The history of your life is being written in each moment and you are either leaving behind a trail of growing success or you aren’t.
If you feel like you’ve been wandering through life and asking yourself things like, “What should I do with my life?” try asking yourself the following questions instead:
- What do you dream of being able to do with your life, but you’re afraid to try going down that path because you think you will fail?
- If you knew that you only had 5 years left to live, what would you try to achieve during that time to ensured that you are proud of yourself and would leave a positive impact on the world?
- If you had the power to change the world, what would you use that power to do?
The questions above will help you to get clear on what you’ve been hiding from and what you already know that you should be doing with your life.
Childhood Dreams
When you were a child, you were likely asked the question of, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”
You may have been asked this question by a teacher who wanted you to then write an essay about your dream career, or you may have been asked it by a parent or guardian who wanted to help you get clear on your goals and aspirations in life.
Can you remember what you answered? If you can, you will probably be like most people and no longer want to do what you said you wanted to do as a child.
Personally speaking, I said that I wanted to be a fireman and later on, I said that I wanted to be an architect. Now, I’m one of world’s most famous dating coaches and have helped 1,000s of men to get they want with women by teaching them the secrets to success with women.
I don’t have the skills required to be an architect and I wouldn’t want to be fighting fires all day long, so I’m glad that I found the profession that suits me perfectly.
However, even though I absolutely love doing what I do and wake up every day pumped to get back into work here at The Modern Man, I still have additional dreams about doing more things with my life at the same time.
For example: I am now excited about starting a family. When that happens, I want to raise my children to be awesome people and have a really close, loving family that supports each other.
During that time, I know that I’m going to keep working on The Modern Man and helping guys to succeed with women. I literally have ideas for The Modern Man that stretch out 20 years from this date and I cannot wait to get to make them all a reality.
However, despite all that, I still have even more dreams and goals that I want to accomplish in other parts of my life, which then lead to even bigger dreams and goals. The reason why I have that is that I’ve taken the time to imagine the type of man that I truly want to be and imagine the possibilities of what might unfold when I do.
How about you? As a child, what did you often say that you wanted to be when people asked you, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”
Does it match up to how you feel now?
If it doesn’t, don’t worry.
Life has a way of taking you in many different and unexpected directions and in the end, people almost always feel happy that they got to walk that path and learn from it.
The secret is to have an open mind and be willing to walk a new path that will unlock your true potential and connect you with the type of happiness and fulfillment that you are seeking deep down.
If your current desires about life don’t match up to the job or profession that you once thought matched you perfectly, then don’t feel down on yourself. It is completely normal and to be happy, you need to open yourself up to the possibilities that are now right in front of you.
For example: If a guy wanted to be a doctor, but during his university course, he found that he no longer enjoys it and keeps wishing that he could run an organic farm or open up a ski-retreat on his favorite mountain, he needs to be ready to open his mind those alternatives.
If he gives up on his initial idea of being a doctor, it doesn’t mean that he is a failure. There isn’t one correct way that a person should live their life and doing a job that you don’t love just to please others, isn’t going to bring you a lifetime of happiness.
If you want to be happy with what you choose to do with your life, you’ve got to be brave enough to follow your true dreams or embrace the role that life throws at you one day.
The answer to the question of “What should I do with my life?” is a lot deeper and more important than simply choosing a profession to work in.
What really matters is this:
- If you take on the role that you are planning to embrace, will it force you to become a bigger and better man, or will it allow you to hide away from reaching your true potential as a man?
- Are you intending on rising through the levels of the profession or path you intend to take, or are you just hoping to stay out of the way and be that guy in the background who people don’t really notice?
- If you follow the path that you’re intending to take, will you be proud and happy with your achievement in 20 years time, or will you feel like you’ve wasted your life doing something that was too easy for you?
What a lot of guys don’t realize is that their life purpose and how they approach their life will have a direct impact on their personal happiness and the quality of relationship that they have with a woman.
When you are rising through the levels of your chosen path and reaching for your true potential as a man, you get to feel proud, happy and excited at each positive milestone you reach.
It’s a constant journey of rising success and achievement and it fuels your mojo for life and gives you that pep in your step that keeps you going when the path becomes challenging.
All of that adds up to you feeling better about yourself as a man and, just as importantly, your woman being able to look up to you and respect you.
If a modern woman finds herself in a relationship with a man whom she can’t look up to and respect, she will eventually begin to lose touch with her feelings of attraction for him.
When that happens, the sex will usually dry up and she will become less affectionate towards him, which will often lead to him becoming insecure, clingy and needy, which will turn her off even more.
I’ve heard of this happening time and time again when I’ve helped phone coaching clients who are in the process of getting a girlfriend, fiancé or wife back. Unlike women from past generations, today’s women are often unwilling to put up with a man who is unable to be the type of man she wants to be with in a relationship.
The Difficult Dream
When you were a child and you thought about what you wanted to be when you grew up, it’s possible that you chose a career that wasn’t possible to achieve once you became an adult.
For instance: If you are short, then it’s unlikely that you would ever be able to become a professional basketball player.
If you wanted to become an astronaut, the chances of getting chosen are going to be very limited because there are very few opportunities today for manned space travel, so despite being intelligent enough, you might not be able to become a fully fledged astronaut anytime soon.
There are many other examples of difficult dreams, but how you accepted it an adult will be a strong indicator of the type of man you are today.
There’s an old motivational quote that goes like this, “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade,” meaning that even if you end up with something in your life that you don’t desire or didn’t ask for, look at it as an opportunity to turn it into something great in another way.
Using the example of wanting to be a pro basketball player, but lacking the height to be competitive enough, a successful man would think, “Okay, what else can I do in the basketball industry? How else can I use my love for the game to make an impact and become a better man in the process?”
For instance, he might train to be a coach, get involved in sports medicine, go into sporting goods sales, study sports management or otherwise get involved in a profession that would keep him around the game of basketball.
Alternatively, realizing that since his early dream was unrealistic, he might also decide to mentally regroup and go after another profession that he also has a strong interest in.
Not getting involved in basketball doesn’t mean that he is a failure or giving up on his dreams. Instead, he is simply being a wise, open-minded man and realizing that there is much more to life than just basketball.
He could still attend games, be a fan and maybe marry a taller woman in the hope of having tall sons, which he then might encourage to play ball. However, regardless of which path he takes, what is most important is that he is on the path to becoming a bigger and better man himself.
If you’re not on a path at the moment that is pushing you to become a bigger and better man than you are, then how can you expect to feel happy, passionate and proud of who you are?
Imagine the guy who wanted to play basketball (but couldn’t because he was too short), decided instead to moan and complain about how life isn’t fair. At every opportunity, he would tell friends, family or coworkers how bummed he is about not being able to become a basketball player and as a result, he simply doesn’t know what else he should do with his life.
He might say that playing pro basketball is the only thing that he’s interested in, but he’s simply being closed-minded. If he opened his mind to the world around him, he would quickly realize that there are millions of different things that he could be doing with his life that would lead him to become the type of man that he and others are proud of.
If he remains closed-minded to the world around him, he is setting himself up for a life of depression and will disappoint the woman or women who end up being in his life. This type of man may get a good a job, but it usually won’t be a job that brings him pleasure and makes him feel proud and happy.
Instead, he works only for his paycheck. He complains about what his life might have been like if he could play ball, rather than going after what still could be an amazing life for him.
He lingers in a muted, unsatisfied state of existence and looks on at the world around him as being cruel, rather than being a wise man who has the courage to turn lemons into delicious lemonade.
Being a Man of Purpose Helps to Maintain a Woman’s Respect and Attraction For You
Today’s women are often no longer the type to just sit around waiting for a man, any man, to come and marry her so she can be a housewife.
In many cases, a woman will be well educated, strong-minded and successful in her career or business or at least have the capacity to one day be successful when she grows up.
As a result, a modern woman usually doesn’t feel a desperate need for a man to provide her with food, shelter and protection like women of previous generations did. She can go to the supermarket or grocery store and buy things on her own and she can rent a house or get a mortgage on her own when she’s earning enough to do so.
Of course, that doesn’t mean that she doesn’t want a man in her life at all. Women still want men, but they just aren’t as dependent on men as they used to be.
As a result, she doesn’t have to settle for a guy who lacks purpose or who doesn’t follow through on his biggest ambitions and dreams because he is afraid of failure or doesn’t feel as though he deserves success.
In the past, a woman had to put up with a man like that if she made the mistake of marrying him, because it was shameful to divorce. However, in today’s world, a woman doesn’t have to stay with a man who she no longer respects or feels attracted to.
This is why it’s now more important than ever for men to become a man of purpose. In other words, follow through on your biggest dreams, goals and ambitions and be that “man on a mission” who will stop at nothing to achieve whatever it is that you are aiming to achieve.
Women are naturally attracted to and respectful towards men who are focused on what they want out of life and are willing to keep going after it even when they face obstacles and challenges along the way.
Some unattractive women are willing to accept whatever they can get in a guy, but the majority of attractive or at least fairly attractive women know that they can do better and don’t have to settle for a lazy or fearful guy who doesn’t have the courage to make his dreams come true.
As empowered as modern women are, they still want a man that they can respect and feel protected by. She wants to be able to look up to her man and feel proud of him, rather than look down on him and feel embarrassed that her man lacks ambition, not only in his job, but in almost every aspect of his life.
A woman wants a man who seeks the things that are important to him and goes after them with an inner strength and determination and a “never quit” type of attitude. When a woman is with a man like that, it’s very easy for her to maintain her feelings of respect and attraction for him.
She will know that he is a rare find and isn’t like most other men who settle for mediocrity or accept second best because they are afraid to stand up and go after what they really want.
You Don’t Have to Already Be Successful to Be Attractive to Women
Some guys make the mistake of thinking that they have to be super successful in business and be rich and powerful in order to get the girl.
A guy will assume that he has to have a professional career like a doctor, lawyer or entrepreneur in order to attract a great woman. Yet, that’s not true at all.
Here is the real reason why guys get rejected by women…
What matters most to a woman is that you have the potential to do well one day. She wants to see that you are not afraid to follow through on your biggest goals and dreams and if she meets you when you’re just starting out, she will feel proud to stick by you as you overcome the obstacles on your way to success.
So when you ask yourself, “What should I do with my life?” don’t focus on trying to become achieve something that you hope will impress a woman. Most women are more impressed by a guy who simply has a sense of purpose and has the courage and follow through to never give up until he achieves it.
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