Here are 5 questions to ask yourself, so you can then make a concrete decision:
1. Do you feel as though the relationship would be even better if you could get another chance with her?
Some couples get into a relationship with each other without knowing how to make it last for life.
They’re not prepared to deal with all the problems that occur as the relationship begins to settle down (e.g. the power struggle, disagreements, insecurity) and as a result, the relationship begins to go downhill and fall apart until a break up finally happens.
Yet, what they didn’t realize is that problems in a relationship don’t necessarily mean that the relationship isn’t working, can’t work or that it has to end.
In fact, successful couples who stay together for life understand that no-one is perfect and that arguments, disagreements and mistakes (even big ones) happen from time to time.
So, if you’re wondering if you should forget about your ex and just meet other women, could it be because you, or her, had unrealistic expectations of what a real relationship should be like?
Did you one or both of you assume that a relationship had to be perfect all the time and if it wasn’t, then it was heading for a break up and had to end?
More importantly, now that you know that problems and mistakes in relationships are all part of the growing process and can actually make the love even stronger in the long-term, don’t you think you’d do a much better job being her boyfriend this time around?
I think you would because you’re a more emotionally mature man than you were before.
True?
This is why you shouldn’t give up on your ex just yet.
You owe it to yourself (and to her) to give it one more shot.
After all, what do you have to lose?
If it doesn’t work out between you and her when you get back together, you can always go on to meet other women.
However, if it does work out, then you’ll have successfully gotten back with your ideal woman and made a huge success of new your relationship with her.
You will also have grown and developed so much more as a man, by going through the transformational ex back process.
Of course, if deep down, you feel that you can’t be bothered to put in the effort that’s required to make a relationship work with your ex, then maybe it’s time to move on.
Maybe it’s time to find yourself a woman who you want to be with through the good times as well as the rough times, because she’s worth it to you.
Another question to ask yourself is…
2. Have you felt the same kind of attraction for new women that you’ve met, or are you more attracted to your ex?
If you’re like most guys, chances are high that when you see a hot woman walking down the street, you can’t stop yourself from feeling attracted to her.
Attraction is a natural reaction that men and women have when they encounter appealing traits in each other.
It can’t be turned off.
However, even though there are potentially millions of other women that you might feel drawn to, if you feel as though the attraction you felt for your ex far outweighs what you feel for other women, then you probably need to focus on getting her back rather than meeting other women.
On the other hand, if other women seem equally attractive to you and you feel drawn to them in the same, or a similar way to your ex, then it may be a sign that you should go ahead and meet new women, have sex and see how you feel afterwards.
Besides, dating other women might be just what you need to convince you that your ex is truly the woman for you (i.e. you might end up having sex with a few women, only to find yourself still missing your ex and the connection that you and her shared).
Warning: Don’t make the mistake of thinking that your ex will wait around for you for months, while you try to decide whether or not she’s the right woman for you.
So, if you do decide to meet other women, know that if it doesn’t work out for you down the line and you decide to get back with your ex, she may not be available anymore.
Another question to ask yourself is…
3. How happy would you be if you got another chance with her?
If getting back with your ex would make you feel happier than you’ve felt in a long time, or maybe even in life, then you should focus on getting her back.
However, if getting her back would make you have a “whatever” type of feeling, then it’s best that you just meet new women and move on.
Another question to ask yourself is…
4. Have you improved the things about you that turned her off?
For her to break up with you in the way she did, there must’ve been some aspect of your thinking or behavior that really turned her off about you.
For example: A woman might break up with a guy because he’s too childish and immature and has no direction in life.
So, to get her back, he will need to change and improve in ways that will make her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for him.
Yet, what if he doesn’t want to do that?
For example: A guy might decide that he likes who he is (e.g. carefree, irresponsible, having fun in his life without being committed to any one thing, being reckless, drinking and partying all the time, playing video games all weekend, not working on achieving anything big in life and just cruising through life).
In a case like that, getting back with an ex woman who hates those things about him isn’t a good idea and probably won’t work.
So, a guy like that should focus on meeting other women who will love him for who he is.
On the other hand, if he realizes that his ex was right to break up with him and that he needs to start being more of a man and getting his life together, then the relationship can work when he gets her back.
So, if you have changed and improved some of the things that turned your ex off, don’t give up on the idea of getting your ex back just because she may have said that she doesn’t want you anymore.
It’s actually up to you to make the decision about whether or not you are going to seduce her back into a relationship.
Another question to ask yourself is…
5. Have you come to realize her true, secret reasons for ending the relationship?
A woman won’t always tell a guy her all of her reasons for ending the relationship.
Instead, she might only ever say something like, “Sorry, but I just don’t feel the same way about you anymore” or, “It’s not you, it’s me. I need some time apart to figure out what I really want in my life.”
How about you?
Did your ex explain exactly why she was breaking up with you and what you’d need to change and improve to get her back, or did she end it with a vague reason of some sort (e.g. “I don’t think this is working, so it’s best to end it now”)?
If you’re unsure of her real reasons for dumping you, then you may have been trying to get her back by offering her all the wrong things (e.g. promising to change things that don’t matter to her, changing your physical appearance by going to the gym or buying new clothes as a way of attracting her, even though she was turned off by your emotional weakness or insecurity and it had nothing to do with your appearance).
As a result, she would have rejected your attempts to get her back and told you to just leave her alone.
Naturally, that may have caused you to feel dejected and possibly made you wonder things like, “Am I pushing for something that will never happen? Should I forget about my ex and just meet other women? No matter what I do, she doesn’t want me back. What can I do other than just move on?”
What you can do is understand her real reasons for leaving you and then make changes and improvements based on that.
Then, interact with her, re-attract her, seduce her and get her back into a relationship with you, or at least have sex with her again and then see how you both feel after that.
3 Mistakes Guys Make When Trying to Decide if They Should Get an Ex Back, or Forget About Her and Meet Other Women
Sometimes a guy finds himself torn between wanting his ex back and moving on, because he isn’t sure how to get her back.
He misses her and wants her back, but everything that he has tried so far hasn’t worked, so moving on seems like the only options.
As a result, he ends up making one or more of the following mistakes that further reduce his chances of getting her back…
1. Sending out feeler texts to see if she is interested and then losing confidence when she doesn’t reply or show much interest
It’s only natural that a guy might feel a bit rejected if he sends his ex woman a text to say hello and see how she’s been since the break up and she doesn’t reply, or responds with something like, “I’m fine” or, “What do you want?”
He may then think to himself, “Well I guess I have my answer. She’s over me and I have no chance with her anymore. I should just forget about her now and meet other women. That’s not really what I want, but it seems to be what she wants, so I need to accept that.”
Yet, thinking like that only causes him to lose confidence in himself and in his value to her, which isn’t going to help him get her back.
What he doesn’t realize is that just because she doesn’t seem excited to be hearing from him, it doesn’t mean that she’s not secretly happy to be hearing from him.
He is simply reading the text in a negative light because he lacks confidence.
She could be saying, “I’m fine” and smiling from ear to ear and feeling happy that he is contacting her, or she could be rolling her eyes and feeling annoyed that he is contacting her.
Either option is possible, but because it’s just text, he has to assume that tone of voice that she would be replying with.
Since he lacks confidence, he will lean towards assuming a more negative tone of voice and will then begin to feel as though he doesn’t have much or any chance to get her back.
In terms of her not replying at all; sometimes a woman doesn’t want to reply to her ex’s initial feeler text.
For example: She doesn’t want to come across as too eager to hear from him, she doesn’t want to make it too easy for him to get her back, or she is testing to see if he is confident enough to pursue her even though she’s being unresponsive.
So, if you lose confidence when she doesn’t reply or doesn’t seem very interested when she replies, you’ll never find out the truth.
Then, you may end up missing out on your chance of getting back with her because you didn’t believe in yourself in that moment.
Don’t make that mistake.
Believe in yourself and in your value to her and don’t give up if she doesn’t make it super easy for you right away.
Remain confident, re-attract her, seduce her and get her back.
Another mistake to avoid making is…
2. Not preparing to attract her in new, exciting ways and instead, expecting to be able to get her back by offering the same old attraction experience as before
Sometimes when a guy gets broken up with, he gets so caught up thinking about how terrible he feels, or how difficult it will be to convince his ex to give him another chance, that he remains stuck at the same level he was at when she broke up with him.
In other words, rather than quickly learn from his mistakes and make some attractive changes to re-attract his ex, he stays the same.
Then, when he then attempts to get her back, she doesn’t feel a new spark with him and rejects him.
He may then end up thinking that he should just forget about her and meet other women, even though his gut instinct is telling him that he should get her back and enjoy a new relationship with her.
So, remember: If you don’t use a different approach with her, she probably not going to be interested in getting back into the kind of relationship that she broke up and got away from.
This is why it’s so important that you’re fully prepared to re-attract her when you meet up with her in person.
You’ve got to be ready to give her the kind of attraction experience that will cause her to feel like she just has to give you another chance, or else she will regret it for the rest of her life.
Make her feel compelled to at least hug you and kiss you again.
When you get to that point, her feelings of attraction will begin flooding back and she will begin to feel sparks of love for you again.
As a result, you can then get her back and enjoy a new relationship with her.
From there, you can decide whether or not you want to stay with her, or dump her and start meeting new women.
Another mistake to avoid making is…
3. Waiting too long to begin the ex back process and losing confidence in himself as a result
After a break up, a guy might decide to wait for 1-3 months before attempting to get his ex woman back.
For example: Some guys think, “I need to heal from the pain of being dumped, before I approach my ex again.”
Other guys think, “Maybe if I give her some time apart, she will start missing me and then be more open to getting back together.”
A guy might then wait around for weeks, or even months, while he tries to build up the courage to start the ex back process with her.
Yet, the longer he waits, the more he begins to doubt his chances with her.
He then starts thinking things like, “What if she doesn’t want me back after all this time? What if I contact her and she tells me that she’s with someone else now? Maybe it’s probably too late to get her back now. I’m sure that she won’t want me now, so maybe I should forget about her and just meet other women.”
Yet, when he thinks about getting out there and approaching and meeting women, he realizes that he doesn’t want that.
He wants her.
Yet, he’s too afraid to contact her and begin the ex back process, so he’s stuck.
He then spirals into a cycle of negative, insecure thinking, which eats away at whatever remaining confidence he has in himself.
If he then tries to get his ex back or meet other women, he will usually get rejected because they will all sense his emotional weakness and feel turned off by it.
Here’s the thing…
Women are attracted to confident men who believe in themselves.
Likewise, women are turned off by insecure men who doubt themselves.
So, if you’ve been waiting a long time to start the ex back process and have been losing confidence along the way, you must begin to build your confidence back up right now so you can naturally re-attract her.
When you believe in yourself and in your value to her and other women, not only will you be able to attract other beautiful women if you want to, but you will also be able to make your feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for you.
She will sense the change in you and will feel attracted to it, even if she doesn’t openly admit it.
She will feel as though you really are different now and when you build on her feelings as you talk to her, she will realize that there is still something between you and her.
As a result, you can seduce her and get her back into a relationship, or at least get to a kiss and then sex to see how you both feel after that.
So, if you’ve been wondering, “Should I forget about my ex and just meet other women?” because you’ve lost confidence in yourself and your ability to re-attract her, then start by believing in yourself right now.
When you do, everything will begin to change for you.
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