and desirable, rather than just being a nice, polite, neutral friend to her.
Some guys worry about doing that because they assume that their ex girlfriend will use it against them (e.g. she will feel like she is too good for him now, or that he is horny and isn’t getting any sex now that she has left him).
Yet, you can’t worry about those sorts of things.
You’ve got to do what works to get a woman back.
Women are very different to men, so if you want to get her back, you will usually have to do things that seem like the opposite of what you think might work.
Another question to ask yourself is…
3. Do you have a lot of purpose and ambition outside of your relationship with her?
Some guys don’t realize that a woman doesn’t want to be the most important thing in a man’s life.
If they are in a committed, loving relationship, then she will want to be the most important person, but not the most important thing.
So, when a guy puts all of his attention and focus on her and starts neglecting important areas in his life (e.g. he gives up on pursuing his goals and dreams, he quits his hobbies and interests, he cuts off his friends) to spend all his time with her, rather than make her happy, it turns her off and makes her feel frustrated.
In almost all cases, a woman doesn’t want to feel responsible for a man’s emotional state in a relationship (e.g. he’s only happy when he’s with her, he’s only confident when she reassures him), or to be his main reason for living.
A woman wants her man to be happy, confident and forward moving in life with, or without her support or reassurance.
So, when she finds herself in a relationship with a guy who doesn’t have much purpose or direction in life outside of his relationship with her (i.e. he’s not following through on achieving his biggest goals, dreams and ambitions), she will inevitably start feeling smothered by his need to cling on to her and hide from the world behind her.
Initially, she might try to encourage him to be more independent, but if he fails to pick up on her hints and continues being needy and clingy, she will begin to cut herself off from him emotionally.
If she goes on a holiday and has a lot of fun being away from him, it may give her the motivation she was looking for to finally break up with him.
So, if you want to get your girlfriend back, you must show her that even though you still care about her and want her back, you don’t actually need her back.
When she can see that you’re no longer emotionally dependent on her and have become your own man, her guard will come down and she will open herself up to the idea of giving you another chance.
On the other hand, if she gets a sense that you’re falling apart emotionally without her, she will want to stick to her decision about being broken up and then move on.
Another question to ask yourself is…
4. Do you know exactly what you need to change to re-attract her when you next interact with her?
For example: Some of the reasons why a woman might lose respect, attraction and love for her guy include:
- He stopped being the confident man that she initially fell for and became needy, clingy and insecure.
- He started treating her more like a friend than a sexy, desirable woman.
- He wasn’t ballsy enough in the relationship, so she felt more emotionally dominant than him.
- She grew up and matured a lot faster than him, which made her feel as though he was holding her back.
- He wasn’t affectionate enough and she felt neglected by that.
- She felt like she could never truly be herself with him because he was too emotionally sensitive, or too judgmental and critical of her.
Do you know exactly what turned her off?
If yes, have you already changed those things about yourself?
If you haven’t and you interact with her again, she’s going to pick up on it and probably won’t want anything to do with you after that.
So, before you contact her, make sure that you are fully ready and prepared to re-attract her and seduce her back into a relationship with you.
Another question to ask yourself is…
5. Are you willing to take her back if she cheated while on holiday?
In a relationship, a man and a woman must be able to fully trust each other, or else it simply won’t last.
So, if your ex cheated on you while she was away on holiday, you need to decide if she’s worth getting back with, or if you’re just going to cut your losses and find yourself a new woman.
If you decide that you want your girlfriend back, you need to be sure of two very important things.
Firstly, you need to ensure that your reasons for wanting her back are because you know she’s the one for you and not because you secretly believe that you won’t be able to find yourself another, even better and more attractive woman than her.
If you are only trying to get her back to avoid being lonely, she will pick up on that and it will turn her off.
Secondly, if you agree to take her back, you have to be able to fully forgive her so you can both move forward with a clean slate.
If you get back with her and keep starting arguments about her potential cheating while she was away, the relationship isn’t going to last.
Of course, you can do that if you want to (e.g. if you don’t care about keeping the relationship together), but if you want the relationship to work, it’s best to start off on a clean slate and not bring up the past again.
3 Mistakes That Guys Often Make When Trying to Get an Ex Woman Back Who Ended the Relationship After Coming Back From a Holiday
1. Angrily accusing her of cheating
It’s only natural that when a woman breaks up with a guy after being on holiday, he might start thinking things like, “Why would she do that? I bet she cheated on me. That’s the only reasonable explanation that I can think of. After all, we had a perfect relationship before that. I always treated her well, so what happened? She must have gotten drunk and cheated on me.”
He might be right, but getting angry with her and accusing her of cheating isn’t going to fix things between them.
Unfortunately, a lot of guys can’t stop themselves from feeling angry (it’s understandable), so they end up exploding at their girlfriend and accusing her of cheating.
For example: A guy might say something like, “Why are you doing this?! Before you left, you said that you loved me and would miss me. Yet, now that you’re back, that love you felt for me seems to have vanished and you want to break up all of a sudden. So, let’s cut the crap! You cheated on me while you were away, didn’t you? Admit it! Be honest with me! Admit that the reason you want to break up is because you’re a lying, cheating slut who couldn’t be faithful when we were apart! You went on your little holiday and opened your legs like a slut. You cheated on me, didn’t you? So, tell me…was it just one guy, or did you have a whole parade of men going through your bedroom? I can’t believe you would do this to me! What kind of person are you? An absolute slut!”
Yet, here’s the thing…
Even though a guy might feel 100% justified in feeling angry with his ex, losing his cool and insulting her, isn’t going to make her want to give him another chance, especially if he is accusing her of cheating without any proof that anything happened.
Getting angry and accusing her of being slutty and unfaithful will usually only cause a woman to lose even more respect for her ex and she may even start to fear for her well-being.
Then, by the time he has calmed down, he might discover that she has cut him out of her life entirely (e.g. by blocking his phone number, unfriending him on social media, rejecting his attempts to get her to meet up), which simply makes it more difficult to get her back.
It sucks that she might have cheated, but you have to maintain your cool if you want to get her back.
Once you get her back and have sex again (where a condom to be safe, if you want to), you can then ask her if she cheated.
At that point, a woman will be much more likely to admit the truth because she will feel as though you and her are back on good terms after having had sex.
If you find out that she did cheat, you can decide then and there to dump her and move on, or forgive her and start a new relationship off on a clean slate (e.g. you and her write it off as a silly mistake that she made while drunk).
It’s really up to you.
You will have to trust your gut instinct in that moment and go with what feels right for you.
Another mistake that guys make when in a situation like yours is…
2. Pouring his heart out to her and hoping that it makes her change her mind
When a guy’s girlfriend is saying things like, “It’s over between us, I don’t want to be with you anymore,” he might decide that the only way to make her change her mind is by telling her how much she still means to him.
He might then say things like, “I want you to know that no matter what happened while you were on holiday, it doesn’t matter to me. All that can be in the past. We don’t have to ever talk about your reasons for wanting to break up with me. What happened over there is what happened. It’s done. What matters now is that we stay together. I love you more than anything else in my life and I can’t go on without you. Please reconsider your decision and give us a chance. I love you more than anything, so give me a chance. That’s all I’m asking for. I promise you won’t regret it.”
Here’s the thing though…
If a woman no longer has feelings for a guy, she simply doesn’t care about his feelings for her.
Even though he’s pouring his heart out to her, she’s usually just going to say something like, “Look…thank you for being such a nice guy about this, but you have to accept my decision. Even though I know that you love me and would forgive me for anything, I still think it’s better for both of us if we go our separate ways. I had time to think while I was away and I know that I don’t want to get back with you. So, please, just let me go. It’s over.”
The next mistake to avoid is…
3. Not understanding what she really wants from a relationship with him or any other man
A guy will sometimes offer a woman a type of relationship experience that she’s not even interested in.
For example: He might try to be more romantic by sending her flowers and cute cards saying things like, “I love you. We can make this work,” or “Let’s start over and build a new future together.”
If one of the reasons why she dumped him was that he was too much of a soppy romantic and wasn’t ballsy and masculine enough around her, she’s going to be turned off by his old approach to romance and attraction.
This is why, if you want to get your girlfriend back, you have to get to the core reasons for the break up and begin to fix those things, rather than trying to patch up the relationship by offering her things that she doesn’t want or even care about.
If you can’t give her the attraction she really wants in a relationship, she will feel motivated to stick to her decision to be broken up.
So, if you want to get her back now, you’ve got to be willing to use a new approach to attraction.
Don’t try to get her back by using the same old approach to attraction that she got bored of in the relationship.
It’s time to use a new and unexpected approach that shocks her into wanting to be your woman again.
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