Yes, you should make peace with your ex.
Here are 5 reasons why you should do it ASAP:
1. You can then get her back
If you don’t make peace with your ex, you both might continue feel negative emotions when you think about each other (e.g. anger, annoyance, resentment, disappointment, betrayal, sadness, regret), which can then negatively affect your chances of getting each other back, or ruin your happiness in your next relationship with someone else (i.e. because you will be missing your ex, or still feel regret about how things went down).
On the other hand, if you make peace with your ex and you both genuinely forgive each other, it will wipe the slate clean for both of you.
Both of you will be able to look at each other in a new light and see each other for who you are now, rather than who you used to be.
From that clean slate, you can then start rebuilding her feelings of respect, attraction and love for you and get her back.
So, to make your ex begin to see you in a more positive light, start by apologizing to her (preferably face-to-face) about what happened.
For example: You might say something along the lines of, “I just want to say that I’m sorry for what happened between us. I now realize that the way I handled things was wrong and I could have done a much better job of it. To help us both heal from the break up, I feel as though it’s in both of our best interests to make peace with each other, so we aren’t carrying the emotional baggage into any new relationship we have with someone else. I want both of us to be free to be happy again. If you think about it, you will realize that what I’m saying is true. If we don’t make peace with each other, you probably won’t fully trust other guys in the future, which won’t be good for you. So, how about it? Can you let go of the past so that we can both move forward without holding onto old negativity and grudges? Let’s make peace with each other, so we can let go of any negative feelings and get on with our lives in a more positive way.”
By encouraging her to let go of what happened between in the past, it helps her to begin to see you for who you are now; a new, improved and more mature man.
If you also make her feel attracted to you as you talk to her (e.g. be very confident, make her laugh, flirt with her), something interesting happens.
She doesn’t want to let go of you.
Suddenly, she stops thinking of you as her horrible ex and starts seeing you as a man who is now emotionally mature and confident enough to make peace with her and allow her to move on and enjoy her life without you.
When that happens, her defenses come down and she becomes more open to feeling attracted to you again and to saying, “Yes” if you ask her to catch up for a coffee to say hi.
If you don’t ask her to catch up after saying something like that to her, she will go away feeling drawn to you and may not know why.
As a result, you will almost certainly get a text from her.
In most cases, a text from an ex woman in a situation like that will be her subtle way of trying to tell you, “I want more. Please text with me, get me on a call, make me smile and laugh and then ask me to catch up with you. Please…I miss you.”
Of course, you don’t have to look at her text in that way.
You can be insecure if you want to and assume that she is texting you for no reason, or just to be nice.
However, I don’t recommend that you think in an insecure way if you want to get her back.
When it comes to attracting women, it’s always best to think in a confident way, so you can then take confident action, rather than hesitating, doubting and missing out on the great opportunity that is presenting itself to you.
Always remember that women are naturally attracted to confidence, so it’s never a good idea to be insecure or self-doubting around a woman.
If you want your ex back, then be confident, believe in yourself and attract her back.
Another reason why you should make peace with your ex is because…
2. You will clear your conscience
Making peace with your ex allows you to clear your conscience (i.e. feel free of guilt).
Not making peace with your ex causes you to live with regret, worry, stress, disappointment and sadness about how things ended between you and her.
For example: Months or years from now when you’re still not over her, you may find yourself thinking something like, “I should have made peace with my ex. I handled the situation in such an immature and childish way back…I still feel embarrassed by it. I wish I could go back and fix things between her and I. I wish I could apologize and get her to forgive me. I hate living with regrets, but it’s too late to fix things with her now.”
It’s not too late.
There is always time for forgiveness, but if you want to get your ex back, it’s better to get it done sooner than later.
If you leave it too long, you or her might completely move on with new people and there won’t be an opportunity to talk and make peace with each other.
So, go ahead and do the right thing while you can.
Regardless of whether your ex accepts your apology and forgives you, or even says something along the lines of, “I don’t care what you have to say. I hate you and I will never forgive you!” you will at least have a clear conscience knowing that you tried to make peace with her.
If she reacts in a negative way like that, it will then be her who has a heavy conscience and wants to make peace with you.
If she reacts in a positive way, make sure that you believe in yourself and get her to meet up with you in person, so you can re-attract her, seduce her and hook up with her again.
After that, you and her can decide what to do from there.
Another reason why you should make peace with your ex is because…
3. She will be impressed by your maturity
All over the world, women are instinctively attracted to certain qualities in a man.
For example: A woman will almost always choose a confident, emotionally strong, emotionally mature man over an insecure, emotionally weak, childish and immature man.
It’s just how her instincts work.
So, when you take the initiative and make peace with your ex (especially if she is initially being closed off and difficult), even if she won’t admit it, she will secretly be impressed by your emotional maturity.
She can then begin to think things like, “Maybe I’m being too hard on him. After all, it takes a mature and emotionally strong man to admit his mistakes and apologize like that. Maybe he really has changed after all.”
She then drops her guard a bit and becomes open to talking to you again over the phone, or seeing you in person.
Then, the more you interact with her, the more chances you have to restore her feelings of respect, attraction and love for you and get her back.
Another reason why you should make peace with your ex is because…
4. She’s probably hoping that you make peace with her
It would be nice if your ex came out and said, “Look, I know you feel bad about what happened, so let me make it easy for you by telling you that all is forgiven. I am no longer angry about anything, I love you and want us to get back together.”
Yet, most women just don’t make it easy for their ex like that.
Here’s the thing…
Even if your ex is still in love with you and is secretly hoping you and her will become a couple again, in most cases, she’ll wait (and hope) that you are man enough to take the lead by making peace with her.
Essentially, she wants to see if you’ve got the emotional courage (i.e. balls) to apologize to her for your past mistakes and make things good between you and her again, even though she isn’t making things easy for you.
If you can do that, she will naturally feel respect for you again.
When that happens she will also feel sexually attracted to you and with those two things in place, it’s only a matter of time before she reconnects with the love in her heart.
So, don’t waste time waiting for a sign from her to make a move and wondering, “Should I make peace with my ex?”
Instead, contact her right away and do it.
Remember to maintain your confidence with her regardless of what she says and does to put you off.
Focus on actively making her have feelings for you again (e.g. by making her laugh and smile, showing her the new and improved version of you).
If you do that, you and her will naturally get back together.
Another reason why you should make peace with your ex is because…
5. It gets rid of the negative feelings she has about you
Regardless of whether you and your ex get back together again, or just decide to move on and date other people, it’s always better to go forward with a clean slate.
Not only will making peace with your ex erase a lot of her negative feelings about you, but it will also allow you and her to be friends as well.
If you are ‘friends’ with her, it means you can communicate with her via text, on the phone and even in person.
…and you know what that means?
You have the perfect opportunity to re-attract her and seduce her back into a relationship with you.
It’s up to you whether you want to be in the friend zone with your ex or not.
You are in control over how much or how little attraction she feels for you.
3 Mistakes Guys Make When Trying to Make Peace With an Ex
As you may have realized by now, making peace with your ex is a good idea.
However, if you approach it in the wrong way, it can cause your ex to close up and feel even more negative emotions towards you.
So, to make sure that you get the job done correctly, be sure to avoid these mistakes:
1. Trying to make peace via text, e-mail or letter
When an ex is being stubborn and won’t answer your calls or agree to meet up with you, it might seem easier to just apologize to her in writing (e.g. via text, e-mail or letter).
However, rather than make her think, “Well, at least he is making an effort to make peace with me. Maybe I should forgive him after all,” it usually annoys an ex woman even further.
Why?
She can’t see your body language or hear the tonality of your voice, so rather than giving you the benefit of the doubt and assuming that you’re being confident and mature, an ex woman will usually think negatively about the approach you are using (i.e. you’re too afraid to call her, you’re being wimpy and pouring your heart out via e-mail because you’re needy and lost without her, you are being way too soppy and romantic towards her even though the feelings aren’t mutual at the moment).
Of course, if your ex is totally in love with you and is hoping for any sign that you want her back, then a letter won’t ruin your chances with her.
Yet, in pretty much every ex back situation where a guy needs help, his woman is no longer attracted to him anymore and doesn’t want to get back together.
In those situations, trying to make peace via a series of texts, a written letter, an e-mail or a long-winded social media message, is not a good idea.
If you want to make peace with her for real, get her on a phone call with you, or better yet, get her to a meet up and talk to her face-to-face.
She will respect you for that.
The next mistake to avoid is…
2. Trying to make peace in a way that she will see as selfish
Sometimes a guy might try to make peace with his ex by telling her all about his feelings, regrets, needs and wants.
For example: He might say things like, “I feel so terrible for what I’ve done. I can’t even sleep or eat thinking about how much I hurt you. I feel so bad all the time. I regret how I handled the end of our relationship and how I treated you near the end. I need you to forgive me so I can stop hating myself. Please just give me a chance to apologize and clear my conscience. It’s really weighing me down.”
Essentially, the only reason he wants to make peace is to feel better about himself.
All she’s going to be hearing is, “Me, me, me!” which is going to make her resent him even more, rather than give him the gift of forgiveness.
So, if you want to make peace with your ex, focus on doing it in a fair and balanced way.
She needs to feel as though it is of benefit to her to forgive you and make peace with you, rather than it only being about you getting what you want.
The next mistake to avoid is…
3. Thinking that making peace with her is the main part of getting an ex back
Making peace with your ex is only one part of the ex back process.
To get her back after that, you need to make her feel sexually and romantically attracted to you as you talk to her, so she then wants to get the relationship back together for her own reasons.
So, by all means make peace with her, but don’t stop there if you want her back.
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