Sometimes it does work to simply ask an ex out again because she has been missing you and hoping that you’d make a move.
Yet, in many cases, it doesn’t work or results in her wanting to cut you out of her life completely.
So, before you make the move to ask out your ex, just be aware of these 10 possible outcomes if you do try:
1. She is happy that you asked her out because she has been missing you
In a case like that, you just need to focus on being attractive to her (e.g. being confident, assertive in a loving way, using humor and flirting), so she continues to feel drawn to you and gets back into a relationship with you.
She might begin to feel nervous, or unsure if things seem to be moving very quickly and if that happens, you just need to maintain your confidence and be relaxed and easygoing when interacting with her.
Don’t put any pressure on her to make a decision.
Instead, just let her naturally feel drawn to you and want you back.
Another possible outcome of you asking out your ex again is…
2. She secretly is interested, but plays hard to get to check your interest level
In other words, do you want her back because you have genuine feelings for her and truly believe the relationship will be better this time around, or do you only want her back to stop feeling like a reject who got dumped?
When you get her back, do you plan on dumping her to get revenge, or are you truly interested in her and honestly want to keep the relationship together from now on?
She wants to try and figure that out, based on how you react (e.g. do you continue re-attracting her and moving things forward even though she doesn’t seem fully interested, or do you simply give up and not ask her out again?).
So, if your ex plays hard to get when you ask her out, but you sense that she is secretly interested, just make sure that you remain calm, confident and focus on continuing to be attractive to her (e.g. confident, emotionally manly, playfully challenging, turning her bad mood into something you can laugh about together).
When she notices that you’re not giving up at the first sign of resistance and are being attractive in your behavior, she will naturally want to give you another chance, rather than playing too hard to get and losing you to another woman.
3. She is interested, but plays hard to get to test your confidence level
This usually happens when one of a woman’s main reasons for breaking up with her boyfriend, was due to him being too insecure.
So, before she opens back up to him, she pretends not to be interested to see how he reacts.
If he reacts by losing confidence and doubting himself, she will know that he’s still the same insecure guy she dumped and he hasn’t changed, or leveled up since the breakup.
So, she will then push him away and continue to move on.
This is why, it is essential that you always maintain your confidence around her, regardless of what she says or does to throw you off, or make you doubt yourself.
Let her see that you’ve become emotionally bulletproof since the breakup and are now an emotionally stronger man that she can look up to, feel proud of, feel protected by and rely on.
If you let her feel that, based on you not losing confidence in response to her tests, she will naturally feel an intense rush of respect and attraction for you.
As a result, she will want to say yes and give you another chance.
Another possible reaction to asking your ex out is…
4. She isn’t interested, rejects you and says that you and her should just be friends
Some guys don’t know how to handle it when a woman says something like that.
For example: A guy might say, “No, I can’t just be friends with you. That would be too hard for me. If we can’t be together, then I won’t be able to deal with talking to you as a friend.”
Yet, when a guy has an ‘all or nothing’ mentality (i.e. get back together or nothing at all), he literally throws away his best chance at re-attracting her and getting her back.
Why?
If an ex is open to being ‘friends,’ then you have a perfect excuse to text her, call her, let her see your posts on social media (e.g. of you having fun, looking confident and happy without her, so she feels like she is losing a better version of you) and get her to catch up to say hi.
When that happens, you can re-attract her and get another chance.
So, if your ex rejects your attempt to ask her out and only wants to be friends, make sure that you take her up on that offer.
Make sure that you have each other added on social media and don’t be afraid to text her, or call her.
Important: Don’t just interact with her like a friend though.
If you’re going to interact with her, you have to behave in a way that will attract her to you (e.g. being playfully challenging, using flirting, being manly, being confident), rather than making her feel neutral (e.g. just being nice, friendly, polite, listening to her, gossiping).
When you make her feel attracted, she wants to be with you.
When you make her feel neutral, she feels like you and her are just friends now and assumes that there’s just no spark between you anymore.
There can be a spark, but you have to create it by behaving in an attractive way.
That’s how it works.
5. She isn’t interested, coldly rejects you and asks you to leave her alone from now on
If your ex reacts in that way, you might then think it’s impossible to get her back.
Yet, it’s not.
In most ex back cases, all it takes is a new spark of sexual and romantic attraction and the woman then drops her guard and opens back up to her ex.
Here are some ways that you can create a new spark:
- Use playfully challenging humor to change her mood from being closed off and cold, to happy and open. For example: You talk to her and she seems cold and distant. You then laugh and say in an assertive, but loving way, “Well, someone’s in a great mood today. You’re a ball of energy. You’re just so much fun to talk to.” Alternatively, you can laugh and say in an assertive, but loving way say, “Come on. You don’t hate me that much. I know there’s still a little part of you that thinks I’m hot.” Then, when she smiles in response to what you said, you say, “See – there it is. She’s in there somewhere” and have a laugh with her.
- Maintain your confidence if she acts cold and pretends not to be interested anymore, rather than seeming insecure, rejected or doubtful that you have a chance now.
- Use flirting to change the interaction from neutral to romantic and sexual. For example: If she is wearing something that makes her look sexy, or very pretty, you can say, “You look sexy with that on, but would look even better with it off” and have a laugh with her. Alternatively, “You look pretty today. It’s cute that you got all dressed up to impress me” and have a laugh.
- Feel secure in your masculinity and don’t allow her to dominate you with her confident personality.
When you create a new spark, she will naturally want to give you a chance, even if she was initially saying, “No way.”
The reason why is that, at this point (i.e. after she has broken up with you), all that really matters to her now are her feelings.
If you make her experience a new spark of attraction that excites and interests her, she will want to give you another chance so she gets to experience more of it.
Not because she wants to be nice to you, or do you a favor.
It’s about her feelings and what she wants, so give her the feelings she really wants and she’ll go out with you again.
6. She can tell that you haven’t changed, so she feels annoyed at you for asking for another chance
This can also lead to her feeling that you:
- Are wasting her time because you’re offering her the same kind of relationship experience that she left and no longer wants to be a part of.
- Aren’t willing to change and improve, possibly because you continue to take her presence in your life for granted, don’t care what she wants, or don’t care enough about her feel motivated to change.
- Expect her to accept second best and be happy about it.
- Don’t think she deserves anything more.
If she gets that sense, she might then block your number, or unfriend you on social media, to limit your access to her.
Another possible reaction…
7. She is interested, but doesn’t want to commit to anything right away
Before she commits to anything, she may want to ensure that you’ve leveled up in the ways that are important to her (e.g. you’re more confident now, know how to make her feel like a real woman, don’t become emotionally sensitive when she’s not being nice or supportive, know how to flirt with her better to create a stronger sense of sexual tension between you).
8. She is indifferent about it
In other words, she doesn’t really care if you and her get back together or not.
In a case like that, it will usually mean that her current feelings for you are neutral (i.e. she sees you more like a friend, doesn’t feel much of a sexual or romantic spark).
So, if you and her don’t get back together, it won’t be a huge deal for her.
If you want her to care, you need to focus on sparking her feelings by being attractive (e.g. using humor to make her feel good to be talking to you again, being flirtatious to create sexual tension, being more manly in your attitude, conversation style and behavior).
The more attracted you make her feel, the more interested she will be.
9. She initially agrees to it, but then changes her mind when she notices that you haven’t changed much
This is why it’s so important to make real changes or improvements to yourself, prior to talking to her.
It only takes a few days to a week (at the most) to achieve that, if you learn how to be more attractive to your ex and then apply what you’ve learned.
If you’re unsure of what you might need to improve on to be more attractive, here are a few questions to get you started:
- Does your approach to the relationship naturally result in her wanting to be a good, loving woman to you, or can she can treat you as badly as she wants and you’ll just put up with it?
- Do you make her feel sexy and desirable when she’s with you, or does she feel neutral, turned off or more like a buddy to you?
- Do you maintain your confidence when she isn’t being nice, warm and friendly (i.e. if she’s being moody, cold, teasing you, putting you down, rejecting you), or do you become insecure and unsure of yourself?
Women don’t spell these things out for men.
As a man, you’re expected to just understand and then do it.
If you don’t, then you eventually get dumped.
It doesn’t matter how well the relationship started off either (e.g. you and her were so in love, you went on holidays together, promised to be together forever).
If you can’t offer a woman the kind of attraction experience she wants in a relationship, she simply won’t remain motivated to stay with you, or get back with you after dumping you.
10. She agrees to it, loves the changes in you and the relationship between you is better than ever before
Falling back in love after a breakup is one of the most amazing experiences for both the man and woman.
The fact that you and her have a history together and used to be in love, but then broke up, worked things out and got back together, results in a more mature, developed connection between you.
If you have truly leveled up as a man, she will feel much more respect, attraction and love you than she previously did, which will feel amazing for both you and her.
So, don’t be afraid to go through the process of getting her back.
It will be one of the best things you ever do in life.
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