It’s a lot easier for a woman to start dating after a divorce because she only has to put up an online dating profile and she will have 100s of guys willing to date her immediately.
The same rules don’t apply for men though.
Why? Most men are willing to have sex with a woman simply based on how she looks, so it’s easy for women to attract men for sex or dating. Men look through online dating sites and are willing to meet up with pretty much any of the women who look good enough for sex or a relationship.
As for women, they look for completely different things in a man when they meet him in PERSON, but if they are looking ONLINE, they select men based on looks and financial status. This happens because the woman has 100s and often 1,000s of men to choose from.
In person, women are more attracted to a man’s personality traits and behaviors (e.g. confidence, charisma, ability to make her laugh, charm, etc), which is why it is much easier to begin dating after divorce if you actually approach and attract women in person.
If you are afraid to approach and attract new women, watch this…
What you need to understand is that MOST guys don’t approach because they are scared of modern women.
That is a HUGE opportunity for you.
When you are the man who has the confidence to approach and the ability to attract women when you do approach, you will LAUGH at how easy it is to pick up women these days.
By the way…
All of the guys below are perfect examples of the fact that women can be attracted to things other than looks in a man.
Women can feel attracted to good looking, handsome men, but if an average looking or below-average looking guy knows how to make a woman feel a lot of attraction to his personality and behavior, she will forget about the fact that he doesn’t look like a male model and fall in love with who he is on the inside.
Are You Ready to Meet New Women?
If you are looking to meet new women after coming out of a divorce, you need to get yourself ready to succeed.
For example:
Do you know how to attract women when you meet them?
Are you using the old nice guy approach to women?
Do you make any of these mistakes when talking to women that result in a woman feeling turned off or losing interest?
The more prepared you get before meeting new women, the easier it will be to attract and pick them up.
Once you know how to properly attract women, you will find that the majority of women that you meet feel a spark with you and see you as a charming, charismatic man.
You can do this.
You can bounce back from the divorce and become an even more attractive man that you’ve ever been so far in life.
You can be the sort of man that women refer to as a real man or a catch.
It’s actually quite easy to do, as long as you are willing to learn how to properly attract women during conversations and interactions.
Life Without a Wife
You have already gone through the pain of a break up with a woman you love, so you know that it isn’t a pleasant experience.
One minute, you feel safe in your marriage and you have the identity of being a husband and the next, you’re on your own again. She turns her back on you and starts moving on with her life without you.
You’re on your own now, so what are you going to do about it?
Are you going to begin having sex with lots of new women or get into a serious relationship with the next great woman you find?
Some men bounce back quickly after a divorce because they are confident and know how to attract women. However, the ones who struggle the most are those who have lost their mojo and forgotten how to actually flirt with women and attract them.
After a few unsuccessful attempts at talking to women, many divorced men feel like giving up.
It seems so difficult and they begin to think that maybe their lack of success with women is due to the fact that they are now a divorcee.
Yet, it’s not.
The reason why so many good men get rejected by women is that they don’t even know how to ATTRACT women during an interaction. They simply hope to be LIKED for being a nice man.
That’s not how it works.
You’ve got to actively make a woman feel sexually attracted to you by displaying personality traits that naturally attract women.
When you know how to attract women with your personality and behavior (e.g. confidence, charisma, conversation style, ability to make her laugh, masculine vibe, etc), you will find it easy to attract women who are single and looking to meet a real man like you.
Why Did You and Your Wife Get a Divorce?
Did you:
- Marry a woman who wasn’t truly compatible with you?
- Gradually ruin the love, respect and attraction she felt for you?
- Divorce because of infidelity or trust issues?
- Take her for granted?
- Divorce because of financial stress?
- Disagree with how to parent your children?
- Argue too much?
There are many core reasons why a couple will end up falling apart in a relationship or marriage, but there is one common reason that I have identified after years of research and successful experience with relationships…
Sometimes a break up can be prevented by ensuring that you deepen her love, respect and attraction for you and get the pillars back in place, while other times (e.g. when you’re not compatible) a divorce is an inevitability.
In today’s world, a man has to choose the right woman for him, rather than accepting whatever he can get or accepting an incompatible woman and then trying to make it work.
In a relationship and then marriage, a man has to know how to deepen a woman’s love, respect and attraction for him over time or else the woman will gradually lose interest and consider leaving him.
Relationship aren’t the same as they were in the past…
120 years ago for example, the divorce rate was less than 10% in the developed world. Women had to stay with a man for life even if they were unhappy. The old saying of, “Till death do us part” was literal.
Not anymore.
Women can now do whatever they want with their relationships. Modern society now accepts divorce and sometimes even encourages women to leave men who aren’t living up to their expectations. It’s a good and bad thing.
A good thing because it has forced us men to become better and a bad thing because it tears families apart that would have otherwise stayed together.
Want to Know the SECRET to Success With Women?
Watch this hidden video where Dan exposes his BIGGEST secret to success with women, which allows you to easily get laid or get a girlfriend.
This video is only available here and you can watch it for free right now.
But what if a man has been having bad relationships his whole life and has been rejected more times than normal? How does one get out of that “well of despair?”
Hi James
Thanks for your question.
I’m sure you’ve heard the serious joke that Albert Einstein once made. He said, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results.” Of course, I’m not saying that you are insane, but Einstein’s wise words hold a simple truth. That being, if you keep doing the same thing and keep failing, you must be wise enough to realize that it is time to try something new. If you refuse to change even though your approach isn’t working, then hey – maybe Einstein is right.
To answer your question James: That is what we (The Modern Man) are here to help you with. When you follow our advice, you will not have another failed relationship where the woman loses interest in you and wants out. Based on the information you have provided, the program you need to watch it Better Than a Bad Boy. You will learn ALL about where you’ve gone wrong with previous girlfriends in the past and how to ensure that next time, your woman’s love, attraction and respect DEEPENS over time rather than fading away.
Additionally, I recommend you read the following articles because you’ll likely identify with many of the mistakes guys make:
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/who-should-wear-the-pants-in-a-relationship.html
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/my-girlfriend-said-she-needs-space.html
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/is-she-still-in-love-with-you.html
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/my-wife-doesnt-want-sex.html
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/how-to-spend-quality-time-with-your-wife-or-girlfriend.html
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/relationship-myths.html
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/why-women-lose-respect-for-men.html
http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/how-to-get-the-spark-back-in-a-relationship.html
Cheers
Dan
You know a lot about women man.You’re a genius.
Hi Jithin
Thanks mate!
Cheers
Dan
Am in long distance relationship with my g.f or even my ex,,but the problem is my g.f’s sista is pushing her to divorce me,but i don kno wat to do nau!!
Hi Chris
Your question makes no sense to me. You’re in a relationship with your girlfriend OR your ex?
Explain yourself better and write properly. It’s “…but I don’t know what to do now!” not “but i don kno wat to do nau!!” You most likely know that, but have been sucked in to the passing, childish trend of writing like that, which women are NOT impressed by. Women may write like that, but if you want to be taken seriously as a man, write like a man, not like boy or girl.
Cheers
Dan
HI there. i am been single for about eight nine months. I have had opportunities to have a couple of girlfriends via dating websites but I have not been interested. I am 42 almost and dont have much in the way of money but I do have an ok job that pays average to below average. Any way my last girlfriend was from sri lanka and I was addicted to her like she was a drug. but she became progressively difficult to get the truth from so I struggled to trust her. She also had been in a relationship with a married man for two years and did not have empathy for the wife. So that made me feel uncomfortable. Even so I really liked many aspect about her despite this. she was like a drug. any way despite this I could not trust her because she did not tell the me small truth about how she was feeling and she progressively became more and more distant. Eventually she dumped me and I then went into deep sadness and depression. I still miss her but I have not been able to find someone whom I feel an attraction for since at that level. My head tells me that she was dishonest and she did not have the courage to tell me the truth on small things which meant that i could not trust her. But part of me really still misses her even though the relationship was five months in length and it was not meant to be. I get annoyed at still craving her back even though she now hates me and has and new boyfriend and does not want me back even as a friend. I have a chinese girl whom states she is interested in me but I am not that attracted emotionally. its more physical. She might be using me for Permanent residency status as well. I wonder if you can point me in the right direction.
Hi Jonathan
Thanks for your question.
Yes, you need to approach women that you’re attracted to and only choose women for a relationship that are suitable for you. Simple, I know, but most guys don’t do it. You are relying on getting lucky. Read: Is Getting Lucky the Answer to Easy Success With Women? and you’ll identify with what I’m saying in the article.
About your ex-girlfriend who HATES you and doesn’t even want you as a friend: What you need to realize is that the amazing feelings you experienced with her are NORMAL. You will feel that most women that you are incredible attracted to (physically, emotionally, intellectually, etc). However, if you go through life trying to get lucky, you will usually get the scraps of what other guys don’t want or run into women who will just use you until something better comes along, like your ex-girlfriend did.
If you don’t have much experience walking up and talking to women you find attractive, getting a phone number or escalating to an instant date right there and then, I recommend that you read The Flow. However, if you are already quite used to it and want to learn my mastery level techniques that make women desperately want you, I recommend that you watch Better Than a Bad Boy.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan
What about women being manipulative and always lining up something else before they get rid of their current boyfriend? The old ‘won’t let go of one branch til they’ve got a grip on the other’. Thats happened to me countless times my past girlfriends break up with me and within a month shes in a new relationship actually even quicker than that my previous girlfriend got into a relationship with another guy within 4 days. Then you ask them about and they lie to your face that they only just met them. Why are women like that?
Thanks
Brody
Hi Brody
Thanks for your question.
Here is your answer: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/how-to-get-lucky-with-women.html If you use the approach that I explain in that article, you can expect to suffer the consequences like you have been.
Cheers
Dan
Ugh! I need help Dan.
I can’t get over my ex gf. I know eventually I will but I will always think to myself I wish it had worked out. Can I still make it work? She broke up with me a month ago due to her losing feelings. I made it worse after the break up because I kept making a fuss out of the break up and telling her I’m sorry when it wasn’t necessary and I would ask the same questions over and over, plus tell her if there is any other guys. I messed up. I realized my mistakes. I just dont know how to approach this situation to get her back. Now she is telling my friend to tell me that she doesn’t want to be my friend. She also already has a boyfriend. Her best friend told me that she doesn’t want to deal with me anymore. She just feels weird by my presence and thinks I’m annoying but that’s strange because I don’t even talk to her. She gave me advice to ignore her completely and shut her out of my world so mmaybe she will comeback but I’m scared she will forget about me. She also said I’m screwing myself over by me talking to her when my ex doesn’t want to but I barely talk to her. I just think that I’m not talking to her properly. I already read most all of your articles so you don’t have to reply with links, just feedback if you may. Thanks Dan!
Hi Tom
Thanks for your question.
The reason she now feels weird in your presence is the same reason why you would feel weird in the presence of a very needy person who didn’t understand that you wanted them to stay away from you. You went too far and she now wants you to back off until you change the things that turn her off about you and become a strong man, mentally and emotionally. Ultimately, what you need to do is re-attract her and I am the best guy to teach you how to do that because I’m an expert on attraction. I recommend you read the following articles to learn more about your situation and what to do:
Is She Still in Love With You?
My Girlfriend Said She Needs Space
Can You Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back?
Cheers
Dan
I have loved this woman for 18 years, and we have been together 3 times. We have four kids together last time we were together were together for 7 years, & she convinced me to get a vasectomy by promising me to stay with me forever (my dream) then she spent two weeks seducing me making me feel more confident then. She avolded me later she told me she didn’t want to be with me anymore it has been Almost a year and a half, and she has givin me mixed messages now she doesn’t want me to be anywhere near her, and she has practically made me look like the bad parent I feel like she is trying to impress her mom, & our workers taking credit for everything, & keeping me from taking care of my kids. Sacriced everything for her and my kids now if she won’t be with me I am destined to be alone how do I regain my life, & confidence to move on with my life or get her back
Hey Thomas
Thanks for sharing your story.
You’ve made the big mistake that I talk about in Better Than a Bad Boy. That being, you’ve placed the woman in the leadership position and are essentially asking her, “Hey, don’t be a feminine woman. Be stable and rational like a man” and meanwhile, you’ve most-likely been behaving in quite a feminine way around her. A woman doesn’t want to be your “rock,” she wants you to be the man and for her, for you to take the lead and to be able to rely on you.
A friend of mine also got a vasectomy after he had two children with his wife. She said she’d stick by him forever and was really sweet early on. However, she then became extremely overweight and treated him like garbage. Why do women do that? You will find out in Better Than a Bad Boy. If you watch that program, you’ll also learn how to turn things around so your woman respects you, feels attraction for you again (yes, right now she would feel little to none) and begins falling in love with you once again.
I also recommend you read these articles to learn more about what to do to fix your problem:
1. Who Should Wear the Pants in a Relationship?
2. Should Men Do Housework?
3. How to Get the Spark Back in a Relationship
4. Is She Still in Love With You?
Cheers
Dan
Dan, I read with interest this article, and there are many many aspects true to my situation. I was married for 27 years to someone I realized was very insecure. He was controlling and verbally abusive. When the kids finally reached their 20’s and were out of the house I finally got the nerve to divorce him. It was tough. I wish I had been tougher on him because he took advantage of me again during the divorce. Right after our divorce, he still wanted sex from me. He was a desperate man. What added to his desperation was that 24 years ago, I gave him herpes. We struck a sick deal. I’d have sex with him in return for use of an apartment we used to own in a big city. I didn’t realize that my use had actually not been terminated at the apartment, but he told me it was and I believed him, and I wanted to go there still, and so I agreed to have sex with him, but it did not last long. When I realized I’d made a big mistake agreeing to this scenario, he went balistic on me and I had to get in my car and drive away almost running over him in the process, but he was getting out of control, and my son was home at the time (college break) and I didn’t want him to over hear the sick convo. To shorten this up a bit (it upsets me to think about how stupid I was), he ended up with a girl from high school who always held him in high regard. He was fond of her, his mother was best friends with her mother, so he sort of grew up with her. She, on the other hand, is a social climber. My ex is rich. About 4 months after I stopped the sex stuff, she moved in, basically. They’ve been living together for about 2 or a little more than that years now, and I wonder – can he actually change his ways? Do you think he’s happy? I KNOW he would die if she ever walked out on him because he really IS insecure even though everyone in the community thinks he’s secure and successful businessman. He is the #1 giver to the community as his family has a philanthropic bent big time. I don’t know how they ever got over the herpes thing… but the thing is, he was so insecure, he didn’t know the first thing in having to tell anyone he had it.. he called me up that night asking me how he should go about dating, and having sex because he said he needed sex and wanted quickies from women but didn’t know what to tell them about the herpes or using a condom. I mean, he was like an adolescent boy.. coming to his ex wife asking her what to do for his “needs”. I told him date awhile and after he noticed interest, to tell her right away. He told me “it won’t get that far” – that’s when I told him he’s on his own then… and then he ended up with this “safe” girl. She sold her house a year and a half after shacking up with him, so now she’s really stuck. I think it’s interesting how this insecure man and this girl who thinks the sun rose and set upon him are now together, and seemingly happy. What’s your prediction for how this will turn out? Thanks.
Hey Rene
Thanks for your comment.
This is a difficult comment for me to respond to though because, before I became the confident, emotionally secure man that I now am, I used to be insecure and hopeless with women like your ex. (Here’s what happened to me: http://www.themodernman.com/why_women_cheat.html). Today, my job is to help men like your ex by guiding them out of insecurity and confusion and into confidence, happiness and clarity.
So, while I feel empathy for the hell you went through emotionally, I feel bad thinking that you might be happy to see him fail. The truth is, if he doesn’t seek help from a guy like me (someone like your ex needs to watch this: http://store.themodernman.com/products/better_than_a_bad_boy.html), he will likely ruin his current relationship with the new woman. As you very well know, there’s only so much a woman can put up with in terms of a man’s emotional weakness. So, unless this woman plans to stay with him, get married and then rob him for half of his money in a divorce, he might be hearing the, “We have to talk” phrase from her sometime soon.
Anyway, I wish you the very best of happiness and love from here on in Rene. The same for your ex husband. Unfortunately, most guys are not brought up around men who can serve as a role model for success in a relationship with a woman. Most fathers give the wrong advice and are ineffective role models regarding love and relationships, so a lot of modern men end up being negatively influenced by the fictional reality they see in TV commercial, TV sitcoms and movies. I’ve lost count of the amount of guys I’ve coached who were basing their understanding of women, what it takes to be a man and how to have a successful relationship, from what they’d seen on TV sitcoms and movies.
All the best to you.
Cheers
Dan