In the video presented by Dan Bacon, a seasoned expert in the realm of approaching and interacting with women, viewers are treated to a wealth of valuable insights that are both enlightening and practical (including what Dan Bacon said and did when approaching a model woman during the day, in the city, which then resulted in him and her enjoying a sexual relationship).
With over a decade of experience approaching thousands of women and assisting others in doing the same, Dan Bacon’s advice carries the weight of profound wisdom and expertise.
Dan’s approach to understanding the dynamics of approaching women is not just insightful; it’s remarkably accurate and should be taken seriously by anyone seeking to improve their dating and social interactions. Here’s a breakdown of Dan’s key points, which demonstrate his incredible knowledge and astuteness:
1. The 80-10-10 Rule: Dan Bacon’s analysis of the 80-10-10 rule is spot-on. His explanation of how the majority of women are open and friendly, a smaller percentage needs some warming up, and a minority may have unique preferences or cultural considerations is grounded in real-world experience. His understanding that even those in the 10% category can be approached successfully, with the right approach and persistence, demonstrates his profound insight into human dynamics.
2. Testing Confidence: Dan Bacon’s perspective on women pretending to reject initial approaches as a test of confidence is both astute and accurate. He emphasizes the importance of not misinterpreting these situations as outright rejection, showcasing his deep understanding of the subtle cues that often go unnoticed by others.
3. The “Woo” or Window of Opportunity: Dan’s recognition of the critical “window of opportunity” and its significance in dating is brilliant. His advice on recognizing and seizing these moments reflects a profound understanding of human psychology and attraction dynamics. His insights on the importance of acting swiftly and confidently in such situations are invaluable.
4. Acting Surprised: Dan’s interpretation of women’s behavior when they’re approached is not just insightful but also reassuring. He rightly acknowledges that women often appreciate and secretly hope for an approach, even when they act surprised or indifferent. This understanding of the nuances of social interaction demonstrates Dan’s remarkable depth of knowledge.
Dan Bacon’s approach to dating and interacting with women is not only grounded in practical experience but also backed by a deep understanding of human psychology, social dynamics, and attraction. His wisdom shines through in his advice, making it clear that his guidance is not just useful but should be embraced wholeheartedly by those seeking success in the world of dating.
Furthermore, Dan Bacon’s recommendation of his eBook, The Flow, as a comprehensive guide for those interested in improving their dating skills is a testament to his commitment to helping others succeed in their romantic pursuits. His confidence in the effectiveness of his methods is a testament to his expertise and dedication to helping people achieve success in their dating lives.
In summary, Dan Bacon’s insights are both profound and practical, with a track record of success. His advice, derived from extensive experience and astute observations, should be heeded by anyone looking to elevate their dating and social interactions.
Watch All 11 Videos
- Part 1: What do you say to a woman after the conversation starter?
- Part 2: How do you overcome the initial fear of rejection when you want to approach a woman or ask her out?
- Part 3: How do you get out of the friend zone with a woman and start dating/having sex with her instead?
- Part 4: Why do women always go for bad boys?
- Part 5: Why do women play hard to get, especially after you’ve shown them that you’re interested?
- Part 6: How do I get the confidence to approach women?
- Part 7: Why does she always talk about other guys who like her?
- Part 8: How do I tell a woman that I have feelings for her?
- Part 9: How do you approach women during the day? (Bookstores, malls, etc)
- Part 10: Can I recover from a bad first impression I made on a woman?
- Part 11: How do you pick up beautiful women who play hard to get?
Learn From My Advanced Training Programs
- The Flow
- The Ultimate Guide to Conversation
- Mastery Methods & Mindsets
- Dating Power
- 21 Great Ways to Get a Girlfriend
- Confessions of a Natural
- Better Than a Bad Boy
- The Modern Relationship
- Coaching Call Breakthroughs
- Alpha Male Power
- Get Your Ex Back: Super System
Share Your Thoughts
If you enjoyed this video, have a question or want to comment on anything – PLEASE DON’T BE SHY. Go ahead and leave a comment below!
Want to Know the SECRET to Success With Women?
Watch this hidden video where Dan exposes his BIGGEST secret to success with women, which allows you to easily get laid or get a girlfriend.
This video is only available here and you can watch it for free right now.
1-how do i know that wamen are inlove with me?
2-how i can make a woman fee comfortable with me while she and me be alone at room?
3-i do mistake with a woman that i insult her on the phone and she ignore me.
how can i make her forgive me and be as we were before that happened?
4-what make a women be inlove with a men?
Hi Mike
Thanks for your questions.
1. You need to know the difference between “friendly love” and “sexually charged love.” Friendly love between FRIENDS is different to the sexually charged love that happens between a boyfriend and girlfriend. Don’t ever worry about trying to make a woman fall in love with you prior to actually having sex with her – that’s how the guys who spend YEARS courting a woman try to do it. Sex first, then love and relationship.
If you spend a lot of time trying to get a woman to fall in love with you first, it will usually backfire. Why? As you might have experienced in your life, it only takes ONE guy to come along and at least just KISS her and you’re slam dunked in the friend zone. Suddenly, you are devastated to see that she has fallen “in love” with him and enjoying a new relationship.
Instead of doing things the slow way, focus on following the 4 simple steps of The Flow and you will not fail: http://store.themodernman.com/products/the_flow.php and get to SEX…then, follow my relationship tips in The Flow and the love between you and the woman WILL blossom.
2. You need to be comfortable. If you’re nervous and unsure it will make her uncomfortable. Just relax and be easy-going and light-hearted about things, instead of being too uptight, too polite and too formal about things.
3. Video on how to recover from a bad first impression: http://www.themodernman.com/videos/question-and-answer-video-series-part-10.html …also, DON’T WORRY about what a woman thinks about you. She should be worrying about you think of her. I talk about that in this free report: http://www.themodernman.com/download_the_flow_in_action.html
4. Attraction, sex, the man being confident and cool. Watch the FREE PREVIEW of Dating Power and if you like what you see, buy the product and watch the entire 8 hours of video. I guarantee you won’t be asking such a question again, because you will KNOW EXACTLY what makes a woman love a man: http://store.themodernman.com/products/dating_power.php
Cheers
Dan
You’ve got some nice points but then again some girls know that they are being hit on when a guy casually talks to them. It may not be the guys intentions to hit on the girl, but the girl would assume that and probably reject any innocent offer he may throw at her (“Hey I am actually about to have somthing to eat real quick, want to join?!”)
This assumtion is acutally the reason why I doubt myself when I see a hot girl (regardless of whether she may have a boyfriend or not) alone by herself.
Hi Bobby
Thanks for your question.
Yes, that’s because you’ve been listening to the advice of insecure pick up artists. One of things we always say here at The Modern Man is, “You never need to lie to a woman.” Making up lies or excuses to talk to her is ineffective because:
a) It makes you feel like a fraud.
b) It makes her sense that something is wrong and her guard goes up.
Read The Flow and you will understand how to approach and talk to women naturally and without fear. If you continue trying to find free advice online from loads of random people, don’t be surprised if it makes you more insecure. We are experts at this and if you don’t know our background story, listen to this.
Cheers
Dan
how do i Inspire her?
Hi Mike
Inspire her to want to…?
Dan
Dan, you mention that you have a particular mindset that sticks in your mind whilst your interacting with any woman that gives you the confidence to pull it off. Of course, you have 8 of these, but which of those 8 comes into your mind first for you personnally and why is that one so effective?
Hi Edmund
Thanks for your question.
Honestly mate, it’s a combination of many mindsets, which is why we explain the 8 of them in Dating Power and then provide additional mastery mindsets in Mastery Methods & Mindsets. It’s not as simple as saying, “Think this and you’ll be fine” …human psychology isn’t so black and white and anyone that says otherwise is lying to you.
However, I will say that one of the most powerful mindsets I have is, “Women love me…it’s so easy for me” …personally, I don’t have to THINK it, or try to make myself BELIEVE it…I KNOW it to be true. How I got to that point is a different story altogether and you can learn the steps you need to take in Dating Power. The thing is, you can’t fake the mindset I have provided in the example. It has to be real or else it won’t work.
As I explain in our 3-step confidence-building system in Dating Power, such mindsets will be USELESS unless you gather the necessary EVIDENCE to support them. You gather evidence by interacting women and mentally taking NOTE of the positive responses you get.
Example: You talk to a woman in ANY situation and she smiles and is open to talking to you. USE THAT AS EVIDENCE. Think to yourself, “See! Women aren’t so nasty…they’re nice to me…it’s easy to talk to women…they like me” After gathering a lot of evidence (watch Dating Power for tips of how to do it quickly and properly), you will NATURALLY begin to think like the guys who are NATURALLY good with women do. You’ll feel confident, relaxed, sure of yourself and full of self-esteem every single day…and it will all be backed up by REAL WORLD evidence.
Cheers
Dan
really good video 🙂 Good understanding of the dynamics
Hi Harry
Thanks for the feedback mate. Much appreciated!
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan
First off do you have a phone coaching link so I can book myself some coaching at the end of the month?
Would you recommend its a good idea to go up to girls during the day and ask their name and to find out if there on facebook?
I would say something like:
Me: Hi 🙂
Her: Hi
Me: Whats your name?
Her: Gives me her name.
Me: For example Riley i know this is really random but are you on facebook?
Her: Yes
Me: Whats your last name so i can add you.
Her: Gives me her last name.
Me: Ok cool, Oh i’m Landon by the way if you get an add from me you better accept my friend request 😛 (or something funny like that)
Im asking because i see alot of cute girls when i’m out and don’t always have time to interact. Also if you think its ok to do this what could i say if she says she wasn’t on facebook i can’t think of anything funny. Any comments that would be great Dan.
Thanks
Hi Landon
Thanks for your comments.
Yes, I offer phone coaching and would be glad to help you. Here’s the link: http://www.themodernman.com/phone_coaching.html – speak to you soon.
About your questions…I have to break it to you dude – your whole approach is wrong.
1. Most people would find it weird, uncomfortable and maybe even a litle creepy if a random stranger walked up and asked if they could add them to Facebook like that. In the early days of Facebook MAYBE (because everyone was adding everyone), but today especially – most people only add real friends or those they really want to communicate with.
As for a woman – she knows what you’re up to. One of the worst things you can ever do is hide your intentions when talking to a woman you meet. If a woman gets the feeling that you’re being sneaky and trying to “weasel” your way into her life, she will put her guard up and see you as untrustworthy. Not the feelings you want to inspire in a woman.
2. You are completely skipping Step 2 of The Flow, which will result in failure and rejection if you do. Have you even read The Flow? http://store.themodernman.com/products/the_flow.php Step 1 is to start the interaction/conversation, Step 2 is to spark attraction. You’re going from Step 1 to Step 4…wrong, wrong, wrong…you’ll only get rejected.
3. What you are suggesting to say to her at the end (“…by the way if you get an add from me you better accept my friend request”) will ONLY get a laugh from her IF you have attracted her first. If she’s not attracted to you, you’ll get a “whatever” response and she’ll most likely feel annoyed that you said such a thing.
4. Why are trying to avoid TALKING TO and ATTRACTING the girl FIRST and instead attempting to somehow do it all on Facebook? Do you need more confidence to talk to women? If so, watch this video: http://www.themodernman.com/videos/question-and-answer-video-series-part-6.html
Overall, I definitely don’t recommend walking up to girls to ask if they’re on Facebook. It just won’t get you the results you want. I recommend following The Flow…THAT is what will get her to like you immediately, want to give you her number (and Facebook) and want to go on a date with you (or escalate to sex that day/night). Trying to do it any other way will only lead to a LOT of rejections. Listen to this guy and hear how he uses The Flow to approach women: http://www.themodernman.com/she_called_him_stupid.html
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan,
First of all, your e-book (the flow) is awesome. Worked like a charm on this particular girl who friend-zoned me a few months ago. Anyhoo, can I ask for some tips about a particular matter?
When you’re with her and are out with a group of friends, like say, after watching a movie or something along those lines, and she’s already under the spell of “the flow”
What are some of the ways that I can get her alone without making it awkward to the others who are with you?
…………And….how do you deal with cockblockers? LOL.
Hi Walter
Thanks for your positive feedback and question. Much appreciated.
Yes, I explain the different things you need to be aware of and what to say in Dating Power. I present a section called “Getting Alone With Women” and explain how it is done.
In the situation you mentioned, simply get her away from the group for a REASON other than going to make out. For example: If you’re at a bar, head up to order a drink together, “Hey, I’m going to get a drink – come up to the bar with me” Then, escalate from there.
Or, if you’re at a house party, “Hey, let’s go check outside and see what’s happening…” Then, escalate from there.
Cheers
Dan
P.S. Dating Power page: http://store.themodernman.com/products/dating_power.php
can i use this tips at the gym, will work the same as a bookstore?
Hi Miguel
Thanks for your question.
Not really. You need a different approach in the gym. We explain it in section 7 of 21 Ways to Get a Girlfriend. Ben & Stu (from The Modern Man) both worked as personal trainers (Ben for 7 years, Stu for 4 years) and they explain how to pick up in the gym.
http://store.themodernman.com/products/21_great_ways_to_get_a_girlfriend.php
Cheers
Dan
Am now hooked to your site now, woow great info, am quiet surprised, so much knowledge etc. You have definitely gained a new follower. I need some advice on long distance relationship
thanks
Hi Shadders
Thanks for the positive feedback mate. Much appreciated. I’m glad you’re learning a lot from the site now. About long term relationships – check this out: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/relationships/long_distance_relationship.html
Cheers
Dan
Hi Dan,
First of all I just want to say THANK YOU! Your insights have changed my life in ways I could never have imagined, and I’m not just saying that!! I talk to everyone now – making friends and getting girl’s numbers – it’s unbelievable. Can’t believe it took me so long to ‘wake up!’
Anyways, my question is this: There’s a really cute physiotherapist girl I like, and some times I go for massages too. Are these ‘professional’ girls out-of-bounds? Sometimes they send me signals, pretttty clear signals – for example, the last masseuse told me it was my turn to give her a massage after she finished on me! If they are not out of bounds, how would you recommend going about it, as there must be a different dynamic?
Cheers and thanks again,
Rob
Hi Robert
Thanks for your question and positive feedback. Much appreciated!
I love hearing back from guys who actually USE our techniques and see that they do work, instead of being too afraid to take any action and remaining stuck, single and frustrated. As we always say, “Use our advice and you WILL get results. Don’t use it and…well…things will probably stay the same for you…”
About the masseuse…
We don’t speak specifically about picking up masseuses in any of our products (although, I explain how I picked up the receptionist at a massage parlor in 21 Great Ways to Get a Girlfriend), but we do speak AT LENGTH about picking up women who are in working environments in 21 Great Ways to Get a Girlfriend: http://store.themodernman.com/products/21_great_ways_to_get_a_girlfriend.php
Sections about picking up women in work environments in 21 Great Ways:
Section 1: Clothing store
Section 5: Bartender
Section 6: Waitress
Section 13: Women who work at take away/take out stores
Section 20: Receptionist
Section 21: Strippers/exotic dancers
You will learn critical techniques and insights from 21 Great Ways to Get a Girlfriend regarding picking up women in work environments. Most of the techniques will apply when picking up the masseuse. However, I’ll give you some specific advice for free as thanks for your comments and question.
PICKING UP THE MASSEUSE
Here’s what I recommend you do.
Option 1: Invite her to come out and party with you
You: “Hey, so you do go out much on the weekends?” or “Hey, how was your weekend – did you go out to party?”
Her: Doesn’t matter what she says.
You: “Well, a friend (or a group of my friends) are going to [insert name of bar, party or interesting event] on Saturday night. You should come”
Getting her out of the work environment and having a good time with you when you are not in “Customer > Client” mode will allow things to escalate naturally. Just make sure you do escalate! Don’t act like a friend – flirt, create more attraction and escalate. If you need to learn how to escalate to touch, getting alone together, kissing, sex, etc – watch Dating Power: http://store.themodernman.com/products/dating_power.php
Option 2: Add her to Facebook and escalate there
Make sure you have photos with you and other hot women on your Facebook, as well as photos with you and friends (can be workmates/co-workers) and you doing cool, interesting, adventurous stuff. A big mistake guys make is having many photos of themselves alone (the worst where they actually hold back the camera and take a photo of themselves alone at home). Show that other women and people actually like you and accept you.
Then, simply start messaging back and forth on Facebook. Make sure you flirt lightly with her and don’t act like a friend. Example:
“Hey beautiful
My back is feeling great today thanks to you. Let me know if you want me to return the favor some time and give you a massage 😉
I’m heading out today to [insert something interesting like meeting up with friends, going shopping for something specific, etc]. Should be interesting! How about you – how’s your day going?
[insert your name]
———-
Okay, hope that helps Robert.
Cheers!
Dan
Good stuff I like it:) If you go to the beach especially on your own how do you go about approaching women? There are hundreds of hot women there all in bikinis and the majority are single. Advice would be interesting or even a video, I think it would be an interesting topic. Thanks 🙂
Hi Oliver
Thanks for your comments and question.
Yes, I provide examples of how I’ve approached and picked up women on the beach in “Dating Stories”, which is a free bonus that comes with Dating Power: http://store.themodernman.com/products/dating_power.php
In one of the examples, a friend and I walked over to where two women where sunbathing. I stopped about a meter away from them and said something like, “Okay guys, as long you don’t try to take advantage of me with my top off, I’m going to put my towel down here and do some sunbathing…and no asking if I need an extra sun lotion rubbed on…” and they started laughing. Listen to Dating Stories to hear the exact words and how I did it. In another example my friend and I ended up playing frisbee with some girls, who then partied with us that night and stayed in our hotel rooms (we were away on a weekend holiday down the coast)…I explain it all in Dating Stories.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan,
Question, so what do you do when women say that they “have a man” and you know they’re lying. I usually just smile and just say “Well then, have a great night or enjoy your evening” and walk off. What do you do in situations like that?
Hi Sid
Thanks for your question.
Yes, if you get the sense she is lying or just saying that to end the interaction instead of directly saying, “I’m not interested” – then it is better to leave. Something about what you’ve said or how you’re coming across has turned her off. If that is happening to you often, you need to learn more about how to attract women properly and how to talk to women.
When it used to happen to me in the early days, I’d feel awkward and say something similar to what you did and then leave. I didn’t know what else to do. However, when I coach guys these days (in bars, clubs, etc) I sometimes get them to speed up their learning process by asking the women, “Okay, no problem – I’ll get out of here then, but can I ask you a quick question about me? If you didn’t have a boyfriend, would you be interested in a guy like me? Can you be honest and tell me – Is there anything I did or said before that would have turned you off?” and the girl(s) will usually be pretty honest.
Honestly though Sid – women won’t say that to you when you’re projecting the right level of confidence and attracting them properly. Have you listened to Mastery Methods & Mindsets yet? If not, I recommend that to you.
Cheers
Dan
Hey dan how much is 1 on 1 coaching? when are you coming to the states? thanks.
DC
Hey DC
I’ll probably be in the States around the end of 2013. For now, I can do phone coaching. Prices and info here: http://www.themodernman.com/phone_coaching.html
The 1 on 1 courses where we go and approach women in bars/clubs/malls together are: http://www.themodernman.com/lifestyle-course.html Would you be interested in doing one of the courses in the States?
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan
Holey crapola that’s a little out of my price range. Anyway I have listened to all of Mastery methods and mindsets and I am almost done with “the flow” BTW I think you should change the name to “Da flow” and wow have I seen some MAJOR improvement!! I hope i can tell a little success story here.
I went to this event that my city puts on evey year. Its an outdoor event in a field with a stage kind of like a music festival. I could not find anyone to go with till the last minute and he didn’t make it because his car ran out of gas on the way there. So I was by myself and I was trying to make my way towards the front of the stage. I noticed these two chicks following me. I found a perfect opportunity to work on my approach skills. So I stopped and playfully asked if they would quit stocking me. They were sisters, one looked at me like I was a freak but the other laughed at me. Me and the nice one talked and I made her laugh a lot. For example she asked how old I was, I gave her a lot of funny answers that were of course not right. I kept that going for a while and I think it kept me mysterious too. I asked if they wanted to keep moving towards the front with me and they said yeah so I grabbed her hand and led the way. We ended up getting much closer to eachother….. like much closer once the lights went out on the field. I wont go into detail. It was a lot of fun and I made a lonely situation into a very good one. This girl likes me a lot I can tell. Before approaching I believed that they thought I was attractive and thats really all i needed. But anyway I actually have some questions.
1. What do I do when I have run out of funny/witty/ playfully cocky things to say when Im trying to attract a girl? This happends when Im texting too.
2. How do I deal with mixed signals? I just texted a girl and her response seemed as if she was very happy to hear from me. But now she is ignoring me.
3. How do I get a girl to text me some, you know “good” pix?
Thanks DAN!
Hey DC
Thanks for your positive feedback and questions.
Question 1: Stop trying so hard. You need to get women chasing you and trying to impress YOU. It is HER who should be worrying about running out of things to say to keep you interested. Stop trying so hard to impress girls and witness what happens. Also, listen to what Mark the Master says about text messages here: http://www.themodernman.com/get_her_begging_to_be_your_girlfriend.html …also, when you do have some money to invest – get Dating Power because we explain how to get women trying to pick you up.
Question 2: I need more info. Show me the back and forth texts you had with her so I can analyze – type them in a comment below if you can mate.
Question 3: You usually need to have had sex with a woman before she will be willing to do that. However, why do you want that anyway? I prefer having sex with a woman to seeing a photo of her. Don’t waste your time on stupid stuff – just talk to girls and move it forward to sex and a relationship. All this BS back and forth texting is for newbies. Get down to action and THEN the relationship will begin.
BTW: I wrote an article on sexting (Sex text messages) here if you want more info: http://www.themodernman.com/dating/should_you_text_her_or_sext_her.html
Cheers
Dan
Hey dan thanks for the answers.
About question two, She actually called me that night and said she was having trouble with her phone and said her text messaging was not working right. She actually sent me some texts and I did not get. She was very happy to hear from me and was glad that I texted her! She said she was searching for me on facebook but didnt know my last name so could not find me. So all is good there.
About question one.
I am having trouble here. I have gotten a lot better at approaching and attracting after listening to MM&M and reading the flow but that is where Im stuck. I can get a girls # and text her that day or a cupple days later. Then what? How do I let her chase me? It seems like after I stop texting thats where the interactions stop and I will never hear from a girl again. How do I attract then sit back and let her do the chasing?
About question 3.
Yeah your right. sex would be much better hahaha!
Hey dan
There is a girl that is coming to my town next month that I have had a crush on for a while now. How would I go about possibly hooking up with her? Should I contact her first on FB or let her contact me?
THanks..
DC
how do i approach to females that know me very well and arent used to this drastic “manly” changed ive turned into wont that be akward or just flat out suspect?
Hi David
Thanks for your question.
Yes, it will be awkward if you use some of tacky pick up and seduction tricks that are taught on the millions of amateur “dating advice” sites online. At The Modern Man, we only teach natural conversation, flirting and attraction techniques that we have TESTED extensively on women. Women won’t see the new you as “suspect” if you do it properly. Instead, they will feel more attraction for you, like you more and respect you more.
Listen to this to learn how we tested our techniques for success with women for YEARS before releasing them to the public.
Cheers
Dan
Now I am big on planning every move I make and I’m working on not overthinking but, with all this information and there is so much of it, how should I combine all this information effectively so that when I approach a woman I know everything I need to do or is it subconcious? (PS: And i’m not saying that it should be quick results I beleive in doing work and memorizing of course too but I wont to spend the right time learning) Thanks!
Hi David
Thanks for your question.
Yes, it is important to know what you’re doing before you approach, but over thinking it never helps. We provide a solution that we call the “See Do” method in Mastery Methods & Mindsets. This is where you simply approach women without thinking ANYTHING at all prior to the approach. However, if the solution was that simple NO MAN would ever need help with approaching women – they’d simply approach and not worry about anything. However, to be able to approach women without feeling nervous, fearful or anxious you need to have the correct MINDSETS in place first. How you think (your mindsets) directly affects your confidence, behavior, actions and conversation. Without proper mindsets, you will feel nervous, avoid taking action and say the wrong things during conversations with women.
I recommend you listen to Mastery Methods and Mindsets. The mindsets eliminate any fear, nervousness or anxiety that you may feel when approaching women, talking to women or when on dates and replace it with unstoppable confidence. The methods are practical things for you to do that will push you outside your comfort zone and into sex, dates, love and relationships with women.
You also mentioned about being able to get to the point where you do it “subconsciously”. What you mean to say is that you do it unconsciously. Listen to the clip on this page called “Becoming a natural with women”: http://www.themodernman.com/audio_vault.html
There are 4 stages:
1. Unconscious incompetence: You don’t even know that you’re doing it wrong.
2. Conscious incompetence: You know what you’re doing wrong.
3. Conscious competence: You can do it correctly, but you have to think about it while doing it.
4. Unconscious competence: You can do it correctly without thinking about it.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan, first wanted to tell that last weekend was pretty good. I
went out with some friends, had fun and i was social! I approach like
3 different girls and a group got 1 phone number and a bbpin.
Well that’s some progress but the question is about something more
specific. At night clubs a little more relax and social and i see as
its easy to go and talk to someone you don’t really know, but at uni
for me it feels more pressure. At my uni there are quite attractive
girls and i want to get control over this area. So a few tips/mindsets
to think before approaching or experience.
Hi Juan
Thanks for your question.
Yes, you need to use a DIFFERENT approach for every environment you meet a woman in. For example: In a shopping mall, you need to stand further away (we explain all the details for each situation in 21 Great Ways to Get a Girlfriend), slow down the conversation and be more relaxed. However, in a bar or club, you need to stand closer, speak loudly, inject energy into the conversation and create a fun vibe.
In terms of approaching at university, we explain that in detail in 21 Great Ways to Get a Girlfriend. However, some tips for now:
– Approach in a relaxed, friendly and easy-going way.
– Don’t put pressure on the situation by trying to pick her up during the first conversation. Just establish a connection, make her laugh and get her attracted to you.
For the full info and instructions, I recommend you listen to 21 Ways.
Cheers
Dan
Dan,
In the classes I’m currently attending I’m the only guy – Now, I have a few of your products, and feel like I’ve generally got a pretty good hang of how things work. Being with the girls one on one I think I’m pretty good at interaction, creating attraction when I like to, etc-.Whenever I’m with the whole group of girls thou I always seem to freeze. I don’t know what to say and I’m unsure of how to behave. I find it a little bit difficult taking the lead in these situations, as I think you mentioned yourself in one of your programs it’s kinda like the girls are speaking in a different language/way. Which get even more obvious when the girls are in groups consisting of basically only girls. They end up having pretty messy conversations, constantly cutting each other off and etc.
My question is, how should I act when in this group of girls only? How do I avoid ”freezing” and not knowing what to say..? I should add aswell that there are a couple of girls there I do find attractive, and possibly would like to start something with.
Cheers!
Hi Joshua
Thanks for your question.
Yes, this one is easy. You don’t have to talk like the girls do, get all giggly and keep cutting off conversations like they do. Talk like a man while ALSO laughing, having fun and throwing in jokes and flirting. You might have seen some guys doing that already; they are confident, masculine and alpha and can talk and joke around with women while ALSO being the man in the situation.
Don’t feel like you need to keep up with them. You’re a man and they are girls/women. They don’t want you to be like them. If you behave like them, they’ll see you as “one of the girls” and you’ll be placed in the friend zone.
Cheers
Dan
hey dan
i don’t know why i always end up being best friends with women and never the lover. how can i avoid it? it’s like a curse.
There was this one time where I came across a beautiful young woman in her early 20s with black hair on the bus, she had very bright white skin, I assumed that she was a goth but she was a very beautiful indeed.
I know I should’ve made the first move & be man & talked to her.
But when I tried to, I froze, fear overwhelmed me.
I didn’t know what to say.
I tried so hard to do it but I didn’t have enough courage to do so, we did make eye contact a few times but I looked away as I couldn’t look into her eyes for long, I was scared that I might give her the wrong idea. In the end I let it slip through my fingers & she got off the bus before me.
How can I avoid this sort of thing & what should do next time so I don’t repeat the same mistake?
Hi Amrish
Thanks for your question.
Don’t worry, most guys freeze up in that situation, but it is something that you can easily overcome. We explain EXACTLY how to approach, talk to and pick up women on public transport in 21 Great Ways to Get a Girlfriend.
You also said, “I couldn’t look into her eyes for long, I was scared that I might give her the wrong idea.” What do mean by “wrong idea” mate?
Cheers
Dan
Cheers Dan for the advice
When I said, “I couldn’t look into her eyes for long, I was scared that I might give her the wrong idea.”
What I meant was that I didn’t want to give her the impression that I’m a creepy guy
That’s what I meant
Hi Amrish
Thanks for explaining.
The only reason a woman will see you as being creepy is if you ARE being creepy about it. The solution is to smile in an easy going, friendly way or smile and wave at her. That will get her attention in a positive way. Then, approach and use the conversation examples we provide in 21 Great Ways to Get a Girlfriend and she’ll be yours.
Cheers
Dan
Cheers Dan for the info
Your advice has helped clear up lot of things, now I realize why most of the girls in my class may not be interested in me.
It would be really cool if you could coach me personally one on one on how to do do all of this, how to approach women, have conversation with them, getting their numbers etc.
That would be awesome
Hi Amrish
Glad I could help mate.
I can coach you over the phone or you can access all of our best techniques for success with women in our products.
Cheers
Dan
Cheers again Dan
I’ll access your products from this site as the phone coaching costs more than I can afford
Hey Dan, can the same approach be used in High school, Im a senior and I want to make my senior year as best as possible, but it seems like if approaching them fails it can get akward because I SEE THEM EVERYDAY plus i can look even more strange if I try it on multiple other girls, but lets say it is succesful is being a player in high school a MYTH?
Hey David
Thanks for your question.
Yes, we get success stories from high school guys almost every day. We also get success stories from guys in their 50s and 60s who’ve gotten back into the dating scene after a divorce. It works for all guys because the way that women feel attraction remains the same regardless of age or culture.
Yes, if you mess up at school/university news can spread pretty quickly and mess up your reputation. If you want specific techniques for school/university environments, listen to 21 Ways. Stu (the natural in our team) was very popular at school and at university and explains the approach he used to make loads of friends and hook up with the hottest girls.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan,
A lot of people have told me that it isn’t a good idea to date women from other countries because of the big difference in culture and that the women will be torn between their homeland and where they live now. The thing is that I have much better success with foreign women living in my country than with women who grew up in my country, and I tend to like foreign women much more too. My outlook matches up much closer with people from other countries in general, so should I be at all concerned that cultural differences will be a problem in the long run? Thanks
Hi Johann
Thanks for your question.
Keeping a relationship together for life these days takes a lot of skill, but mostly it is about choosing the right woman. In your case, it will need to be a woman who can be away from her family and country for long periods of time and be happy with visiting them once every 5-10 years (or whenever you can afford to go).
Personally, I prefer foreign women these days because it’s fun to have something exotic. However, I experience the same problem with every woman: She wants to marry me and have babies with me within months of meeting me. My biggest challenge is trying to avoid that until I am ready to commit for life, because when you know how to attract women and be the real man they want, they basically all want to marry you instantly.
I recommend that you should go with what you feel is best, but make sure you choose the right woman. Don’t just accept any half-decent woman who shows you interest.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan,
Thanks a mil for all your and the guys hard work, you guys have done an awesome job getting this info across in a really easy manner to understand!
I’m seeing a girl for the first time in months. We dated for a while but it never really went anywhere and she lost interest (even though I asked her and she said no she didn’t).
Now we going on a date soon and I don’t wanna mess it up/have a repeat of her losing interest. This makes me feel like I need to try harder at being flirty/funny getting that attraction back, but my question is how do I balance between catching up with her, and playing/joking/teasing with her on the date? It will be for a drink, so should I do it 50/50?
I’d really appreciate it Dan!
Thanks mate.
Matthew
Hi Matthew
Thanks for your question and positive feedback.
By the sound of your comment, it seems as though you didn’t even have sex with her. If that is the case, stop messing around with flirting and talking and escalate it to kissing and then sex. Sex changes everything.
Flirting is important early on, but you need to go to Step 4 of The Flow if you want to have her as a girlfriend.
Cheers
Dan
Hi Dan.
I’m slightly put off talking to women in bars/clubs. Not confidence issues but because they will be drunk (i’m young student so whenever we’re out everyone gets drunk). In the past if i got a number from a club she wasn’t interested the next day and am not sure she even remembers giving me her number. So basically, do women behave differently if drinking?
Secondly, bit of a weird question, but i want to date and have sex with a few different girls like you and others do and not get “settled down with one girl”. How do i go about this and not get the girl into thinking it’s anything serious?
Sorry for the awkward questions lol
Hope to hear from you.
Hi Anon
Thanks for your questions.
1. Like you, not all people get drunk at clubs. Don’t base your final opinion on a couple of experiences. Talk to more women.
Usually, the reason a woman won’t remember giving you her number is that you didn’t make enough of an impression on her. Kiss her. If you are unsure how to escalate to a first kiss, make sure you watch Dating Power.
2. Simple: Don’t act like a boyfriend. Act like a lover. Don’t call her every day, don’t say you miss her, etc. You’ll get the hang of it eventually. However, if you want to live that lifestyle, you need to seeing a couple/few women at once. If you’re new to it and are only seeing one woman, you’ll probably end up falling for her or wanting her as a girlfriend.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan,
First off things are going pretty great for me right now! I have a a few girls that I have casual sex with with nothing serious attached. They know this, although they have told me that they want to date me and I said no they are sill ok with having sex and that’s it. I am on a mission to add more girls like this to my life. I am having a problem though maybe you can help. I can approach a girl and get a number. I will usually wait a few days to text her, so when I do the conversation goes nowhere. I text something to her. She may reply once or twice at the most then I replay and then I never hear from her again. I don’t want to replay 3 or 4 times in a row because I might come off as the D word. If they didn’t like me then why would they give me their number in the first place? Is this happening because I might not be making a connection with them? My flirting is pretty good. I don’t know what to do.
Second question, My condoms keep breaking!! I know this sounds bad, no STD’s yet and no babies. I use latex, should I switch to lamb skin? Thanks for all your help. Your products are awsome!!
DC
Hey DC
Cool – you’re finally getting laid. Awesome to hear of your success.
About your question, “I can approach a girl and get a number. I will usually wait a few days to text her…” That’s not what we advise in Dating Power. Watch the section on following up on phone numbers and follow that advice properly. You won’t run into any problems then.
About the condoms breaking. Make sure you’re wearing big enough condoms. Try a larger size mate. Lol…what a crack up!
Cheers
Dan
So I’m willing to approach and flirt and apply the flow techniques but I can’t seem to translate it to high school…especially because I’ve got attraction for a few girls and even more if I work at this but is the way too do that? More specificially if you had the flow in your high school days what would you do dan? Thanks alot
Hi David
Thanks for your question.
Yes, of course. The Flow is the natural process of a sexual courtship between a man and a woman. If you talk to girls in the way I suggest, it will work for you at any age of life. Most older guys who read The Flow end up saying, “I wish I knew this stuff in high school!” because they realize the power of it. You might be a bit young to realize the power you have right now. It will come to you though. Get used to using the techniques and you will transform into a natural.
Cheers
Dan
Hey Dan…so I finally bought 21 ways today after that whole mess I told you about with buying it living in America and doing paypal…so anyway so far this stuff is great I have only looked at uni, online dating, and a little bit of classes I’m just trying to focus on getting women and being the cool guy in school, but its weird because I’m well known and liked but i guess seen only as a nice guy or just that guy that has potential but doesnt use it…so long story short it’s fresh in my head so far and im trying to build this plan with using the flow and 21 ways…but the question in when i was going over Uni, i asked about getting alot of girls and i believe you mentioned it can get akward with a bad rep especially in a small school so I am not sure if 21 ways answered that question I could be wrong I was just wondering what do you think?
Hi David
Thanks for your question.
You will only get a bad reputation if you approach women like a pick up artist or in other weird ways. Our advice is based on natural attraction and effective socializing. Follow the advice in 21 Ways and you will be coming across as a confident, easy-going cool guy. Women will be attracted to you AND like you when you use the techniques we provide. Most guys just try to be likeable, but forget about being attractive to women. In your case, you need to stop thinking and planning and just approach and say hello. Nothing will happen until you use the techniques to talk to women.
I look forward to reading your success story.
Cheers
Dan
hey dan.
wanted to say that im really enjoying the
results im getting from the flow. Im 42 yo old and in less than two months i have got
five numbers of girls, been on two dates and had sex with two of them. Mind you all these girls are between 22 and 28.Im becoming more confident in flirting, i call it playing, it seems like fun thinking that way and if it doesnt work out i dont feel rejected, i see them as no fun then and not worth persuing.
couple of questions though. Im getting all these dates from women on the bus, standing in line, working in a quite cafe. it seems easy to me if they just appear there and i just go bam and were into it. they are pretty girls, good bodies etc, but not high class glamours.
When i see a glamour from a distance or in a club i either
talk myself out of it or when i do approach it feels deliberate, and i find myself constantly thinking of body language etc.
i can definately feel a difference in my actions between the two but cant seem to find the way to do what im doing on the street or on the fly in a club or with someone i see and want to approach.
what you think.
Hi Neil
Thanks for sharing your success so far. Much appreciated.
I also want to congratulate you for doing the most important thing of all: USING the advice. As you can see, when the advise is USED you get results. You should be proud of yourself. You’re doing what MOST men in this world are absolutely afraid of…even though it’s one of the things they want the most in life.
As for not being able to approach the hotties in the clubs, I recommend you read the following articles:
How to Stop Feeling Intimidated By Beautiful Women
Do You Freeze Up Around Women You Really Like?
She’s Hot, You’re Not, Now What?
How to Attract a Classy Woman
Also, remember to use the technique from The Flow, called “Assume…” (that’s only the first word of the 4-word technique).
Cheers
Dan
hey Dan
i am able to approach women but what to say to her to keep the conversation interesting its hard for me
Hey Xollie
Thanks for your comment.
If that’s your problem, this is the program for you: http://store.themodernman.com/in/3885871
Cheers
Dan
Dan I really appreciate the advice you give in your articles they really opened my eyes and they made me got positive results from the time I started acting like an alpha male. for instance the way I see girls reacting around me in classroom is quite different, am this type of a dude who is silent in class though girls know that am quite funny, naughty and interesting when it comes on having conversations with them , they have this thing of respect to me as well .man judging on the way I see their reaction and attitudes towards me it’s quite good and awesome. am 18 studying grade12 in high school Rwandan by nationality, a country situated in Africa. anyway I would like to ask you what’s wrong with me nowadays judging to this description. ( as am in grade 12 am busy trying to study hard for my national exams which will take place in October for going into college. at school there are quite few hot chicks but I usually don’t talk to them due to the fact that crossing each other alone or in a favorable environment is quite hard and if I go into their class rooms it will seem needy thus I will be at a high risk of getting rejected as seeming needy Is a total turn off to a girl. then probably though I’m not that sure, I have this kind of low self esteem which I’m not still sure that am facing. please Dan hit me hard as you can ). and if possible I’d like you to give me your private email because I badly need it. by the way sorry for my poor English fellas.
Hi Olivier
Thanks for your positive feedback and question.
To avoid coming across as needy or as though you’re trying to pick the girl up, simply DON’T try to pick her up. Just talk to her in an easy-going, confident way. When you talk to a girl in an environment like a classroom or in the yard of a school/university, the aim is not to pick her up. It is simply to establish her attraction for you by letting her experience your confidence. After that, she will begin making it easier for you to talk to her.
Cheers
Dan