Dating is easy when you know how to make a woman feel attracted to you, enjoy her time with you and feel like she’d be lucky to get a chance with you.
If you can do all that, most of the women that you date will happily sleep with you and get into a relationship with you.
On the other hand, if you don’t really know to make women feel attracted to you on a date, you make them feel awkward or like they are probably too good for you, most of the women you date will play hard to get or lose interest after the first date.
Here are some classic dating mistakes that cause a woman to lose attraction for a guy…
Mistake #1 – Being Too Nice
You’ll often hear women talking about how they are looking for a nice guy because most guys are jerks, assholes or only interested in having sex. Hearing that, a lot of guys get confused and assume that if a woman wants a nice guy, then being REALLY nice to her will REALLY impress her.
Yet, that’s not what the woman means when she says “nice.” What a woman means by “nice guy” is a guy who makes her feel sexually attracted to him AND is also a good guy.
Being nice to a woman isn’t the thing that will make her feel turned on or become wet down there. She might like you as a person, but she won’t have an intense desire to have sex with you because you are nice and polite to her.
If you want a woman to feel the desire to have sex with you and begin a relationship, you have to focus on making her feel sexually attracted to you and turned on by the way that you interact with her.
Some women are a lot easier than others though. You will come across women that will hook up with a guy who doesn’t even make her feel much attraction and is simply a nice guy who has been very persistent. Yet, those relationships rarely last.
What women are really looking for a good guy who ALSO knows how to turn them on. When a woman finds a guy like that, she latches on and doesn’t let go.
Mistake #2 – Not Taking on the Leadership Role
There’s nothing wrong with asking a woman for her input on things or letting her choose where to eat or where to go for some of their dates together. Women are just as intelligent as men and are perfectly capable of leading the way if necessary.
However, when a woman is forced into the leadership position too often because a guy doesn’t have the confidence or desire to lead, she begins to lose respect for him. When a woman loses respect for a guy, she then begins to lose attraction for him.
Generally speaking, a woman wants to be with a man who has the confidence and desire to “be the man” in the relationship, rather than expecting her to do that. She wants to relax into her feminine role and feel more girly around him, rather than having to think, behave and feel like “the man” on a regular basis.
Mistake #3 – Trying to Buy Her Affection
Taking a woman out to an expensive dinner, buying her expensive gifts or splurging money on things for a woman isn’t what will create lasting feelings of respect and attraction.
There’s nothing wrong with taking a woman out to dinner or even getting her a gift if you want to, as long as you’re not doing it as a way to make up for the fact that you don’t even know how to make her feel attracted to YOU as a person.
Some guys make the mistake of trying to buy a woman’s love, respect, attraction and affection with gifts. Yet, the woman isn’t in a relationship with the gift.
Money shouldn’t play a major part in your dating life. It doesn’t matter if you have a lot of money and can afford to spend it on her. The best gift you can give to a woman is to deepen her feelings of love, respect and attraction for YOU over time.
Mistake #4 – Constant Compliments
Everyone likes the occasional, sincere compliment, but if you are constantly complimenting her throughout the date, she may feel like there is a huge value discrepancy between you and her or that she is probably doing you a favor by going out with you.
Give her honest compliments, but don’t try to win her over with compliments. What matters the most is whether or not she feels sexually attracted to you. If she feels sexually attracted to you, she will appreciate a compliment from you so much more.
Mistake #5 – Asking Permission to Kiss Her
Imagine this…
You’ve been out on a great date with a beautiful woman. You’ve laughed together, enjoyed each other’s company and had amazing conversations where you really connect. She may have even leaned against you for a lingering moment or “accidentally” stroked you softly with her hand sometime during your date.
Now that the evening is ending, you’re both moving in closer and speaking more quietly and intimately. She’s looking at you in the eyes and displaying girly, submissive body language at times to show that she is sexually attracted to you.
Yet, instead of taking her into your arms and kissing her, you stop and ask for permission to kiss her. You ask, “Can I kiss you?” or “Is it okay to kiss you?”
This kills the mood.
The woman realizes that you lack confidence and need her to reassure you that she wants you to kiss her. A confident guy would know that he is attractive to her and would simply lean in and kiss her.
A woman expects you to be able to read her body language to see if she is ready to be kissed or not. If she is ready for it, she expects you to have the confidence to go ahead and do it and if you don’t, she will begin to lose respect and attraction for you.
This isn’t the 1950s where boys asked girls for permission to give them a goodnight kiss at the doorstep. Today’s women are much more sexual and expect that the man they’re dating is going go in for a first kiss and possibly even lead her to the bedroom…without first asking for her permission.
If a woman doesn’t want you to kiss her, she will say no when you lean in. If that happens, simply say, “Oh, okay…I must have read that wrong…I thought you wanted me to kiss you.”
Then, simply focus on building up the sexual tension between you and kiss her later on when the mood is right, or when she gives you more obvious signals like cuddling into you, touching you when she looks into your eyes, etc.
Mistake #6 – Getting Too Serious Before She’s Earned it
If a woman is attractive, most guys get really keen on her right away and share their “feelings” with her.
If the girl that you’re dating is beautiful, she will bored of guys giving her the same experience every time. She knows that if she is nice to a guy, he will develop “feelings” for her and then want to be her boyfriend, or at least have sex with her.
She won’t have to do anything special other than look good and most guys will want her.
Yet, that’s not fun for her.
After a while, most women develop a desire for a guy who is more of a challenge. She wants to feel like she has to earn is interest, rather than getting 100% interest from him just because she looks good.
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How can someone whos on a budget get this book for less
Hi Chris
Thanks for your question.
The Flow is already on sale. We should be selling it at $197, but it’s available now for only $97. Sorry if the price is too high for you. A lot of guys in your position save up some money to buy it. In the meantime, here’s some free stuff to help you out:
http://www.themodernman.com/download_the_flow_in_action.html
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/articles/quick_fix_report.html
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/audio/turn_rejection_into_success.html
Cheers
Dan
Hi Dan,
How come when I click on the link for the Flow it’s selling for $97 ?
Hey Tom
Thanks for your question.
The Flow has increased in price. We’ve literally had 100s of customers tell us that we were charging too little for it. Guys only realize how valuable The Flow is after they read it and apply the techniques in their life. I do my best to help guys understand the tremendous value in The Flow before they purchase, but it’s pretty much impossible to do so because what you will experience is beyond words and is priceless.
Cheers
Dan
Dan, your article is awesome and have enjoyed reading. thanks you such a great consellor
Hi Jessey
Thanks for your positive feedback.
I’m glad I was able to help you.
Cheers
Dan
Thanks Dan
You’re welcome Mamun.
hey dan
please give me the easiest way to ask a woman you have met the second time her number.
thenks dan
Hi Kenyanajr
You’ll find those type of techniques in The Flow: http://store.themodernman.com/in/58e9e6c
If you don’t know how to do something as simple as getting a phone number from a woman, you will have 100s of other questions, which is why I have a book.
Cheers
Dan
hello dan
i am a 20 years old an academically intelligent person who got lucky 2 times.i want to improve myself with women.that is the only part of my life am not happy and is giving me concern.
Hey Lex
Thanks for your comment.
Start here:
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/audio/turn_rejection_into_success.html
Cheers
Dan
Does the man always need to be the one escalating or is it only the first date?
Hey Johnny
Watch this for the answer: http://www.themodernman.com/videos/turn-your-female-friend-or-co-worker-into-your-girlfriend.html (It’s on a different topic, but the global/overall answer you’re seeking is provided).
Cheers
Dan