Are you looking for nice things to say to women because you are hoping it will get you laid or get you a girlfriend?
Not so fast.
If you want to get laid or get a girlfriend, the main thing that you need to do is make a woman feel sexually attracted to you…not say nice things to her.
Why?
If a woman doesn’t feel sexually attracted to a guy, she’s not going to become sexually excited when a guy says nice things to her.
She will simply look at him as yet another typical nice guy who is hoping to be get a chance with her because he’s being so being nice, sweet, polite and respectful.
If he keeps saying nice, sweet things to her, she might even feel annoyed by the fact that he doesn’t even understand that a woman needs to feel sexually attracted to a guy to want to be with him, rather than just feel nice, sweet, friendly emotions towards him.
Watch this video to understand why…
As you will discover from the video above, there’s nothing wrong with being nice to women, but if you want to get laid or get a girlfriend, you have to trigger a woman’s feelings of sexual attraction for you first.
Attraction comes first and everything else flows on smoothly and effortlessly after that.
For example: If a guy hasn’t made a woman feel any sexual attraction to him and then says, “I like your style. You have a great fashion sense” the woman will most-likely appreciate the compliment, but she isn’t going to be thinking, “WOW! This guy that I’m not attracted to likes how I dress! Wow, that must mean he likes me! Woo hoo! I might have a chance with him.”
On the other hand, if a confident guy who has already made a woman feel attracted to him says, “I like your style. You look sexy in whatever you wear” the woman is going to feel excited that the guy she is attracted to also finds her attractive.
In fact, she is going to look at him as being a charming guy, whereas the guy who didn’t make her feel attracted and said something nice to her will simply be seen as a nice guy or a friendly guy.
If you want to be successful at picking up women and keeping a woman interested in a relationship, you have to be able to make women feel attracted to you.
Being nice is great, but it’s not enough for a woman to want to have sex with a guy or stick by him in a relationship. Attraction is the glue that gets men and women together in the first place and then helps to keep them stuck together when in a relationship.
Things You Can Say
As long as the woman is attracted to you, she will appreciate nice or sweet things that you say and see you as being charming.
For example:
“You’re twice as beautiful when you smile.” When she then smiles in response, smile and say “See, there it is” and hold eye contact with her while smiling. That is an example of flirting by the way.
Another example:
If she says something intelligent. Smile and say in a half-joking, half-serious way “Wow, you’re beautiful and intelligent. I’ve hit the jackpot talking to you” and then add in some of the humor that makes women feel attracted.
What type of humor is that?
Watch this video for some examples…
Talking to Attractive Women
Many guys find it easy to talk to women that they don’t find attractive (or women who are already taken), but when they talk to a beautiful woman who is single, they suddenly begin to try really hard to impress her and be “liked” by her.
He doesn’t want to stuff up in any way, so he tries to be on his best behavior around her to hopefully show her that he’s nice, trustworthy and doesn’t look at her in a sexual way like other guys do.
He might think something like, “What if she thinks that I’m like all other guys who want to have sex with her? I will show her that I’m nice and that I don’t look at her in that way and hopefully she will be impressed by my self-control. Hopefully she will see that I respect her and will treat her like a princess if she gives me a chance.”
Yet, that’s not how it works.
If a woman is attractive, most of the guys she meets try to kiss her ass by being a really nice guy around her, rather than making her feel attracted, which is one of the 3 things that attractive women hate about most single men.
The majority of guys that a woman meets are only capable of making her feel friendly or awkward emotions, rather than intense sexual desire and arousal.
It’s very easy for a woman to attract guys because most men will have sex with her simply based on her appearance. However, women don’t have the same type of attraction reaction than men do.
Rather than instantly being willing to have sex simply based on a man’s appearance, a woman is looking for other qualities in a guy.
She’s hoping to meet a guy who can turn her on with his personality, confidence, conversation style, masculine vibe and charisma.
That is what really matters to most women.
Yes, a small percentage of women only want a guy who is good looking like a male model, but the majority of women are more interested in how a guy’s personality and behavior makes her feel.
When you are the guy who can offer a woman the experiencing of feeling sexually turned on and aroused by the way you are interacting with her, you will laugh at how easy it is to attract and pick up women and how little competition there is from other guys.
Most guys in this world waste years (and even decades) of their life trying to be impressive to women by building up their career, building up muscle in the gym and building up their bank account.
Yet, the truth is that most women can be attracted instantly by simply displaying the personality traits and behaviors that naturally attract women.
Most guys just don’t understand how easy it is.
They go through life thinking that success with women is all about being super nice or super good looking, rich or having a perfect body.
Yet, if you look around, you will see that the majority of guys are just average, but they still have a hot girlfriend or wife.
Here’s the thing…
A woman can sit and listen to a nice guy give her compliment after compliment and even though she may smile and look flattered, she will walk away from him in a instant if another guy comes along and triggers her feelings of sexual attraction instead.
Triggering a woman’s attraction to your personality and behavior instantly beats 100 nice things that you can say to a woman. It also beats wearing the latest fashions and having a perfect body.
Who you are as a guy (i.e. your personality, behavior, how you think, how you communicate with her, how you behave around other people, etc) is much more important to most women than anything else you can offer.
A typical nice guy (I used to be one) hopes that, if he shows a woman that he is a nice guy and says enough nice things to her, she will see that he is trustworthy and has good intentions…and will then give him a chance.
Yet, that’s not how a woman’s attraction for a man works.
If a guy puts too much focus on being friendly and likeable around a woman, she may like him as a friend and appreciate that he’s such a good person, but she isn’t going to be feeling sexually turned on by his approach.
Why?
Niceness isn’t what makes women feel sexually attracted or aroused; it simply makes her feel nice, friendly emotions.
Being nice is only something that a woman finds appealing from a guy who has already made her feel sexually attracted to him. A guy being seen as the cherry on top or a welcome bonus, but it’s not even essential for making her feel attracted enough to kiss or have sex with a guy.
Of course, being nice is still important. For example: When a guy makes a woman feel sexually attracted to him (e.g. because he’s being confident, charismatic, masculine in his vibe and behavior, etc) and is then nice to a woman and treats her with respect, she will label him as being a “charming” guy.
However, if a guy tries to avoid sexual attraction and in the hope of being liked enough by a woman for being nice, she will simply experience friendly emotions and label him as a nice guy or friend.
What Women Really Want From a Man
Most guys go through life believing that women are only men who are good looking, rich, tall and have a perfect body.
Yes, it is true that some women are very picky and will only accept those types of men, but those women really are the minority.
The majority of women in this world are open to feeling attracted to men who aren’t rich or good looking, but who possess qualities that are equally and often even more attractive to women than looks and money.
If you take a moment to think about it, you will realize that the majority of guys in this world are not rich and don’t have male model looks, but are still able to get themselves a girlfriend or wife by displaying some of the personality traits and behaviors that naturally attract women (e.g. confidence, charisma, charm, being masculine in a way that makes her feel feminine and girly around him, etc).
A good looking or rich guy can approach a woman and say the nicest things in the world to her, but if his approach is nervous and shy, or if his body language is awkward or insecure, the woman is going to feel turned off and won’t not be interested in hanging around him for long; regardless of how good he looks.
Of course, some women (usually unattractive, desperate or drunk women) will sometimes remain interested in him just because he is good looking, but that doesn’t mean she will remain attracted to him in a long term relationship.
The majority of beautiful, high quality women will lose interest in an insecure good looking guy because he lacks the fundamental personality traits that are naturally attractive to women (e.g. confidence, emotional masculinity, high self-esteem, etc).
Mistakes Guys Make When Trying to Be Liked By Women
By now, hopefully you’ve realized that being successful with women is about making them feel attracted to you, rather than just saying nice things to them and hoping to be liked enough for it to be given a chance.
When you make women feel attracted to you first and then say some nice things, you will be considered as charming. However, if you just say nice things to a woman without first sparking her sexual desire for you, she will see you as being a nice, friendly guy that she has little or no sexual interest in.
So, if you want women to appreciate the nice things that you say to them, make sure that you focus on triggering a woman’s feelings of sexual attraction for you first. Attraction comes first and then everything else flows on naturally after that.
If you can avoid making these classic mistakes the next time you talk to an attractive woman, you will get much better results with less effort.
1. Being too nice.
Being nice doesn’t make a guy stand out from other guys, because most guys are nice to women or fairly nice to women.
As a woman goes through life, the majority of guys she meets will be nice to her, show her respect and hope to be liked by her.
Niceness doesn’t make her think, “WOW! This guy is different!”
If you listen to what some women say, it will seem as though nice guys are rare. For example: Some women will say, “All men are assholes. Why can’t I find a nice guy who will respect me and treat me like a princess?”
Yet, her statement isn’t a fact.
All men are not assholes.
What she is really saying is this, “Why can’t I find a guy who makes me feel attracted and is also nice to me?” because she isn’t attracted to typical nice guys who only make her feel friendly emotions.
Since it is so difficult for women to find a good guy who also makes her feel attracted (those guys are usually already taken), she will usually settle for the next best thing in her eyes, which is a bad boy, jerk or asshole who does make her feel attracted (e.g. to his confidence, masculinity, etc), but who isn’t a good relationship option.
When that guy dumps her, cheats on her or treats her badly, she will then begin to complain that there are no nice guys in the world and all men are assholes.
Yet, she is simply referring to the assholes that she has been dating.
What she wants is a good man who also makes her feel attracted and turned on. However, most guys don’t understand that and think that a woman is referring to all men when she says, “All men are assholes. Why can’t I find a nice guy?”
A typical nice guy will then try really hard to show a woman how much of a nice guy he is, but she will reject him anyway because he’s not doing anything to turn her on.
He’s just being nice.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with being nice to a woman, but if the main that thing that you’re doing while talking to a woman you like is trying to come up with more nice things to say to her, she will only see you as a sweet “friend” that she can hang around with until the right guy comes along to turn her on.
When you are talking to a woman that you want to begin a sexual relationship with, you have to focus on making her feel sexually attracted to you as a man, rather than trying to make her like you as a nice friend.
When you talk to a woman in a way that creates a spark between you and her, she will automatically “like” you because you are making her feel the way she wants to feel when she’s interacting with a man (i.e. attracted and turned on).
So, rather than focus your attention on thinking up lots of nice things to say to a woman you like, focus instead on creating a sexual vibe between you and her. When she is sexually attracted to you, she will be much more appreciative and excited whenever you say something sweet or nice to her.
Remember: There’s nothing wrong with being nice, or even saying nice things to a woman, but without sexual attraction being established first, she isn’t going to charmed by the nice things you say.
When you attract a woman first, all the other likeable qualities about you (e.g. you’re a good guy, you’re intelligent, you have good intentions with her, etc) will become even more appealing to her.
2. Thinking that flirting with her is wrong.
Flirting is one of the easiest ways to create a spark with a woman, build up her attraction and create sexual tension between you.
If you don’t flirt with a woman during conversation, what you’re doing is failing to create a sexual spark between yourself and her. A sexual spark is the most essential thing you need to create if you want a woman to be interested in you in that way.
You might want to show her that you’re an intelligent, nice guy who is interested in her for more than just sex, but she’s not going to care about that if you haven’t made her feel attracted to you first.
Without using flirting to build some sexual tension between you and her, a woman isn’t going to think, “Wow! This guy really stands out from all the other guys who hit on me. He says such nice things; I definitely want to begin a sexual relationship with him because he is.”
Why? Pretty much every other guy that she meets uses the “If I say nice things to her, she will like me and then give me a chance” approach, but it’s not what makes a woman feel sexually turned on.
Watch this video to understand what flirting is, how it works and why women love it so much…
3. Being afraid to use risky humor.
According to several studies into the science of human attraction, women prefer men who can make them laugh, compared to men who want to have serious, logical, polite interactions all the time.
Even though it might not be true in reality, women perceive “funny” guys as being more intelligent and honest, compared to the more serious guys who are often seen as being dim and potentially untrustworthy.
When talking to a woman, using humor is the quickest way to make her feel relaxed and at ease in your company. Of course, using humor in conversation with a woman is not about telling her joke after joke.
Here are some examples of funny things that you can say to women to make them feel attracted to you…
As you will discover from the video above, the type of humor that women are most attracted to (I call it Playfully Arrogant Humor) is seen as too risky by most guys.
Women love it when a guy has the balls to use this type of humor, as long as he keeps it playful and light. It’s not about being seriously arrogant, rude or sleazy in any way.
Instead, you are just being playful with it, which is why women find it so funny and appealing.
You Don’t Have to Say Nice Things to Women to Make Them Like You or Want You Sexually
There’s nothing wrong with saying nice things to women, but it’s not the one thing that is going to solve all of your problems with women.
Saying nice things is just seen as a bonus trait in a guy, but the main thing she is looking for is whether or not you make her feel sexually attracted or not.
If there’s no sexual attraction (or not enough of it), then there’s not going to be any sex or sexual relationship.
So, don’t waste any more of your life thinking that the only way you’re going to make women like you enough is to say a lot of nice things to them and show them how nice of a guy you are.
By now you should be clear on one thing: A woman’s attraction for a man is not limited to his physical appearance, or his wealth or status. It’s also not based on the nice things that he says to her during a conversation.
When you make a woman feel attracted to by displaying the personality traits and behaviors that are naturally attractive to women (e.g. confidence, charisma, masculine vibe, making her laugh with the right type of humor, etc), most women will overlook any perceived flaws that you might have and see you as being a hot, sexy and desirable man.
Then, when you say nice things to her, she will label you as a charming man and will be excited to hook up with you and begin a relationship.
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