Your woman broke up with you and you’re either feeling devastated, frustrated or just sad about not having her in your life anymore.
You want her back more than anything, but if you don’t know the right way to go about getting your ex back, chances are she’ll be gone for good.
This is why MOST songs on the radio are about people who miss their ex. Most people do NOT know how to get an ex back and when it comes to guys trying to get their ex back, the mistakes are common and global. Here are 5 common mistakes that guys make…
Mistake #1: Why? Why? Why?
When a woman breaks up with a man, most guys are shocked by the news and will repeatedly ask her why she’s leaving him. The fact is that she likely gave the guy clues for a long time and he never picked up on them, so when he starts asking her why she’s doing it, it only annoys her more.
She figures that if he wasn’t paying attention to the hints she was trying to get across to him in the past, why should she bother to tell him now.
She also thinks that if he doesn’t understand what he needs to do, then she doesn’t want to have to be the one teaching him. Women just don’t want to take on that role for a guy when it comes to a relationship.
From all my years of research into relationships, I’ve found that a woman doesn’t simply wake up one morning and suddenly decide to break up with her man. When she does break the news, it’s likely the result of something she’s been thinking about for a long time.
Before she decided to break up with her man, she would have dropped many clues about her unhappiness for months and in some cases years.
If her man doesn’t recognize her hints and act upon them early, when the end comes, she surely isn’t going to spell it out for him. She figures if he didn’t get the message long before the breakup, then she wants no part of discussing her unhappiness with him now.
On the other hand, some women won’t even know exactly why things have stopped working in her relationship. She just knows that she feels a loss of attraction for him and she probably can’t even explain the specific behavior he exhibited (or didn’t exhibit) that was turning her off.
For her, it was just a feeling of discontentment, so asking her why she wants to break up is pointless. She probably won’t be able to verbalize her exact feelings anyway.
Mistake #2: Rushed Apologies
When a breakup takes place, the unfortunate guy will often rush into apologizing and promising to change. The problem is that if he doesn’t understand why the woman dropped him, the apology will be full of words and statements that mean nothing to her.
Also, by taking the blame, especially without understanding her reason and her need to call it quits, the man will only put himself into a weakened position with her, which is extremely unattractive to a woman. A woman can’t stay with a man out of pity for very long.
She wants a man whom she can respect, look up to and be attracted to. She doesn’t want a guy who is willing to say anything, including taking exclusive blame for something he doesn’t even understand he did or didn’t do, just to win her back. If this example rings true for you, it’s very likely you do need to make some changes before you can go about getting your ex back.
It’s not your fault by the way. Most of us don’t grow up around male role models who have a successful, loving and passionate relationship with their woman. Instead, most of us grow up looking at TV and movies and hoping that we can learn that way.
However, what most of us don’t realize is that the writers of TV shows and movies inject LOADS of drama and relationship problems into the show to make us feel entertained.
Writers also play out stories where the “nice guy” gets the girl by being super nice to her, saying lots of sweet things and helping her out in a time of need. Yet, in the real world, women don’t feel attraction for those guys. They make like those guys as a friend, but not as a sexual lover they want to submit too.
Likewise, when we see TV shows and movies depicting long-term relationships, they usually have huge problems, affairs, deception, etc. Rarely does a TV show or movie show a happily loving couple without any problems apart from the occasional disagreement, which they then discuss and become closer over as a result.
Yet, in real life, we often see happy couples who are still madly in love after decades. THAT is possible and it is REAL. You just have to know how to do it.
Mistake #3: Whining, Begging or Crying
When the breakup happens, many guys become very emotional. Some will cry. Some will beg. Some will whine. Some will do all three and more.
The worst thing is that they couldn’t be displaying that behavior at a WORSE time. Women are extremely turned off by emotional weakness in a man. Whenever a guy gets emotional in that manner, it’s a major turnoff for any woman.
That type of emotion is not what women want.
They want a masculine man that they have a strong attraction for and not a guy who shows his emotions in such a weak way, or who breaks down and cries when he is challenged.
Likewise, the opposite emotion is also going to be an instant and permanent turn-off. I’m talking about guys who become hostile, angry or worse…violent. Obviously, that type of behavior isn’t cool, but hey – I’ll be the first to admit, I did it once.
I got so angry at my ex for cheating on me and dumping me that I swore at her and threatened to hurt her (I didn’t hurt her though). I was really angry and felt bitterly betrayed. I called my mother up and cried, telling her, “She cheated on me and now she wants to break up! What do I do?” and even my mother was a bit taken aback by my weakness.
It took me MANY years to learn what it means to be a man and to be the sort of guy who doesn’t lash out in anger, become emotional or have any weak points or insecurities. It also took me many years to learn that real men don’t cry when life gets tough.
Instead, they do what they need to do to fix a situation and achieve the goal they want. These days, I am emotionally bullet-proof and because of that, women feel a deep, lasting and intense attraction for me.
It’s a double bonus type of situation because I feel good and my women (now woman because I’m in a committed relationship) to do. If only I had someone like me to help me out back when I got dumped many years ago, I would have been able to turn the situation around and get her back. On that note…
When getting your ex back, it’s important that you do it like a man and not like a wimp. Any wimpy, whiny, sulky behavior will not win you ANY points with her. Also, if you’re one of the MANY guys who became overly emotional during the break up, don’t worry.
You can turn it around, get her forgiveness and get another chance with her. In my program Get Your Ex Back: Super System, I explain exactly what to say to her so she forgives the crying, whining or begging and gives you another chance. What you will say to her has been tested by 100s of my phone coaching clients who have been able to get their ex back successfully.
Mistake #4: Not Giving Her Space
Even if the decision to break up the relationship was hers, it doesn’t mean that she’s going to just move on right away without needing any time to lick her own wounds and heal. She needs space to sort out her emotions. She likely loved you and thought you and her would be together for life and now she has to work out how she feels about that, while on her own.
If the guy begins bombarding her with phone calls, cards, texts, love letters, e-mail messages or other forms of communication telling her over and over how much he loves her and wants her back, her need for distance, space and time to heal and get her head together is going to become even greater.
If she feels overwhelmed by the unwanted attention from her ex, she likely will want to break off all communication with him.
The good news for guys who have made that mistake is that you CAN recover from it. In my program Get Your Ex Back: Super System, I provide you with TESTED contact examples to use via Facebook, phone and text so she opens back up to you and wants to see you in person.
Mistake #5: Using Trickery
Another common mistake that guys will use in trying to get their ex back is trickery. This can take place in a number of ways.
There’s the “let’s be friends” ploy. What usually happens is that the man will attempt to coax his ex into believing that he’ll be satisfied with “just being friends.” He usually believes that if he can get her to keep talking to him and spending time with him, she’ll eventually realize that he’s a great guy and will want him back.
When he suggests that type of arrangement, she, on the other hand, will recognize what he’s doing and will quickly turn down his proposal of friendship or will continually make up excuses as to why she can’t see him or talk to him.
Guys in that situation will often feel as though they still have a chance and will be behaving in ways that actually push the woman away, rather than draw her back into a relationship. Whatever form of “trickery” a guy employs will usually make getting his ex back less likely.
Did you make any of those mistakes when your ex broke up with you? Whatever you did before, don’t worry about that. You CAN fix the situation, get her forgiveness and get another chance. If you want to do that, I recommend that you watch Get Your Ex Back: Super System.
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Hi Dan,
You Guys are wow! i was reading a newspaper online recently from Africa, in it this matured and educated lady made remarks i need to share with you, according to her “she belongs to the old skool, couple with her orientation, she finds it demeaning for ladies to be chasing men” how can you recitfy that? Becos most of your newsletter, you point out as a modern man, it’s not that cool to chase the lady, instead,it would be better the lady does all that.Kindly help please.Thanks.
Hey Jake
Thanks for your positive feedback and question.
About your question: Women are not the bosses of the dating scene Jake. You don’t take orders from women.
Did you know? Women used to say, “We want men to cry” and then when men starting turning themselves into a S.N.A.G (Sensitive New Age Guy), women dumped them for crying and being so weak. Did you know? Women said, “Men should pluck their eyebrows and wax their chest” and then when men started doing it (and became a “Metrosexual”), women complained that men were spending more time “getting ready” than them and that men were behaving like women.
Jake, EVERYONE has an opinion, but that doesn’t mean they are an expert. The lady who wrote in the newspaper is just giving her opinion. She is most-likely SAYING that she likes men to chase her because she finds it difficult to attract the men she wants and wants men to make it easier for her.
Think about Jake: The guys in your community who are the most adored by women are not the ones who chase women around, hoping to be chosen by the woman. The guys who are confident, believe in their value to women and reject women whom they don’t want are the ones who have their choice with women. That type of man is what the lady in the newspaper wishes she could have. Yet, none of those want to pursue her at all because she’s likely not worth pursuing.
There was a study done in Norway that revealed a higher divorce rate amongst married couples who shared the housework, instead of sticking to traditional roles: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/should-men-do-housework.html These men have been brainwashed into thinking that it’s WRONG to maintain the traditional roles in a relationship and as a result, they have suffered the consequences.
Read this: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/who-should-wear-the-pants-in-a-relationship.html
Jake, if you let women tell you how to behave in terms of dating, you will be rejected, overlooked and pushed around by them. Your choice. You’re either going to be a man who has his choice of women, or you’re going to be a hopeless guy trying to get chosen by a woman.
Cheers
Dan
P.S. Don’t go looking for dating advice from a newspaper. Journalists write about EVERY topic. Just like the random lady being quoted in the article, the journalists are also not attraction and dating experts who’ve done years of testing and research to come to their conclusions. They are just writing an article and reporting on whatever they’re being told.
Dan,
This girl i really liked broke up with me over a year ago now. I really liked her but I made a lot of mistakes. I found the modern man and I have been learning a lot of great techniques. I haven’t since she broke up with me, she went travelling and even though I have had more women here and there I have wondered what would it be like with her now that I have changed for the better. I pretty much made all the mistakes listed above. Would “get your ex back” help me?
Bets regards,
Neil.
Hey Neil
Thanks for your positive feedback and question.
Definitely mate. In fact, it’s actually going to a lot easier for you given the life you’ve been living and the transformations you’ve undergone. You’ll simply need to contact her using my examples and then move to the next steps of the system (can’t reveal those here). Next thing you know, she’ll be in bed with you and you and her will be connecting with each other in a ways that you’ve likely never done before. How? All that is explained in the program.
I’ve helped heaps of guys get their ex back in situations where the woman has said, “I HATE YOU! NEVER CALL ME AGAIN” so your case is one of the easy ones. Always remember: Relationships break up and get back together all the time, all over the world. You just have to know what to say and what to do to make it happen. Women tend to make decisions based on how they feel and I will teach you how to make her feel GOOD to be talking to you again. I will then teach you how to get her to want to start seeing you again.
Cheers
Dan
Dan,
It seems a bit too easy. Right enough she never said she hated me but we just kind of faded away from each other. I remember texting her and we had a brief conversation (light hearted) and then I didn’t hear anything from her for a few months. I then text her again and we spoke, I seen her a short while after while I was with mutual friends but she was distant. I never text her since and she never text me either. What I think led to this was that I was a bit guarded when I spoke to her considering the awkwardness surrounding the break up. Can this programme really fix this and get her back? It would be brilliant if it could.
Best regards,
Neil.
Hi Neil
Thanks for your question.
You see, that’s where you’re going wrong. You have been texting her and trying to get a conversation going. That is not how to do it. You’ve got to make her feel certain emotions (I can’t reveal that here. It’s all taught in the system) and then get her on the phone and get her forgiveness. I explain exactly what you need to say to her. If she’s not picking up the phone, I give you the texts to send to get her to pick up the phone. If she’s un-friended you from Facebook, I give you the exact messages to send her to get her to add you. Then, the exact messages to send to get her on the phone. All of that is included in the program and I’ve also put it into a quick reference guide that is included as a free bonus:
Facebook, Phone and Text Message Examples
You’re actually wasting a lot of time waiting for something to happen. If you want to get her back you have to take action and make it happen. The woman will move on if the guy doesn’t guide her back into feelings of love, respect and attraction for him.
Cheers
Dan
Dan,
I got the programme and it does look pretty awesome. I am currently going through it, I never looked at it that way it’s different. One last question, you said above I was wasting time. Is there a point of no return in getting her back?
Neil.
Hey Neil
Thanks for your positive feedback.
About your question: I meant with regards to her meeting a new guy! 🙂 Make it as easy as possible for you to get her back by going through the steps of the system ASAP. As you know, the strategy of the system will help you get her to get rid of a new guy, but why add that into the dynamic? Push forward to Step 5 of the system ASAP.
Cheers
Dan
hey dan ive watched your videos and they make alot of sense. to make a long story short my ex and i broke up a month ago because of alot of arguements we had supposidly she wanted to give it another shot but she really didnt. i made all the stupid mistakes that guys make to get their ex to reconsider her decision. recently we stopped talking been a week because of an argument we had about her comparing me to her ex and again trying to convince her otherwise. just recently she unfriended me on facebook and stopped following me on instagram. i got the urge to call her but i didnt. i spoke to her sister and she gave me advices on moving on and continueing to act like it didnt bother you. she told me that right now after speaking with her that she was talking shit about me. my guess is for her to comvince herself that she made the right decision. i feel pretty bad that she did all that yet her sister told me that her mom had told her that i supposidly got over her and thats why my ex called her sister because she didnt believe it and sounded alittle shocked. i think my situation is hopeless right now. im still in no contact. by the way when her sister asked my ex if there would be a future she said that she hasnt given any hope to us starting over and that she doesnt think so. i feel pretty terrible right now…..
Hi Angel
Thanks for your comment.
Yet, you haven’t asked me a question. You mentioned that my free videos make a lot of sense, yet you then said that you’re “still in no contact.” Did you watch my video? No Contact is a silly amateur technique MADE UP by people who were TRYING to help people get their ex back. It’s not a technique than an expert like me recommends because I actually do help guys get their ex back and many times, a guy should call his ex IMMEDIATELY. All he has to do is say the right things on the phone and she’ll be interested in meeting up with him.
If you feel your situation is hopeless, then it’s up to you whether you want to change it. However, the secret is not to sit around hoping it changes on its own. You’ve got to make her FEEL the emotions she needs to feel to WANT to get back with you. If you don’t know how to do that, watch Get Your Ex Back: Super System.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan,
This is good stuff. Actually, I should say that all of your stuff is excellent. I actually just broke up with my ex about 3 months ago, but I don’t really want her back due to various reasons which I won’t go into. It’s actually nice to be able to move on without regret (or even bitterness), and start to go out and meet new people. I have always been a relationship kind of guy. Meaning that I don’t really do the casual sex thing as I find the trust, companionship, and love in a relationship intoxicating and welcoming. Anyways, I do have a question. Do you have an article on some really good openers or can you give some examples? Not necessarily situational specific ones, but ones that could really be used anywhere and with any woman? I’d really like to get the basic principles on openers so I can formulate my own. (Like they say give a man a fish he eats for a day, teach him to fish and he eats for a lifetime). One place I see lots of beautiful women is at the gym, but conversation starters are hard to think of in that instance (just an example). Plus, I live in the U.S. where lots of women tend to be very guarded, and no matter how sincere and interested you are they will still keep their walls up instead of opening up. I have wondered though if a man who is very confident is sometimes intimidating to women, who will then automatically turn him down because they feel insecure and that he won’t accept them due to his confidence level. What do you think?
Brian
Hi Brian
Thanks for your positive feedback and question.
About openers (conversation starters) for different environments and for the gym: I recommend that you listen to this: http://store.themodernman.com/in/e8ead2 Ben and Stu (from The Modern Man) worked as personal trainers in gyms for years and are experts at teaching guys how to talk to and pick up women in those environments.
About confidence intimidating women: Only if you go overboard and act like Mr. Perfect. If you have the type of confidence that we teach (relaxed confidence), all women like it.
Cheers
Dan
hey dan thanks for the response
your right maybe i just dont know how to go about it correctly. only reason i havent contacted my ex for a week now is because prior to it i kept being persistant in wanting to reconsile and sometimes it would turn into arguements so all ive done is push her away and pretty much irritate her. like i said only reason i went nc is because to cool the tension but honestly i really dont know how to go about it without making it worse. there is one question that is on my mind and its, even if she unfriended me on fb and instagram and even though she provably wont talk to if i tried to call her now, even with those odds stacked against me, is it possible to change it?
Hi Angel
You’re welcome.
About your question: Of course. 80% of guys looking to get their ex back are in your situation. Your situation is common and I’ve personally helped 100s of guys get their ex girl back under those circumstances. It’s up to you though: Try to work it out yourself or get professional guidance.
Cheers
Dan
hey dan,
im guilty of mistake number 4. she completely cut me off and its been 2 weeks since we have spoken. i guess this is giving her space to this particular girl. alot of people have given me advices on not calling her. ive been out and about with small dates and the occational on night stands from using some of the techniques when i bought the flow a year ago. but in the back of my head i still miss this girl.
Hey Carlos
Great to hear about your success using The Flow.
If you want to get that ex of yours back, stop thinking about it and start doing it. My system gives you a strategy for how to get her attention, then what to say to her to get her to forgive you and want to see you in person. Check it out: Get Your Ex Back: Super System
Cheers
Dan
it has been 2 weeks since my ex and i have talked and out of fhe blue she calls me. i didnt pick up right away but a few minutes later she sent me a long text asking how im doing and that even though we didnt end on a good note she apologized for acting thecway she did. i hit her up an hour later and she picked up on the first ring. i played neutral only mentonted to her that i rwcieved her text when igot out of the gym she asked how ive been my response was very good then she asked me other questions i didnt elaborate so much. i asked her how she was and from fhere she did most of fhe talking. after she finally finished i had a feeling thst is was going to get awkward silence to i ended the call with hey gonna go take a shower well talk later. her response was well no i only called to see how you were doing so i told her ok bye. i found that kinda odd.
Hi Carlos
Thanks for your comment.
You found her comment odd? You were behaving oddly with her. If you learn from us here at The Modern Man, you will realize that you don’t have to play games with women like that. Be real, be honest and don’t play games. If you’re acting like you don’t care, but you secretly do care, all she has to do is say what she said to you and BOOM, she’s back in the position of power.
Cheers
Dan
i was acting non chalant on the phone when we had talked. i carried on a normal conversation with her without showing any feelings. i already had a bad taste in her mouth from persueing her and makin all the dumb mistakes you mentioned in your sight i was acting like the whole unfriending on fb and what not didnt bother me even though it did. hpefully ill be able to invest in your super system and finally put up a success story.
Hey Carlos
Great to hear that you’ve had that realization. Being real and honest makes life easier in all areas. The more straight up you are about things, the more people will respect you, trust you and like you. No need to put on an act. Just be yourself, but ensure that you are being a great person who has the best interests of others at heart.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan ran into this and man feelin pretty bummer mate. Me ex and I officially broke up 2months ago. Been carryin on that self improviment mentality yet out a the blue I found out she’s gonna start datin someone. Never thought it would bother me mate since I been dating lately but now it got me feelin all kinds of weirdness. I want to get her back mate but I be feelin like there’s nothing I could do.
Hey Jeremy
Thanks for your comment.
It’s only natural that you’d feel that way, when you realize that she is moving on. If you want her to turn around and get back with you, my program is here for you. It is a tested system and all you need to do is follow the simple steps, say what I recommend you say to her and she’ll want to start seeing you again.
Cheers
Dan
Hey, Dan! You video on “getting your ex back” describled my present state with my girl. Have lost respect from and the attraction is on the decline as well. She even said to me ” I don’t love u the way I used to and I don’t know why!”. In brief, what do I do to restore the respect and attraction as the man in the relationship?
Hi Khaleel
Thanks for your question.
Here is a free, introductory article about why women lose respect for men: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/why-women-lose-respect-for-men.html
About being the man in a relationship: That is a complex topic and requires you to be aware of what to say and do in many different situations. If you would like to learn my best techniques, I recommend that you watch The Modern Relationship http://store.themodernman.com/the_modern_relationship.html and if then want even more in-depth training on the subject of being what women refer to as a real man, I recommend that you watch Better Than a Bad Boy: http://store.themodernman.com/better_than_a_bad_boy.html
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan
I finally purchased your how to get your ex back super system wish I could have watched it sooner.
I met this girl we went on a date, instant chemistry. We couldn’t keep our hands off each other and everything was great. We kept seeing eachother after that. She introduced me to her friends and cousins and some family members even her little daughter. I leaned from her that she was looking forward to settling and wanted a serious relationship which actually was on the lines of something I kinda wanted as well. After a month we made it official. Soon after that I thought it be a good idea if I introduce her so my circle of friends and gradually my family maybe. She did meet my kids and I got a little close to her daughter as well. Sad thing that her little girl doesn’t have a father figure whatsoever because her real dad never sees her. So that day I had a bad day but I didn’t mention anything about it we went out on a double date. I was teasing her and goofing around with her and my friends. Everybody got drunk and we were just having a good time. After that night I teased her about not giving her the keys to drive but I did at the end when I saw she was serious. She looked really irritated and upset but I didn’t think anything is it until we got to her house. She told me that she felt like I disrespected her and embarrassed her which I didn’t understand why. She proceeded to tell me to get out of her car that she would talk to when I was sober. Seeing as I was in s drunken state I got upset I didn’t yell at her or cursed at her but I did throw a few things in her face that I did for her because I felt at that moment that she was treating me like crap by kicking me out of her car. As I drove home I tried calling her but she didn’t answer and sent me a text I don’t want to talk to you I’m seriously considering never talking to you again. So I left her alone. Didn’t speak to her the next day until the following day in the after noon j texted her if she was still upset. She told me a little but she let me come over so I could talk to her. She told me she felt like I was acting like a little kid and she saw me different. I apologized to her for it and told her I had a bad day and it came out in the wrong way. I had no intentions of mistreating her or anything. After she told me that she doesn’t forgive or forget and its easier for her to just drop the relationship and move on than put up with crap like that. She told me that she almost convinced herself that it was over no matter how she felt about me. I again told her that we’re getting to know eachother and now I know what you like and don’t like. But soon sfter I knew her feelings started to go down. Soon she started complaining that I wanted to see her a lot and be over at her place and I realize the reason I would want to go there is because I didn’t have my place yet and didn’t like being where I was at the moment. She started telling me that she wanted time for herself that it’s her not me. I was ok with it but I had left my keys for work at her place and wanted to get them. She assumed that I did that on purpose which I honestly didn’t and she invited me over. I went to get my keys and she laughed and said j thought you were gonna give me time. I smiled and told her I don’t see any real reason for it but at that time I didn’t have the realization that I have now. We kissed a lot had a movie night with her daughter. After that I left. I saw her a few days later and I told her to come outside for a few because I do road side assistance every other week at my job. She came outside and j just gave her a few really long kisses a slap on the ass and a hug and left. Memorial weekend came around and we were still kinda texting back and forth but her texts were no longer babe or love just regular texts. I didn’t see her that weekend but my feelings were killing me and I wanted to see her on Monday. I called her but she didn’t respond right away. I waited a few hours and sent her a funny text. She finally replied that she was trying to sleep and looks like she has to turn off her phone. I replied I didn’t know but it’s cool enjoy your rest talk to you later. Soon after at night j sent her a text I wanted to pass by and see her. She told me she was going out with a friend who was picking her up she would hit me up later. I called and she picked up. She told me she was getting ready and she would hit me up latef to come over. I told her it’s cool you’ll be sleeping by that time so go enjoy yourself I’ll see you when I see you. I was really pissed off but kept it together. I went out for a few drinks and later that night I texted her I wanted to see her. I found the love letter that she had wrote to me and I realized that my feelings for her were pretty strong. She replied with stop reading my letter I wrote it before but now I know I shouldn’t have I feel like this relationship has gone too quick. I had also posted a comment on her ig and she deleted it. I asked why and she said not everyone knows she has a boyfriend and she doesn’t publicize it. Seeing how I’m private so is she. I told her yea I’m private with my relationships but I don’t mind showing you off once in a while. I told her that I dunno what’s wrong with you and why your acting like that she told me that doesn’t know either and that she just feels right now that I’m more into the relationship than she is she feels like I’m crowding her and she’s the type of female that thinks what ifs and that she didn’t want me to get too close to her daughter because she doesn’t want another man walking out in her not that I would but because of how she’s been feeling lately. She again told me she really just wants space. So I said it’s cool the last thing I want is for me to make you feel crowded. Kiss your daughter for me good night. She replied goodnight. After that we didn’t speak for a few days when I did contact her to see her to talk to her she told me that she wasn’t in the mood to talk about us andl whenever I’d go to her house it was to fuck and her head is not in that right now. I explained that no i just want to talk. She said Ok and I appreciate the gesture but I don’t think you should get me anything because we haven’t been on good terms lately. I left it like that and the next day in the afternoon I hit her to swing by. She told me she was coming down with a cold and to leave it for tomorrow. I was cool with it and told her to call me if she needs anything. She said thank you and j left it alone. The next morning I text her how’s she’s feeling she told me not well she didn’t go to work and she was dropping off her daughter at school. I told her if she needs anything I’m a phone call away. She said thank you I didn’t bother texting her after that. She texts me out of the blue later that afternoon that she couldn’t get me a ticket for her daughters graduation and some of her family members either. She told me that she just told her best friend and her cousin that they couldn’t go. So to kinds test whether she actually cared I told her it was no big deal since I couldn’t go to send me a picture of her getting her diploma. She replied with if I get a chance because they move so fast in the isle. She also told me she would talk to the photographer to get her pictures with her cap and gown. After that I made a few funny texts and didn’t her from her after that. Next day around 3pm I see on her ig that she posted pictures of her and her daughter graduation. I liked both of them and 30 minutes after I called her but she let it ring to voicemail. I sent her a text I wanted to pass by her house to give her daughter her graduation gift. She told me that she wasn’t home and that she would let me know when she’s there. I replied with ok ma. I left it like that. She didn’t hit me back the rest of the day or night. Today I haven’t heard from her either and I haven’t sent her anything whatsoever. That’s when I finally bought your getting your ex girlfriend back super system and just started watching it. I feel so much better and I’ve only seen the first 3 videos. I do have a few questions. What do I do about her daughters gift do I give it to her or not. Also since she hasn’t hit me back I’m using it as ok I get it now I’m giving her what she really wants which is space. I know what I need to do now in order for things to go well with me but there are a few things. I hope that j didn’t push her completely away and I see that she still wears my necklace I got her. And how to handle this space properly without feeding my clingyness. I appreciate the time you take to read my post I know its alot but I wanted to be as descriptive as possible. Thanks again Dan I’ll start applying what I’m now learning.
Hey Carlos
Good to see that you got started by watching the system before contacting me, because there is clearly a lot that you need to learn.
Essentially, it sounds like:
– You are making the classic mistake of being clingy with a woman who wants to be clingy with a guy. She needs you to be more of a challenge for her to keep interested, rather than being 100% interested in her no matter how badly she treats you.
– The necklace you bought her will not mean a thing if she isn’t feeling respect and attraction for you. Only when a woman respects her man, feels attracted to him and feels lucky to be receiving his love, will she then appreciate any material objects he has given her.
– Reading the letter than she wrote you when she was feeling enough respect and attraction isn’t a good idea. A woman’s feelings for a man are not permanent or fixed. If you don’t deepen a woman’s love, respect and attraction for you over time, her feelings will fade away.
It doesn’t matter how many sweet promises she made in the past (e.g. “I want us to grow old together” or “I want us to get married” etc); they don’t mean anything if her feelings fade away or are destroyed by the way you think, behave and act around her. Read: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/why-women-lose-respect-for-men.html
You need to begin putting the Step 3 onwards into action. You need to get to the point where you want her, but you don’t need her and where you can actively attract her based on what you’re saying and doing when interacting with her.
Sending her “funny texts” isn’t good enough either. If she has a bad perception of you, don’t assume that she will be laughing at your funny texts and thinking, “Wow, he’s so funny…I want him!” In most cases, a woman in her position will roll her eyes and think negatively about the guy, even if she replies with a smiley face or “Lol.”
When you are ready, you have to meet up with her in person and re-attract her. You’ve got to come at the relationship in a new way. That being, focus on making her feel attracted to you and want her, but don’t need her. Watch this video for some more background on why that is important with women: http://www.themodernman.com/blog/why-do-women-like-a-guy-who-is-a-challenge.html
Cheers
Dan