Can you get your girlfriend to give you a second chance? Yes, but how quickly she decides to give you that chance will depend on the severity of the mistakes you’ve made, which have led to her breaking up with you.
Essentially, you need to at least begin to change the things about yourself that caused her to lose respect, attraction and love for you. If you want a second chance, but are still the same guy making the same mistakes, then she just won’t be interested.
Most women give their boyfriend a second chance to get back together, but if he is still the same old guy and hasn’t sincerely begun to significantly fix his issues and improve himself, she will usually just break up with him again and close herself off to him.
She’ll then try to get on with her life, but that doesn’t mean it’s completely over. You always have a chance to get your ex back – that’s a fact of love and relationships. Why?
Love does not die. When a woman falls out of love with a guy, the love just goes into the background, but it is still there.
To get her to reconnect the love again, you’ve got to start by getting her respect back and then making her feel attracted to you.
Watch this video to understand how it works…
When you do get a second chance with your girlfriend, make sure that you are mentally and emotionally ready to grab it with both hands and make the best of the opportunity you have been given.
Essentially, you’ve got to get yourself to a place (mentally and emotionally) where you are much more attractive to her and you’re now the type of guy that she can look up to and respect. When you make her feel that, she will naturally begin to reconnect with the love that was pushed into the background.
How Badly Did You Stuff Up?
To begin with, if you have been wondering to yourself, “How to get my girlfriend to give me a second chance” you should first take a moment to consider the severity of the mistakes you made during the relationship that led to her breaking up with you.
This is a time of introspection and honest self-analysis that will help you understand what you really need to change, fix or improve about yourself to be worthy of regaining her full respect.
If you have already realized where you’ve gone wrong, have you now truly fixed those things about yourself? Are you asking your girlfriend to give you a second chance, even though you haven’t yet changed or improved?
Are you willing to fix any issues you have (e.g. insecurity) and improve yourself (e.g. improve your ability to make her feel attracted to you when she interacts with you, improve your understanding of how to deepen a woman’s feelings of love, respect and attraction for you), or do you want to get her to give you another chance without you having to improve anything?
When confronted with the reality of what it takes to get their girlfriend back, guys tend to react in a number of different ways. Can you relate to any of these or has your reaction to the situation been different?
Guy #1: Tries to make her feel guilty for breaking up with him
Guy #1 thinks that he can buy, beg or even “guilt trip” his girlfriend back into his life. He will shower her with gifts, text her repeatedly, tell her how awful his life is without her, threaten to hurt himself and behave in all manner of unappealing, unmanly ways.
He will of course not make any effort to truly change or improve himself or correct any of the mistakes that he made when they were together. As expected; his ex girlfriend takes one look at him and decides that she’s very happy with her new title of “ex girlfriend.”
He continues to send her texts and love letters in the hope that something gets through to her. He talks about how much life sucks without her, how much he misses her and how much he loves her.
He hopes that if he can just tell her how deeply he loves her and how much she means to him, she will give him another chance.
Yet, what he doesn’t realize is that without first regaining her respect, she’s not going to allow herself to feel any attraction for him and as a result, she will remain disconnected from any feelings of love that she once had for him.
Guy #2: Gets her back, but doesn’t really change anything about himself
Guy #2 realizes that he doesn’t want to change who he just to get another chance with her. He can’t really be bothered to address any of the problems that led to their break up and he’s happy being the same guy he’s always been.
He tries to call her and possibly even gets her to agree to a meeting. Yet, as soon as she realizes that he’s still the same guy she left, she leaves him again.
Guy #3: Improves himself to hopefully get her back, but suddenly becomes more attractive to other women and decides to move on
Guy #3 realizes that he has to make some drastic changes about himself to prove to his girlfriend how serious he really is about the two of them getting back together.
He stops being insecure (for example), becomes more confident and charismatic and suddenly notices that many other women are interested in him. Rather than getting back with his girlfriend, he hooks up with some new women, finds himself a new girlfriend and begins to forget about his ex.
Guy #4: Asks random people for advice and ends up feeling lost and confused because of the many different opinions on what to do
Guy #4 will be thinking to himself, “how to get my girlfriend to give me a second chance” and will assume that random people in his life (who haven’t ever helped a guy get an ex-girlfriend back) are going to have the right answer.
Feeling desperate to quickly make a move to get her back before she moves on, he will basically ask anyone who will listen to him, including his friends, bartenders, the waitress at the diner and ask for their advice on ways to get his girlfriend back and give the relationship another go.
Unfortunately, he gets a bunch of inaccurate, guesswork advice (e.g. “Tell her how much she means to you. If she’s the girl for you, she will come back” or “Don’t call her and if she gets in touch with you, then she’s the girl for you”) and proceeds to follow it; with disastrous results.
Why does this happen so often? Simple. Most people simply do not know how to get an ex girlfriend back and while they can provide you with an “opinion” on the topic, they will not have tested out their advice while helping 100s of guys to get a woman back
I’ve spent a lot of time and energy working out the correct way to get a woman back by coaching guys over the phone (via my phone coaching service), listening to all of their problems and working out solutions.
That is why my Get Your Ex Back: Super System isn’t cheap like the millions of ex back ebooks that you will find online.
My systematic approach to getting a girlfriend back has been heavily tested and is proven to work, even in extreme cases where the woman was completely over her ex-boyfriend when she broke up with him.
Rather than messing up your opportunity to get another chance with your girlfriend, consider learning from me. If you do, I will guide you through the simple, step-by-step process of getting her back.
Guy #5: Decides to avoid contacting her and hope that she comes running back to him
Guy #5 decides to follow the “No Contact” rule, which was made up by amateur “dating experts” who are just dishing out the most obvious bits of advice you can find online.
Watch the video below to understand why the No Contact Rule is usually a bad idea. Sure, the No Contact Rule might get her to CALL you to check and see if you’re still missing her, but it almost always does not get the relationship back together.
Unless you make your girlfriend feel the type of respect and attraction that she wants to feel when she calls you, she usually isn’t going to be interested in giving you a second chance.
You might get lucky and get a second chance because she is inexperienced at relationships, but she’ll simply dump you again if you haven’t changed and can’t make her feel what she wants to feel.
Guy #6: Improves himself to hopefully get her back, meets up with her and she is impressed and gives him another chance
Guy #6 realizes that the mistakes he made during the relationship were pretty bad and he will need to make some serious changes to really show his girlfriend that he respects her and is capable of being the man she was always hoping he would be.
He then gets to work on quickly changing the things about himself that caused her to lose respect, attraction and love for him during the relationship. He makes many positive changes within himself and his life starts to change for the better. Suddenly, his future looks brighter and full of promise.
He then gets together with his ex girlfriend for a simple “How are things going with you?” chat or catch up and she is totally impressed with what she sees.
He really has changed and she likes the changes in him. SHE wants to get back with him. Success! He is the guy who has managed to succeed where all the others failed.
Getting a Second Chance With a Girlfriend in Real Life vs. the Movies
Not knowing where else to turn for advice or ideas on what to say to their girlfriend to get a second chance, some guys watch Hollywood movies, TV drama shows and even listen to the lyrics of songs hoping to get some useable advice.
You know the type of movies, music videos and TV drama shows that I’m referring to, right?
For example: The guy standing on his ex girlfriend’s front lawn at night and playing her favorite song on a guitar or a portable music box, while asking her to come back to him. In the movie, she will see it as romantic, smile and then say yes.
Another one is where the guy throws a pebble up at the girl’s bedroom window and she initially seems annoyed, but he then sweet talks her into coming out to talk to him. He then does something really romantic and she says that she will give him another chance.
It happens in the movies, so it HAS to work in real life too, right?
No.
It’s simply a movie, music video or TV show designed to entertain an audience by showing life playing out in a weird, unusual way.
In real life, your girlfriend needs to interact with you and see that you really have changed, that you’ve matured and are now a much more well-rounded man than ever before. When she interacts with you, the level of respect and attraction that you make her feel will tell her whether or not she should agree to give the relationship a second chance.
For her to be sure about saying yes to you, she will usually need to see that you have ALREADY changed the things about you that caused her to lose respect, attraction and love for you in the first place.
Don’t tell her that you WILL change and hope she will give you a second chance. You actually have to change first, otherwise most women will simply say no and if she does agree with it, she will just break up with you again anyway when she realizes that nothing has really change.
If you want a second chance with your girlfriend, but are still the same guy, making the same old mistakes, most women just won’t be interested.
Unlike a movie, in real life you don’t have to be Mr. Perfect and say a whole bunch of perfect, smooth lines to a woman to make her feel respect and attraction for you. It’s actually a lot more simple and easy than that and if you don’t know how to get her to feel respect and attraction for you again, then I’m here to help you and guide you through the process.
If you’ve been wondering what the answer to “how to get my girlfriend to give me a second chance” is going to be for your unique situation, then let me help you.
My proven to work techniques will make her eager to see you again and to give the relationship a second, third or even 10th chance. Yes, I’ve even helped guys get their ex back in cases where the girl is saying, “Go away! I hate you! Never call me again!”
If you want to find out how to finally turn your situation around and get a second chance with her, go ahead and watch my program Get Your Ex Back: Super System
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Dan,
I feel like I blew a chance with a great woman. We went out once, but that was due to work commitments for both of us, we had been texting for over 3 months and seeing each other at work. I acted like a needy desperate child. Long story short, she ended whatever it was that was between us. I tried to get her back at least three times, each time we had been friends and I jeopordised it over and over. I made myself look untrustworthy in the process of trying to get her back. This all happened a year and a half ago, we have lost contact and haven’t spoke for around a year, I was still behaving like a child up to this. We now work in different sectors, but we have mutual friends so it is inevitable that we will meet again. Dan I want to be happy but I’m not sure how to get there and if possible at all I would like a second chance with this woman as a man and not in the childish way I acted before. I am in my early 20’s and I am at a loss as to what to do. any thoughts?
Gary.
Hey Gary
Thanks for your question.
Since you acted like a needy little boy, she is going to still feel deeply turned off by that. Additionally, since you never even kissed, there is likely NO sexual attraction or tension between you, except for on your side. Before you can get this woman back, you’re going to need to show her that other women like you too and you’re not just sitting around waiting for mommy (her) to save you from the big, bad world.
I recommend that you watch Dating Power and learn how to be the type of guy who has women trying to pick you up. It’s a completely different life to live and much better than the sad one you’re living now where you’re sitting around waiting for a woman who doesn’t even feel anything for you. I say this in a loving and caring way Gary, but basically – you need to grow up and become more of a man. read: How to Be a Man
Cheers
Dan
Dan,
Thanks for the response, I think I needed that. The problem at the moment is that my work is even starting to suffer, she’s away in a different country; the problem is bigger than her as you know – I’m crap with women in general. Dan even when i see a picture of her, I feel terrible man- almost physically unwell. To exacerbate the problem further, I’m up against it at the minute, I have huge exams for my work and I can’t concentrate. If i fail them my career is through more or less. I don’t how I let it get this bad but it has. Dan just to get myself focused for these exams, what can I do initially?
Not that it matters a terrible lot I don’t think, but I did kiss her once, it wasn’t as you describe it in some of your articles though, it wasn’t smooth – I asked her permission.
Gary.
P.S. Dan this is a work email, please don’t sign it up for correspondence.
Hey Gary
You’re welcome mate.
Yes, it sounds like you’re going through a tough spot at the moment. As for how to get her out of your mind so you can focus on your exams: You need to realize that you haven’t died by not having her in your life and that life will go on in the meantime. It’s fought, but you just need to get your exams done. Then, when you have a chance, go through my program and begin the exciting process of getting her back. Why exciting? You’ll see why when you go through the program and begin doing the exercises.
About signing you up for correspondence: You will only get notified of replies to this comment if you select it below when replying. Adding a comment doesn’t sign you up for my newsletter.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan,
A month after my girlfriend broke up with up me we started hanging out again only for her to end that after two weeks. I had made some big changes, but it wasn’t quite enough. Her attraction towards me wasn’t at a high enough level. Then, a week later she gave me another shot (tested me) and I completely blew it and cried in front of her. I got your Ex Back program and did all the exercises. We haven’t spoken in over 2 weeks. At this point, should I doing anything differently from your program or start by planting the seeds?
Thanks,
Adam
Hey Adam
Thanks for your question.
Now that you’ve cried in front of her after she accepted you back, you will have to really put a lot of effort into Step 2 and 3 of the system. The more you do of those two steps, the faster you will get yet another chance with her. It sounds like you attempted to get back with her even though you weren’t ready for it! 🙂 If you were, you would not have cried!
Really put a lot of effort into Steps 2 and 3 and then reach out to contact her to meet up with you. Then, escalate to sex and use the techniques from Ultimate Make Up Sex to get the sexual spark back between you and her.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan,
My girlfriend just broke up with me because she found out that i was unfaithfull. I didnt have sex with another girl, but i was chatting up girls online she found out and she said its over.
But she still wants to catch up with me,and go on dates sleep on the same bed but every time i ask her will she give me a second chance she said she doesn’t know yet. I know time is a big factor i asked her if she needed space, so i can use that to work on myself she said no she just want to hang around with me i don’t know what to do i want to loose her and am ready to make changes but i don’t what she wants.
Hey Junior
Thanks for your comment.
Asking her for a second chance is NOT the thing to say to her. Watch this: http://www.themodernman.com/relationship/things-to-say-to-get-your-ex-back.html
Cheers
Dan
Hey there, I’m not sure how old this article currently is. But I may as well ask for some advise. Me and this girl had a thing going for a good 8 months before we actually met, we were pretty madly in love with another during this time. Would talk hours a day, call each other via skype, stay up to 3AM talking and what not. She was completely under my spell, she thought I was perfect and wanted no-one else even in our long distance thing.
We never actual made an official relationship, because we felt that’d put a strain on us. So it was open so to speak, but she didn’t want other guys. But we decided not to have a relationship before we’re close together. Anyway I met her, and I was quite nervous and that probably didn’t look to good. But we had a good time.
Unfortunately a month later she told me she didn’t feel that spark that we had, and just wanted to be friends. I got fairly upset and a bit clingy, kinda trying to convince her she did feel something. Thats the short story theres alot more, but basically I see her again next month. I want to win her over again, and be the guy she thought I was. I feel next time I see her I won’t be as nervous. My question is what is the best way to re-instigate that spark for me again so I can show her the guy she loved.
Hey Jack
Thanks for your question.
There’s a lot of advice in my Get Your Ex Back: Super System http://store.themodernman.com/get_your_ex_back_super_system.html about getting the spark back. It’s not something that can be explained in a few words because it’s actually quite a big topic. However, here is some free advice that you can use for the meet up: http://www.themodernman.com/relationship/things-to-say-to-get-your-ex-back.html
You might also want to watch this too: http://www.themodernman.com/relationship/how-to-stop-being-clingy.html
Cheers
Dan