When a guy asks, “Should a guy make the first move?” he might be hoping the answer is something unexpected like, “No, women have to make the first move. So relax, sit back and a beautiful woman will guide you from a conversation to a kiss, sex and into a relationship.”
Ahh, wouldn’t that be nice?
If women made the first move, we men wouldn’t have to do anything to impress women or get them to have sex with us.
We could just sit back and let women seduce us into having sex.
Wake up, wake up!
Although that would be a nice world to live in, it’s not the world that we live in.
Why?
Women are instinctively attracted to men who have the balls to make a move and go after what they want. If women rewarded shy, fearful, insecure, self-doubting men with sex, the human race would gradually lose it’s strength.
Generation after generation, women would reward wimpy guys with sex and their genes and insecure ways of thinking would spread throughout the human race.
In the real world that you and live in, women are programmed to respond to men who have the confidence to make a move and the social intelligence to know when to do it.
For example: If a guy just starts talking to a woman and immediately tries to kiss her, he definitely has the confidence to make a move, but he lacks the social intelligence to know when he should be making that move.
However, if a guy talks to a woman, makes her feel attracted to him (e.g. by making her laugh, being confident, being charismatic, having a masculine vibe that makes her feel girly, etc) and then makes a move at the right time, the woman will instinctively feel attracted to his overall package.
She will feel as though he has the social intelligence to make women feel attracted, the confidence to make a move and the awareness of when to make a move.
Instinctively, a woman will feel as though it’s better to breed with a guy like that than have sex with a nervous guy who is clueless about whether or not he should make a move.
Even though a nervous, clueless guy might be able to succeed at work in the modern world and provide her with a comfortable lifestyle, he still lacks the all-important inner qualities that women are programmed to breed into the human race.
Although a shy, nervous, insecure guy might feel like he deserves her because he is a good guy, she will instinctively feel turned off by his lack of confidence and awareness of how to naturally guide a woman to sex.
Most Women Would Rather Miss Out on Being With a Guy Than Have to Approach Him
Even if a woman really likes a guy and hopes to meet him and possibly date him, she will usually avoid making the first move by approaching him and hitting on him.
Naturally, this isn’t true for every woman. There are women who will make the first move on a guy, but in most cases this is because:
- The guy is really good looking and she wants to get him before another woman beats her to it.
- She is really drunk and doesn’t care what he or anyone else thinks about her approaching first.
- She isn’t very attractive and knows that if she doesn’t make the first move, no decent guy is going to hit on her first.
- She is a feminist who has chosen to reject her femininity in favor of being more “manly.”
- She is approaching on behalf of a friend who likes him.
- They have mutual friends, so she feels like she has an excuse to approach him first.
However, in almost all other circumstances, an attractive woman will avoid making the first move by approaching, because she doesn’t want to take on the role of being “the man” and having to guide him from a conversation to a kiss and into a sexual relationship.
If a woman has to take the lead by making the first move, the natural spark of sexual attraction (that is created when there is a clearly defined masculine/feminine dynamic between a man and woman when they first meet) will be lost.
Just like two magnets are be attracted by their opposite poles (positive and negative) and repelled by like poles (positive and positive, or negative and negative), so too will a “feminine” woman feel sexually attracted to a “masculine” man.
One of the easiest ways to attract a woman with your masculinity is to have the balls to make a move. If a woman senses that you are afraid, then it’s like putting two positive magnets together; they are repelled by each other rather than attracted.
You have to be the man and let her be the woman. If you can do that for women, you will see that they are instinctively attracted to you and willing to be sexual with you.
When a guy makes the first move by walking up and starting a conversation with a woman, it is a signal to her that he is probably a confident, masculine man who will naturally make her feel girly and feminine around him.
With the seemingly insignificant action of approaching a woman with confidence, he automatically begins to create attraction between him and her. It happens naturally and automatically without him having to do anything other than approach in a confident manner.
Yet, if a woman has to be the one to make the first move, she will never be 100% sure that he would have been confident enough to approach her if she hadn’t initiated the interaction between them in the first place.
So, rather than risk rewarding an insecure, nervous, self-doubting guy with sex and potentially a relationship, most women would rather wait for a guy who has the balls to make the first move by approaching.
If a woman notices that a guy is afraid to approach her or make a move on her during a conversation, she is left to ask herself things like, “If he is too afraid to make a move, what else will he be afraid to do in his life? Will he have the courage to strive for, and achieve his goals in life, or will he hide from his true potential because he’s afraid to take a chance?”
Are You Worried That She Isn’t Interested and Will Reject Your Attempts to Make the First Move?
Often, guys who try to avoid making the first move, usually have the wrong idea about what women are REALLY attracted to in men.
Since most men decide whether or not they’d have sex with a woman in a fraction of a second based on how good she looks, they assume that women use the same criteria to choose men.
In other words, when a guy is worried about making the first move, he’s usually thinking, “Would she be interested in a guy like me? Am I good looking enough? She’s beautiful, so why would she want a guy like me to approach her or kiss her? She could easily get herself a male model or a billionaire for a boyfriend, so why would she want me?”
Doubting themselves in that way is one of the main reasons why so many guys end up being paralyzed by fear when it comes to approaching women.
They make up excuses about why women would like them to make a first move and then become paralyzed with anxiety and fear, to the point where they can’t work up the courage to approach or move in for a kiss.
Watch this video to hear some of the excuses that guys come up with and you will then discover the REAL reason why they fail with women…
Think about the last time that you let fear stop you from making the first move on a woman you liked.
Instead of walking up to her and starting a conversation, did you allow your mind to cycle through any of these excuses?
- I’m not that good looking, so why would she want to talk to me?
- She’ll probably reject me, so what’s the point? I’m not good looking enough for her.
- Women like guys with big muscles. I’m too skinny/fat, so why would she be attracted to me?
- Women like rich guys. I don’t have a lot of money, so I can’t buy her expensive gifts or take her out to fancy restaurants.
- Women like tall guys. I’m not very tall/I’m short, so she wouldn’t want me to make a move on her anyway. I’ll just get rejected, so there’s no point even trying.
Here’s the thing…
For a woman to feel sexually attracted to a guy, she needs to first interact with him to experience his personality and assess his inner qualities.
That is what matters to most women, not looks.
Yes, a woman will sometimes look at a good looking guy and say, “Wow, he’s so handsome,” but she can then lose interest in him if she realizes that he isn’t confident…and the first sign of a man’s confidence is whether or not he approaches her and makes the first move.
Of course, some women are shallow and only care about a guy’s physical appearance or money, but the majority of women in this world are much more interested and attracted to a guy’s personality, confidence and inner qualities.
Most Women Are Attracted to Men For Reasons Other Than Looks and Money
If a guy pays too much attention to what goes on in movies, TV sitcoms, talk shows, music videos, etc., the general messages he’ll be getting is that he has to look like a supermodel, be a millionaire and live a luxury lifestyle to be good enough for attractive women.
This puts a lot of good guys off making the first move on women, because they simply don’t feel like they’re good enough for the women they find attractive.
What he doesn’t realize is that most women are MUCH EASIER to pick up than they claim to be.
Most women will go around saying that they only want a handsome billionaire with a massive penis, but the majority of guys do not fit into that category and still manage to have sex with, get into relationships with and marry those women.
If you want to be successful with women, you have to stop believing the crap that you see on TV and that you hear women say. It will confuse you, make you feel insecure and put you off making a move on women.
What you need to understand is that most women are attracted to things about men that cannot be seen, but can be experience during an interaction.
For example:
1. Confidence
Confidence is the most important thing that a woman looks for in a man. If a guy can walk up to her and make the first move in a confident way, she will feel attraction for him and will be open to having a conversation with him.
He can then make her feel more attracted by making her laugh, flirting with her, making her feel girly in response to his masculine vibe and by being charismatic and charming.
Watch this video to understand how a woman’s attraction for a man works…
As you will discover from the video above, displaying confidence is just one of the ways that you can make a woman feel attracted to you.
The more ways that you are able to make a woman feel attracted to your personality and inner qualities, the more attractive you will be.
Most women only need to feel attracted to 5-10 personality traits and inner qualities to feel like it’s a good idea to kiss you, have sex with you and get into a relationship with you.
2. Masculinity
These days, a lot of guys have been brainwashed by the media and by women into thinking, behaving and feeling like more of a woman than a man.
For example: A guy will talk to a woman he likes and rather than being his natural, masculine self, he will suppress his masculinity to be nice, friendly, neutral and extra respectful towards her.
There’s nothing wrong with being nice to a woman, as long as you do not suppress your masculinity while doing so.
Watch this video to understand why…
As you will discover from the video above, being nice to a woman is a good thing as long as you are also making her feel attracted.
One of the easiest ways to make a woman feel naturally attracted to you, is to not suppress your masculine vibe, feelings, thinking, behavior and attitude around her.
Rather than suppressing your masculinity to be a soft, nice guy, you should embrace your masculinity and be a strong, good guy. When you do that, she will naturally feel attracted and turned on by you.
Making the first move on a woman is another way of expressing your masculinity. A woman will often refer to this as being “swept off her feet” by a real man who is masculine enough to allow to relax into being a feminine woman.
On the other hand, when a man sits on the sidelines and waits for the woman to sweep him off his feet, he is literally robbing her of the exciting experience of feeling feminine in response to his masculinity.
3. Approach to life
A man’s approach to life starts with his ability to make a move and take action when he sees a great opportunity in front of him.
If he is the kind of guy who allows his fear and self-doubt to control him, chances are high that he will waste most of his life hiding from his true potential as a man as well.
By approaching a woman or making a move to kiss her (after you’ve first made her feel attracted to you), you are demonstrating to her that you’re the type of “go getter” guy who has a higher chance of living a great life compared to a scared, fearful guy who is afraid to make a move.
Make Her Feel Lucky to Be Chosen By You
If you’re asking, “Should a guy make the first move?” it could also be because you’ve had some bad experiences with women in the past.
You might have tried making a move on a woman, only to have her reject you or even laugh at your suggestions of going on a date or starting a relationship.
This is what happened to a guy when he asked out a woman at work, only to have her turn around and call him STUPID for suggesting it.
Have a listen to his story here and you will discover what he did to turn his life around and get a hot girlfriend…
As you will discover by listening to the clip above, it’s critically important to start off by making a woman feel attracted to you first, before you try to make any move on her (e.g. get a phone number, kiss her, etc).
The guy in the audio clip automatically attracted the girl he approached because he came across as being confident and masculine.
Even though he has a lisp when he talks, wears glasses and isn’t very good looking, he was still able to get a hot girlfriend by attracting her in OTHER ways.
If you are the type of guy who is worried about making a move on a woman, it may be because you feel insecure about attractiveness and hope that if a woman approaches you first, she’s less likely to reject you for not being good looking enough.
Yet, if you don’t know how to attract her when she approaches, you’re probably not going to get anywhere with her.
If you want to have your choice of women or be able to effortlessly go from a conversation to kiss, to sex and into a relationship, you need to make women feel attracted to your personality and inner qualities and then have the confidence to make a move when you see a great opportunity in front of you.
Not all women will make it completely obvious that they want you to make a move though.
For example:
Even if a woman feels a lot of attraction for you and is hoping that you make a move, she might respond in one of the following ways:
- Pretend that she’s not very interested, as a way of testing your confidence.
- Pretend that she’s not very interested, as a way of checking how interested you are in her and how willing you are to pursue her.
- Be interested in you, but not really know how to show you that other than to keep talking to you, texting you, etc in a friendly way.
So, if you like a woman and you want to make a move on her, don’t waste time looking for 100% clear signals that she wants you to make a move.
You need to make her feel attracted and then have the confidence to make a move when the time is right.
If she rejects your attempts to make a move, just smile, remain confident and say in a light-hearted, easy-going way, “Well, I guess I misread your signals.”
What then?
Remain confident.
If you have made her feel attracted to you, then she is attracted to you. Just because she didn’t want you to make a move at the moment you did, it doesn’t mean she won’t want it 1 minute later or 1 hour later.
One of the most important parts of being successful with women is believing in yourself and moving forward from one step to the next.
If you need some help on how to make a move and avoid rejection, please click around my site and keep learning. All the answers and solutions that you need to succeed with women are right here, right now.
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