Some women respond better if an ex plays it cool and doesn’t try to get her back.
Yet, the vast majority of women need an ex guy to follow through and get her back, or else she will just move on.
That said, every woman is different.
So, here are 7 potential outcomes you may face if you play it cool with your ex and don’t ever try to get her back…
1. She sees it as meaning that you are no longer interested, so she moves on
In some cases, even though a woman broke up with a guy, she still waits and hopes that he will try and get her back.
For example: Some reasons why might be…
- She still has feelings for him and regrets her decision to break up.
- She only broke up with him to shock him into changing and improving (e.g. stop being so lazy and begin making some progress in life, stop being so clingy all the time, stop taking her for granted and go back to being the loving, attentive man she fell in love with originally).
- To stop him from being so vague and emotionally distant and get him to commit to her.
- She was going through a stressful time in her life (e.g. she was experiencing problems at work/university/with her friends or family) and it caused her to act irrationally (i.e. break up with her man).
Of course, in most cases, a woman won’t ever say she made a mistake to her ex, or even hint at it.
She will just wait and hope that he has the courage to make a move and get her back.
So, when he plays it cool and doesn’t try to get her back, it can come as a shock to her.
She can take it as a sign that he’s not interested anymore and is likely moving on already.
Naturally, that can make her feel hurt and rejected.
She may then use the pain she’s feeling as motivation to quickly move on too (e.g. by getting into a rebound relationship with a new man).
2. She regrets losing you, gets in contact and tries to get you back
It’s like the old saying, “You don’t appreciate what you have until it’s gone.”
So, in some cases, a woman might take her relationship with her guy a little bit for granted.
For example: She might…
- Notice all her single friends having a lot of fun going to clubs, bars or house parties. As a result, she begins to see her relationship as a bit boring and feels as though she’s missing out.
- Blow the problems in the relationship out of proportion and expect everything to be perfect all the time.
- Put most or even all of the blame for her unhappiness on her boyfriend and refuse to take responsibility for her mistakes.
- Experience a bit of flirting with another guy (e.g. at work, university, the gym) and start to wonder if she can do better than her boyfriend.
This can lead to her breaking up with him.
Yet, once the initial excitement of being single again wears off, she may realize that what she had was actually a good thing.
Single life isn’t as fun or exciting as she initially thought, so she misses him and what they had together.
She may then wait a little bit to see if he will try and get her back.
However, when he doesn’t contact her, it can cause her to panic and worry about losing him to another woman.
So, she contacts him (e.g. sends out a feeler text to say hi) to see what happens from there.
If he responds, she will do her best to be nice and try to seduce him back into a relationship with her.
He can then easily re-attract her and get her back.
3. She doesn’t care because she isn’t attracted to you anymore
When a woman breaks up with her boyfriend, it’s usually because she has reached a point where she doesn’t feel much, or any, sexual attraction and romantic love for him anymore.
As a result, she has likely prepared herself mentally to move on and make a fresh start without him in her life.
For example: She might…
- Tell some of her girlfriends that she is getting ready to dump him and prepare them to give her the emotional support she needs to move on quickly (e.g. go out and party together, introduce her to single guys that she can start dating).
- Start flirting and opening up to guys who are interested in her (e.g. someone at work, the gym, in her neighborhood), so she has a new guy lined up right away.
- Start using dating apps and lining up a bunch of dates with guys she finds attractive.
As a result, when she finally does dump him, she has already moved on mentally and is now just going through with the physical part (e.g. moving out of his place or kicking him out of hers, cutting off contact with him, unfriending him on social media).
So, if you then just play it cool and don’t try to get her back, she simply doesn’t care (or even notice) much at all.
It’s actually not something she spends a lot of time thinking or worrying about, because she doesn’t have feelings for him anymore.
Instead, she just focuses on moving on and enjoying her life without him.
4. She wants to contact you, but fears getting rejected, so she just moves on
Sometimes the breakup can be a wake-up call for a woman.
She realizes that she does miss her ex and that he was actually a good guy after all (i.e. their relationship problems weren’t as bad as she initially imagined).
As a result, she starts wanting him back, or at least wanting to interact with him to see if they can fix things.
Initially, she might think that he wants that too and will contact her and try to get her back.
So, when he doesn’t, she may feel tempted to contact him instead.
However, in most cases, even though a woman does want to get back with her ex, she rarely makes a move if he’s playing it cool and ignoring her.
The reason is, she’s afraid of being rejected by him (e.g. if he’s not interested anymore, has already moved on and has found a replacement woman).
Additionally, she’s worried that if she does contact him and they get back together again, he might decide to dump her to get revenge on her for breaking up with him in the first place.
She will then become the one who got dumped.
So, rather than put herself in that position, she just forces herself to get over him and move on instead
5. She takes it as a sign that you and her weren’t meant to be
Regardless of how certain a woman is that breaking up with her boyfriend is the right decision, it doesn’t mean she’s 100% against giving him another chance if he can restart her sexual and romantic feelings again.
This is one of the main reasons why so many couples break up and get back together again, often more than once.
Most women will give a guy another chance if he’s able to re-attract her (i.e. interact with her and behave in an emotionally attractive way that causes her to feel new sparks of sexual and romantic attraction).
Being willing to give a guy another chance has a lot to do with a woman’s natural instincts of wanting to find one man, get him to fall in love with her and then keep him for life (e.g. so that he can take care of her, they can have a family together).
Most women don’t want to start over with a new guy and potentially find out that he’s not suitable, if there’s a chance of making things work with a man she has already invested a lot of her time in.
So, if her ex decides to play it cool and not try to get her back, it can cause her to think, “If it was meant to be, he wouldn’t have let me go so easily. Clearly, we weren’t meant to stay together after all.”
She will then likely begin dating and hooking up with other guys to help herself feel better and get over him.
6. She initially cares, but then meets a new guy who makes her feel more attracted and she then focuses on him
Being ignored by her ex can sometimes cause a woman to feel annoyed, upset, or even a little bit rejected.
It might even shock her into realizing that she still has some feelings for him.
That can cause her to wonder if she should call or text him to say hi and see how he responds.
However, in most cases, a woman will be nervous about making the first move.
She might then decide to:
- Wait for him to contact her first so she knows he’s interested in trying to fix things and get the relationship back together again.
- Keep busy (e.g. by going out with her single friends, focusing on her career or studies) to try to distract herself from thinking about him all the time.
- Take up a new hobby, interest or sports activity (e.g. join a gym, take up horse riding, join a Meetup group in her area).
However, while she’s busy distracting herself, she unexpectedly meets a new guy who sparks her feeling of sexual attraction.
Then, because he’s actually present in her life and is around to flirt, make her laugh and smile, take her out on dates and regularly calls or texts, she starts to fall for him.
This naturally causes her to stop thinking about her ex all the time.
She stops missing her ex and thinking about getting back together again because she is now focused on building a relationship with her new guy who is making her feel sexually and romantically attracted to him.
As a result, she moves on and forgets all about her ex.
7. She decides to give you a certain amount of time and then move on after that
For some women that might be a week, two weeks or a month.
Alternatively, it might be at a certain date in the month.
For example:
If it’s the 8th of July, she might look at her calendar and say, “I’ll give him to the 15th and if he hasn’t called, I’m going on a date with that guy from work who is always asking me out.”
“It’s my birthday/Halloween/New Year’s Eve in 1 month. If He doesn’t contact me by then, I’m going to a party and hook up with a new guy then and there.”
In most cases, a woman will stick to her decision to move on if she doesn’t hear from her ex in time.
She will then usually push herself to go out and hook up with a new man as quickly as possible.
8. She moves on, but always misses you and wishes you’d gotten her back
Even when a woman does still have feelings for her ex and wants him back, she will rarely make a move if he’s playing it cool and not trying to get her back.
Some common reasons why might be:
- She feels betrayed and hurt that he let her go so easily without even putting up a small fight to get her back.
- She feels too proud to go crawling back to him, even though she wants to.
- She doesn’t want to risk being rejected by him if he’s not interested anymore.
- She wants him to be man enough to take the lead in the ex back process and guide them both back into a relationship, rather than making it easy for him by making the first move and always feeling like she has power over him.
- She doesn’t want to be left behind by him if he’s already got a new girlfriend and has moved on, while she’s still waiting around for him to get her back.
As a result, she forces herself to move on and begin dating new men.
Eventually, she gets into a new relationship.
However, in the back of her mind, she often wonders what would have happened if her ex had the courage to make a move and get her back.
She misses him and never feels completely satisfied with her relationships with other men.
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